42
I trudged back upstairs and collapsed in bed, then fell asleep for another couple of hours.
When I woke up again, my first thought wasn’t of Kevin, or of how nice the weekend had been, or how his scent still lingered on my sheets.
It was of Derek.
I wondered if I was ever going to see him again.
Part of me would have been relieved if he had decided he hated me and was going to stay away. The safe part of me, I should say – the part that knew my future was with Kevin in Syracuse.
But another part of me was anxious beyond belief.
I got up, showered, got dressed, and started studying.
Every fifteen minutes or so, I glanced at my phone, halfway wishing Derek had a cell so I could call him and…
…and what?
Just say ‘hey’?
Tell him, ‘I know I’m back with my boyfriend and all, but I hope we can go on some more dates’?
I told myself I was horrible for stringing Derek along, and even more horrible for thinking of someone else when I was with Kevin.
But I still kept looking at the damn cell phone every fifteen minutes.