CHAPTER TWENTY-FOUR
I spent the remaining days of my vacation spring cleaning the apartment. Lizzy and Lauren took turns sitting on the love seat, watching me go berserk. Berserk being their word, not mine. I was fully functioning and fine given my heartbroken status. No way had I crawled into bed like Mom and refused to come out. I was stronger than that and my apartment was very, very clean.
“Look at that bowl,” I said, gesturing toward the bathroom with my pink, rubber-gloved hand and toilet brush. “You could eat out of it.”
“Babe, all power to you, but I am not inspecting your toilet.” Lauren crossed her legs, swung her foot back and forth.
“No shit, it’s sparkling.”
“I believe you.”
The front door opened and Lizzy walked in. “She still at it?”
Yes, during particularly unlucky times, they’d both be there, commenting and getting in my face. So helpful. Friends and family were the worst. They were also the best, seeing me through this temporary insanity.
“Yes, she is. Please knock before you come in uninvited,” I said.
Mal would be pissed. He hated people just waltzing in. Not that he would ever be here again or cared, so whatever. Maybe I should scrub the kitchen one more time. Going back to work tomorrow would be good. It’d help keep me busy. Reece had dropped off a couple of new bottles of environmental all-surfaces cleanser and a scrubbing brush for me yesterday (I’d worn my old one out.). He got my drive to keep busy right now. Or, if he didn’t get it, he at least had the sense to stay out of my way and not mention any famous drummers.
“And you didn’t close the door properly, Lizzy.”
My sister looked at me over the top of her sunglasses. “That’s because you have another guest about to arrive. Hopefully you’ll be nicer to this one.”
“I’m nice to everyone.”
Lauren winced. “No. Not really. You’re kind of pretty f*cking painful lately. But we love you and we get that you’re hurting, so here we are.”
My frown did feel permanently pressed into my face. Perhaps they had a point. It might be time to move on. If I’d only been with him a week, then mourning him for half a week was probably about right. Too bad my heart disagreed.
“Helllooooo!” cried Ev, appearing around the door frame. “Yeah, okay. Wow, Liz. She needs help.”
“Told you,” said Lauren, standing up to give Ev a hug.
“Um, Anne?” Ev approached me with extreme caution, slowly slipping out of her woolen jacket. “Take the gloves off and go put on clothes that don’t have holes in them. You might want to shower first, wash your hair, maybe? Wouldn’t that be nice?”
“I’ve been cleaning,” I explained, holding the brush up as evidence. “You don’t wear good clothes to clean in.”
Lizzy turned me in the direction of the bathroom. “About the time you’re waving a toilet brush around exclaiming about the beauty of your bowl, it’s probably time to stop and rethink your life.”
“Go back in there and clean you this time,” directed Lauren. “I’ll find you some clothes.”
“Wait.” I turned back to Ev. “Why are you here? Why aren’t you on tour?”
She grimaced. “The tour’s been cancelled. Put off until next year. It’s for the best. They’re saying Lori only has a couple of days left so the guys have all gone to Coeur d’Alene.”
Oh, god. Poor Mal. My ribs squeezed breathtakingly tight.
“Why aren’t you with them?” I asked.
“I’m flying there this afternoon.” She spoke slowly, carefully. “But I wanted to be here for your intervention. And to ask if maybe you wanted to come with me.”
I just stared at her blankly.
“I think he would really appreciate you being there, Anne. I know things got left in a bad place between you two. But I think he could really do with your support right now. Lori would probably like to say good-bye.”
“I turned down her son’s proposal of marriage, so I highly doubt that.”
Ev gave a one-shoulder shrug. “She was sad, but … I don’t think she was mad at you exactly.”
“It doesn’t matter anyway. I can’t go.” I wandered into the bathroom, put away the toilet brush, and peeled off the rubber gloves. Ev, Lauren, and Lizzy huddled in the doorway, watching me. I washed my hands, soaping them up super well. “Look, guys, I appreciate the intervention, not that I believe I needed it. I was just keeping busy before I had to go back to work.”
“Sure you were,” said Lizzy. “That’s why you scoured the ceiling.”
“It was dusty.”
“Focus, ladies.” Lauren clicked her tongue. “Anne, you need to go with Ev. Talk to him.”
I dried my hands with a towel. The girl in the mirror was a bit of a mess, hair lank and skin greasy. They were right there, I had looked better.
“You two were good together,” said Ev. “He got carried away with the wedding idea, but I think he gets that now.”
“Oh, I don’t know. I don’t think there’s so many good ways to take someone refusing to marry you.” I huffed out a laugh. “Not sure there’s any coming back from that one. Thanks for the thought, Ev. But he doesn’t want me there.”
She shook her head. “You don’t know that–”
“Yes, I do.” I put my hands on my hips. It didn’t feel quite right so I swapped over to crossing them over my chest instead. “I texted him the other day, asked if there was anything I could do. If he wanted me there even just as a friend. He said no.”
And yes, Mal’s one-word, two-letter answer had pissed me off and hurt. The fact that I bought myself a new phone for my birthday was somewhat related. As was the mark I needed to paint over on my bedroom wall. Turns out I had a better throwing arm than I was aware of.
Ev, Lauren, and Lizzy just stared at me. Awesome. I could do without yet again having my heartbreak on display for one and all. And that was a shitty, stupid thought. “Seriously, thanks anyway, guys. For everything. I’m going to take your advice and have a shower.”
“That took balls, reaching out to him,” said Lizzy.
“I had to try.”
Lauren frowned at the floor. “We need booze. Food.”
“Yeah,” sighed Lizzy.
My smile started twitching at the edges. I couldn’t quite make it. “Sounds good.”
Ev nodded somberly. Then she paused. “Anne, be smarter than him. If he means something to you, if you get another chance … don’t give up so easily.”
I had nothing. I just stared at her, lost, not a clue how to react or what to do with myself. It was the same damn way I’d been feeling since the night Mal walked out on me.
“Go get cleaned up.” Lizzy hugged me from behind, wrapping her arms around me and squeezing tight. “I’ll organize some food and drinks.”
“Oh, I can do that after I-”
“Anne, please. Let me look after you for a change.”
I nodded slowly, on the verge of tears yet again. “Okay. Thanks.”
Lizzy set her chin on my shoulder, not letting go. “You’re my amazingly strong big sister and I love you. But you are allowed to need help now and then. You don’t have to fix everything on your own anymore, you know?”
“I know.” I didn’t know it exactly, but I was beginning to feel it. And it was warm, wonderful, and everything it should have been. Not being alone in this, having them all here was a beautiful thing. “Thank you.”
***
My birthday didn’t feel like my birthday. The last two had been nice, shopping with Lizzy and going out to dinner with Reece. But this year’s? Not so much. It was a lot like being back with Mom and pasting a smile on my face for Lizzy’s sake. Making a cake and then getting sick after eating half of it because it was what you did.
I’d been back at work for three days now. The “intervention” had stuck. I hadn’t indulged in anymore crazy cleaning marathons. To be fair, the apartment couldn’t get any more hygienic if I tried. I hadn’t heard from Mal again and I didn’t expect I would. End of story.
My stripy jersey dress was definitely the go-to look for dinner with Reece. It made me happy. Heartbreak could be covered over by a million and one things including cake and happy stripy dresses.
F*cking rock stars with their f*cking ridiculous marital demands and their f*cking incredible smell, face, body, voice, sense of humor, mind, generous spirit, and all the rest (Not necessarily in that order.).
F*ck them all. But especially f*ck Mal.
Reece was fifteen minutes late. I tapped my knee-high brown boots on the scuffed wooden floor, beating out a hectic rhythm. No need to mention whom I might have picked up the habit from. Maybe waiting outside was a better idea, out in the cold wind. I trudged down the stairs and out the door while firing off a text message to Reece making sure he hadn’t broken down or anything.
He hadn’t.
I knew this because he was rolling around on the small patch of front lawn with someone. Not in ecstasy so much as agony. Lots of agony, if the groans and grunts were any indication. A battered bouquet of roses lay tossed aside. What the hell?
“Reece?”
No response.
I blinked, double-checking my vision. Was that really … “Mal?”
Yes, Mal and Reece were fighting on the front lawn. Blood wept from a cut on Mal’s brow and on Reece’s lip. A dark mark covered Mal’s cheek and Reece’s shirt was ripped open. They wrestled on, throwing punches and making animalistic-sounding noises.
“Motherf*cking little …” Mal’s drove his fist hard into Reece’s stomach.
Reece grunted and countered by attempting to kick him in the groin. He caught Mal’s thigh instead. Given the way Mal’s face twisted, it obviously stung.
“You’re the asswipe that left her,” sneered Reece.
They came clashing together again, fists and blood flying. Bile stung the back of my throat and I swallowed it back down. Shit, shit, shit. What to do? I fished out my cell phone, dialed Lauren’s number.
“Hi, Anne.”
“Are you guys here? I need Nate out front now, please. Hurry.”
“What’s going on?”
“Mal and Reece are trying to kill each other.”
There was swearing and muttering. “On our way back. We’ll be there in five minutes.”
I hung up. Five minutes. They could hurt each other worse in five minutes and do some real damage if they hadn’t already. I couldn’t wait five minutes. I needed to do something now.
I cupped my hands over my mouth, standing on the front step. “Hey! What the f*ck do you two idiots think you’re doing?”
Reece looked my way and Mal clocked him on the chin. Beyond enraged, they fell on each other again.
Well, that didn’t work.
Then Reece swung hard, catching Mal in the face, knocking him back a step. Mal stood, stunned for a moment. And no damn way could I stand there and watch him get hurt any more. It just wasn’t in me. Reece pulled back his arm, his bloody lips drawn, baring his teeth.
“Reece, no!” I didn’t stop and think. Instead, I made like a fool and rushed in, hell-bent on defending my man.
Mal turned. “Anne.”
I ran straight for him. Reece’s fist hit me in the eye and I dropped. Pain filled my world, blanking my mind. F*ck, did it hurt.
“Are you okay?” asked Mal.
“Ah …” was about the best I could do.
“Anne, oh f*cking hell, I’m so sorry,” Reece babbled.
“Easy,” said Mal. My head was carefully lifted and placed upon a firm jeans-clad thigh.
“Hey. Hi,” I said, somewhat dazed and confused. I covered my battered eye with both hands, breathing through the exquisite agony.
“Pumpkin, what the f*ck were you thinking, running in like that?”
“I was saving you. Or something. You know …”
They had stopped fighting. It was sort of a success.
Excited whimpering came from the box beside me. A little head popped up, then disappeared. What the hell? To the whole scene basically, I couldn’t restrict the question to any one thing happening tonight on the front lawn. The grass was cool and damp beneath me. I lay on my back, staring up at the night sky. My brain pounded. Mal stared down at me, his eyes tight with concern, his face a bloody mess.
“How you feeling?” he asked.
“Ouch.”
“Anne, I’m so damn sorry,” said Reece, looking about as contrite and torn up about it as possible. “Are you alright?”
“I’ll live.” Mostly. “Advil and ice would probably be good.”
“Yep, let’s get you upstairs.” Mal carefully brushed the hair back from my face.
Panting this time came from the box, along with a high-pitched yelp.
“It’s alright, Killer. Mommy’s okay.” Mal put a hand in the box and lifted out a wriggly little body covered in black-and-white fur. A fancy, studded collar sat around his neck, topped off by a big red bow. The bow was bigger than the dog. “Mommy was trying to save Daddy from evil Uncle Reecey, wasn’t she? A nice thing to do, but Daddy is still going to spank Mommy for being so silly and jumping into a fight. Yes he is, because Daddy’s the best.”
“Oh for f*ck’s sake,” mumbled Reece.
“Happy birthday; I got you a puppy.” Mal held the puppy near my face and a wet, pink tongue darted out, licking my chin. He had the darkest, sweetest little eyes. “I named him Killer.”
“Wow.” God, he was cute–the man and the dog both. “Mal, you can’t call something that small Killer.”
“He earned it. Killed one of my Chucks right after I picked him up this afternoon. Chewed a hole right through it.”
The puppy licked me again, nearly getting me on the lips this time.
“Gross, little dude.” I smiled. “I know what you do with that tongue.”
Mal smiled, then handed the puppy to Reece. “Here, carry him up. Don’t drop him.”
“I won’t drop him.”
“You better not.”
More grumbling from Reece and some yips from Killer the puppy. Truly, this night was surreal.
“Wait, Mal. What about your mom?” I asked. “How is she?”
His mouth firmed and his brows descended. “Not good. She doesn’t have long now.”
“What are you doing here?”
His bloody face screwed up and gave me a pained look. “That’s kind of a long story too. I’ll tell it to you upstairs.”
A car pulled to a screeching halt at the curb, and Nate and Lauren rushed out. I waved groggily at them. “It’s okay. They stopped fighting.”
“Ooh, look at the puppy!” cried Lauren.
“You two f*cking idiots. What did you do to her?” Nate squatted down next to me, scowling, studying my rapidly swelling shut eye. The world was a blur on that side. “How’s your head, Anne?”
He turned back to Lauren, who was still busy petting and cooing at Killer. “Lauren, leave the dog and call that nurse friend of yours. If we take Anne anywhere like this people will ask questions I’m assuming she won’t want to answer.”
“Sorry. Yes. Good idea.” Lauren pulled her cell phone out of her purse.
“No, please don’t,” I said. “It’s fine.”
Lauren hesitated, looking between me, Mal, and Nate.
“Really,” I insisted, trying to look perky. “I’m going to have a shiner, but I’m okay.”
“I’ll carry her,” growled Mal when Nate tried to pick me up.
“I’ll walk. Just help me up.” I held up my hands and Nate gently pulled me to my feet. Behind me, Mal jumped up. He gripped my hips, holding me steady as the world slipped and slid.
“Whoa.” My head spun round and round.
“Easy.” Mal stood at my back, letting me lean against him until I found my feet. “F*ck, Anne. I’m so sorry.”
“I’ve never had a black eye before.”
“Could have lived without you getting one now because of me.” His lips brushed against my ear. “Let me carry you.”
“Okay.” Fighting was dumb. Mal and Reece fighting, and me resisting being carried.
Mal picked me up in his big, strong arms while I swooned like a proper romance-novel heroine.
“I’m thinking my career as a prizefighter has come and gone.” I rested my head on his shoulder, breathing in his familiar scent. Man, I’d missed that. Mal just shook his head. I don’t think he was quite ready to see the humor in my getting hit just yet.
Nate opened the front door to our apartment building and the rest followed behind me and Mal, Reece carrying the puppy, and Lauren still trying to pat the puppy.
“You’re back and you got me a puppy?” The concept still seemed strange. It might have been my recent brain injury. I looped an arm around his neck, taking liberties with him while I could. Who knew how long he’d stay this time. Or why he was even back.
“You never had one as a kid.”
“I can’t have pets in this building, Mal.”
“Yeah, I know. I got you a new apartment too. No point doing things halfway, right?”
“Riiiight.” I had the worst feeling he wasn’t joking.
Up the stairs we went. Nate rummaged in my purse and pulled out my keys, opening the door.
“Just put me on the couch, thanks,” I directed. “Ah, there’s an ice pack in the freezer.”
Without a word, Mal deposited me as told then went to find the ice. It didn’t hurt too badly to let him go. Not in comparison to my eye. I kept one hand over it, shielding it from the too-bright overhead light.
“Thanks for coming back, guys,” I said to Nate and Lauren. “Sorry to mess with your night.”
They just looked at me, sort of stunned still. Lauren had on heels and jeans, clearly ready for a night on the town.
“I’m sorry I interrupted your date. And Reece, relax,” I said, moving right along. “It was an accident.”
He gave me eyes full of guilt.
Mal came bustling back in with an ice pack wrapped up in a towel, a bottle of water, and a bottle of Advil.
“Thanks.” I swallowed two of those suckers straight down and held the ice pack over my eye. “Reece and Mal, you need to stop fighting. Can I have that for my birthday, please?”
Without delay, Mal stuck out his hand, ready for shaking.
“Yeah, okay.” Reece moved the puppy to one arm and shook Mal’s hand.
“Thank you.”
“Here,” he said, holding my new dog out to me. The big, red bow had flopped down over Killer’s face and he was growling and tugging on it with his teeth. Cutest thing ever. I hadn’t even realized I wanted a dog but despite my eye throbbing like a bitch, I couldn’t stop smiling. Reece placed him in my lap. Immediately he tried to climb me and lick my chin. Out of the three males present, he was definitely my favorite, despite being the jumpiest.
“Chill, little guy.” Mal sat beside me on the love seat, placing a restraining hand on Killer.
“You sure you’re okay?” asked Lauren, reaching in to give Killer a final scratch behind the ears.
“Yeah, I’ll be fine. Thanks.”
“You want us to go so you can kick Mal’s ass?”
“Please.”
She nodded, grabbed a scowly faced Nate, and dragged him out the door. Because girls got it. Men, not so much.
“Listen, Anne,” said Reece. “I’m sorry about the scene out front. About you getting hit and everything.”
“I know you are, Reece. But right now, I need to yell at Mal. Can we do dinner another time?”
“You’re not going to yell at me?”
“No. I’m going to yell at him, because I’m in love with him.”
Mal stiffened beside me, the hand petting Killer missing a beat.
“Right,” said Reece. “Which means you’re definitely not in love with me, and I need to give up and back off.”
“I’m sorry, Reece.”
“All right.” Reece gave me a sad smile, then leaned in and kissed me on the cheek. “I’ll remember that next time. Just do me a favor? Don’t come to work for a few days. Stay home and give your eye and my guilt time to heal.”
“You got it.”
“So damn sorry about that.”
“I know. It was an accident, Reece. No hard feelings.”
“Yeah, no hard feelings,” he repeated softly. Then he gave me a halfhearted wave and left, closing the door behind him. And here we were, me, Mal, and Killer. The apartment was eerily silent apart from the snuffling, panting puppy. Mal picked him up and put him carefully on the floor.
“I want to yell at you for leaving me the way you did, for disappearing on me,” I said, moving the ice pack from my face. “But I can’t because the situation with your mom is terrible and I know you’re hurting. And for some stupid reason I still feel guilty about not agreeing to marry you even though you asking me was an insane, ridiculous stunt that had next to nothing to do with me.”
“That’s not true. And keep the ice on your face.”
I covered my war wound back up. “I can’t see you clearly if you sit on that side.”
He sighed and knelt before me, his hands on my knees. “Can you see me now?”
“Yes. Why aren’t you with your mom? That’s where you should be.”
“She wanted me here with you on your birthday. I wanted me here with you on your birthday. Neither of us wanted some other guy taking you out. Just the thought of it drove me nuts.” His face tensed up and his hands smoothed up and down my woolen-tight-covered thighs. “Mom and I talked … about you and about everything. She helped me figure a few things out.”
“Such as?”
“You just told Reece you were in love with me.”
“Yes. But what did your mom help you figure out?”
There was growling going on down by Mal’s shoe. We both ignored it.
“I dunno, what a relationship is, what love is. Lots of things. Seeing her and Dad together these last few days …” He pressed my knees apart, getting closer. “You know, I’m in love with you too. I just, I pushed too hard on the wrong thing, at the wrong time, for the wrong reason. I was a whole lot of wrong, pumpkin.”
“Yeah.”
He nodded. “Right girl, wrong everything else.”
My good eye teared up. My bad one had never really stopped, but that was something else altogether. “Thank you. But things went to shit and you disappeared on me again. You need to stop doing that. That’s a boundary, Mal. It’s not the sort of thing I can keep taking from you.”
“I won’t disappear on you again. I promise. We’ll sort things out together.”
“Okay.” I sniffed and smiled. “You better get back to your mom.”
“In the morning. I hired a jet to take us back. She, ah … they think in the next day or two.” He shut his eyes tight and pressed his forehead into my lap. “Hardest f*cking week of my life. Hardly gotten any sleep at all. Will you sleep with me, Anne? I really need you to sleep with me.”
I placed my hand on his head, rubbing at the soft strands of hair. “Whatever you need.”
***
Eleven-forty glowed green on my alarm clock when I woke. We’d turned out all the lights and lain down together on my bed (still a mattress on the floor). The Advil had knocked me out like it always did. Where Mal was now, I had no idea. Distantly, there were footsteps on the stairs, the door opened, and little nails were clicking across the floor. Next thing I knew, Killer was jumping all over me, being psycho energetic. Having greeted me properly, he then bounded over to my stripy jersey dress. I’d tossed it at the set of drawers but they’d failed to catch. It lay on the floor, a perfect puppy bed, apparently.
“Our son needed to take a leak,” said Mal, stripping off his hoodie and toeing off his boots.
“You’re a good father.”
“I know, right? I’m the best.” His jeans went next and there was nothing but him beneath. If only there was more than ambient light from the street to see him by. He crawled underneath the blanket next to me. “How you doing, pumpkin? Your eye’s looking a little messed up.”
“I know. I can’t see out of that side at all. But you’re supposed to tell me I’m beautiful, no matter what.”
“You are beautiful no matter what. You also have an awesome black eye. In the future, no running into fights.” He kissed me, soft and sweet. Then he kissed me deep and wet, sliding his tongue into my mouth. His taste was home, the feel of his hands cradling my head perfection. I ran my fingers over his rib cage and up over his thick shoulders, getting familiar with him once again. My thighs tensed, between my legs turning swollen and wet for him. His thickening cock nudged my hip bone. So damn nice not to be alone in this.
“Happy birthday,” he whispered.
“It is now that you’re here.”
“F*ck, I missed you.”
“Missed you too.”.
“You fell asleep so fast. What’s under here?” He toyed with the hem of my sleep shirt.
“You’ve forgotten already?”
He dragged my T-shirt over my head and tossed it aside. “Oh, breasts. Best present ever. Thanks, pumpkin.”
“You’re very welcome. I’m all about the giving on my birthday.” I sucked in a harsh breath as he licked across first one nipple, then the other. They hardened, aching in the best way possible. “Wait till you see what else I’ve got for you.”
“In here? Show me.” His fingers hooked in the waistband of my underwear, dragging them down and off. “Nice. I need a closer look.”
He crawled between my legs, his fingers drifting up and down my thighs featherlight. Torturously slow, he licked a path from the top of my sex up to my sternum. Every part of me he touched tingled. His mouth covered mine and his hand massaged my p-ssy, a finger sliding deep inside with ease. “I think you like me.”
“Shut up and kiss me.”
He laughed. The finger inside me moved and he rubbed at some sweet spot that drove me out of my f*cking head. I gasped. My neck arched and my eyes opened wide, staring sightlessly up at the ceiling.
“Christ, Mal.”
“That’s it.” His thumb circled my *, making my leg muscles tremble. This was going to be fast and hard, no doubt about it. I might have somewhat neglected my orgasms during his absence. My libido had been on vacation. Now, it was back and then some. A hot mouth closed over one nipple, sucking hard, teasing with tongue.
I moaned and held him to me. “More.”
A second finger joined the first, stretching me slightly, making the contact on my sweet spot so much more effective. My heels dug deep into the mattress. He might just kill me this time, but it would be worth it.
“Tell me you love me,” he said, still toying with my nipple.
“I love you.”
“No you don’t. You’re just saying that ‘cause you want to come.” He rose to look me in the eye with an evil grin. I was done for. “I don’t believe you at all.”
I grabbed his face, mashing our lips together, kissing him hard. Showing him how I felt. Between my legs, his hand never stopped working, driving me out of my mind. Fingers pumped into me again and again. It was almost enough, but not quite. God, the knot building inside of me. So close.
“Do you love me, Anne?” He sat back on his heels, sliding his fingers in and out of me, making the pressure grow.
“Yes.”
From the edge of the bed he grabbed a condom wrapper, ripping it open with his teeth. “Lots?”
I nodded, fighting for breath.
“Like, lots and lots? Or just a little lots?”
“What?”
With a grin, he rolled on the condom. “How much do you love me? How many lots?”
“Mal …” I couldn’t make sense of the question. My hands fisted in the pillow behind my head.
“See, this is what I mean.” He set his arm beside my head and lowered himself over me. Slowly he slid his fingers out of my sex and lined up his cock. I tried to keep my eyes open, but it was a losing battle. My eyelids drifted down. I was lost to the sensation of his thick length pushing into me, making a permanent place for himself. We fit just right.
“I love you more,” he said. Then his fingers slid around my *, giving me what I needed, applying the perfect pressure to set me alight. I exploded. The fire inside of me burning out of control. But so long as I held on to him, it was okay. My legs held him tight, my hands anchoring him to me, bound around his neck. The muscles in my p-ssy grabbed at his cock, greedy and needing.
And he groaned, pressing his cheek into mine.
I drifted back to reality, awareness returning ever so gradually. Mal started moving, slowly at first, sliding in and out. Little shudders wracked me with each stroke.
“Liar,” I whispered, remembering what he’d said. “I love you more.”
He smiled, thrusting into me. “Prove it.”
I wrapped him up in my legs and arms, bringing his mouth to mine, giving him everything. Trusting him with everything. Because I’d finally found someone who could take both the good and the bad, the sad and the happy. I wanted to do the same for him.
He was being so careful, but there was so much emotion built up inside of him. I could feel it, coursing beneath his skin, raging behind his eyes.
“Harder,” I urged him.
He picked up the pace.
“Stop holding back.”
“Anne …” His jaw was tensed, his green eyes ablaze.
“Do it. Give it to me. I can take it.”
Mal didn’t need any more prompting. He gathered me up against him, our skin slapping as he pounded into me. Our hips hit hard, his cock driving deep into the heart of me. It was like standing in a storm, frightening and beautiful both. I’d never trusted anyone to be this rough before, to take things this far. He hammered into me. His teeth fixed on my neck, marking me, as his hand gripped my ass cheek, holding me to him. The whole of him shuddered against me as he buried himself deep and came. He shouted my name, his mouth still pressed against my skin.
I kept my arms and legs tight around him, making him collapse on top of me. The heavy weight of him pinned me to the bed. I could hold on to him forever.
We lay there in silence. My face was wet where he pressed his cheek against it. His sweat or tears, I don’t know, but he shook for a long time. I petted his hair and stroked his back, running my fingers up and down his spine.
“I love you,” I said. “So much I can’t say.”
He trailed his lips against my jaw. “I believe you.”