Red and Her Wolf (Kingdom, #3)

Wanted.

She squeezed her eyes and licked her lips. “Ewan,” she whispered, so softly she knew he wouldn’t hear through the wall. “I’m… sorry. I’m sorry for the pain I caused you. I’m sorry that I made you the bad guy and you weren’t. I’m sorry for a lot of things.” She rocked. “But mostly I’m sorry because I’m too much of a wimp to tell you to your face.”

Her door opened on squeaky hinges.

She gasped and grabbed her chest as a dark shape slinked into her room. Golden eyes stared at her from within a wolf’s face. Swallowing hard, she scooted to the head of the bed.

“Did you hear that?”

His tail thumped, gold eyes searched her face. Almost as if he could peer below the surface, exposing her soul, her strengths, her weaknesses, taking her measure, and giving it back. Letting her know he saw her, but didn’t judge her.

His onyx colored fur gleamed in the moonlight. Like a dark flame, it fascinated. There wasn’t a mark to mar his coat. His snout was long and regal, long whiskers hardly moving. But the eyes, the eyes that stared back at her sparkled with more than just the wild flicker of wolf, there was intelligence, humanity staring back at her.

Slowly, he crept forward, until she could feel the warm exhalations of his breath brushing against her cold fingertips. Her hand trembled as she reached out, touching the long scar that tracked down the corner of his left eye.

“What happened to your eye?”

He licked his muzzle, anxious energy radiated off him as he danced on his front paws.

This was a huge step for her, but she needed to let go. Not just for him, but for her sanity as well. Hating something for so long was exhausting.

“I don’t mind if you switch forms, Ewan.”

Suddenly the room buzzed with the tick-tock of several clocks, white noise she’d ignored, now blasted her ear drums. Kept tune to the beat of her pulse as his bright white light flared its feelers upon the walls.

When she could see again, he was kneeling. Big, beautiful body draped in shadow and gentle spills of moon glow. Those golden eyes were on her face, her body. Anywhere they touched she felt hot, exposed. Restless beneath her clothes.

“I canna sleep.” His deep burr made her body flare with heat and need.

Violet squeezed her thighs, hoping the pressure might stop the tingles radiating between her legs. It only made it worse. Heart trapped in her throat, she could barely manage to whisper, “You don’t need to kneel.”

He stared at her, seemed like hours, but was likely only minutes, and then he was standing and she saw everything. The fine dusting of black hairs smattered along muscular thighs, abdominals so chiseled she was tempted to run her finger along it just to make sure they were real. Dusky skin with tight brown nipples. She saw other things too. A big thing, stiff and frightening looking. But even while it scared her, a part of her wondered what it might feel like inside her.

It couldn’t be all that bad. There were too many people in the world.

Her mouth was dry.

The whole time she’d studied him, his eyes never left her face. She felt that gaze like an imprint, it bore through her skull. “Why do you look at me like that?” she stammered.

“Because yer fair bonny, Red, and sometimes I’m afraid if I blink, ye’ll disappear like ye did before.”

She tipped her head up to look at him. There was heat in his gaze, but there was more. So much more, she had no idea how to describe it. It made her feel warm, safe, desperate, desired. But mostly, it made her long.

“How do you know, Ewan?”

The mattress dipped as he sat so close the heat off his body emanated against her bare toes. Paralyzed with fear, she couldn’t move, even though she desperately wanted to. She wanted to crawl to him, wrap her arms around his neck and beg him to help her.

All she could do was watch, and breathe.

“Know what?” he asked in that exotic scratchy burr and heat spiraled thick and heady through her stomach, resting between her legs.

It was on the tip of her tongue to beg him to go back to his room, that this was too much, too soon. That she still wasn’t sure how to let go of the past--stupid as it was--but Alice words were an echo in her ear, so she mustered the last sliver of strength and whispered, “That it was me?”

His fingers twitched, like he wanted to touch her, but knew if he did she’d flee.

“Because it is.”

There it was, so simple, and so difficult at the same time. “Even knowing how I feel? What if I can’t ever let this go?”

His smile was wistful. “Doesna matter. I’ll never force myself on ye, Red. But I will always guard ye, protect ye with my life. That is what a mate does.”

She chuckled and he cocked his head, brows drawn in confusion.