Rose grabs a purple dress off a nearby rack and waves it in the air. “I’m not letting my friend walk around looking like Barney’s wife. I mean, come on; all this dress is missing is that big green circle on the stomach.” I can’t imagine Rose ever watching the children’s show Barney, so I wonder how she could possibly have this knowledge. I have to admit though, she’s kind of right about the dress now that I really look at it.
“We have some pull-on jeans with an elastic waistband in the back of the store,” the sales associate stutters, looking as if she’s ready to bolt.
Rose appears close to passing out by this point. I’m starting to think Lucian wouldn’t have been such a bad shopping partner after all. “Let’s get out of here.” She grabs my arm and drags me back out into the mall. “I’m not letting that happen to you. You’re pregnant, not someone’s grandma. Come on, there’s a Nordstrom on the next floor. We’ll just buy bigger sizes.” Before I know what’s happening, Rose has me in a dressing room in her preferred store with clothing hanging from every available surface. She holds up a pair of soft, relaxed-fit jeans first. “These are a cotton-spandex blend so they have a lot of give in the waist. I got two sizes bigger as we can always have them tacked in if needed.” I slide my skirt down my legs, letting it pool around my feet. “Holy shit balls. What are you wearing?” she shrieks from behind me.
I look down and cringe as I see Lucian’s modified boxer shorts. “My panties are too tight,” I say defensively. “It was either these or nothing at all.”
“And you picked the first option?” She shakes her head. “When in doubt, go commando. Never mind,” she waves away my protests, “we’ll get some new underwear next.”
“I’m not getting a bigger sized thong,” I warn her, just knowing where this is going. I can’t picture myself going through my pregnancy with a string in my crack. Isn’t this the one time in life that women should be able to consider their comfort first and foremost?
She looks slightly disappointed, but gamely says, “I’m sure we can find you something that will be way better than what you’re wearing. Those probably look amazing on Lucian, but…”
“He looks good in everything.” I give a sappy smile.
“I know, bitch, you don’t have to rub it in,” she jokes as I pull on the jeans.
“Ohhh, these are wonderful,” I moan in bliss. They are baggy in the waist but feel like a pair of well-worn pajamas. I turn in the mirror and look at my butt, noting with relief that it doesn’t look any bigger than it did. “Let’s just get more of these,” I suggest hopefully, only for her to shoot down that idea with a shake of her head.
“We will get a few more pairs, but you don’t want to look as if you wear the same thing everyday, do you?”
I can’t help but giggle at her question. “Did you never notice in the time we were living together that I didn’t have very many clothes? A few pair of jeans IS variety to me.”
“But you’re with one of the hottest guys in the state now. He also happens to be big shit around here. You might have occasion to socialize with him, so don’t you want to have something nice to wear? We won’t buy a lot since you’ll possibly go up a few more sizes before the baby is born, but let’s get enough for you to mix and match.”
“Okay,” I agree, knowing she has a point. Even when casually dressed, Lucian always looks impeccable. I don’t want to be the sloppy girlfriend only wearing jeans, even if they are nice ones.
Rose blows through the store like a professional personal shopper. I cover my ears when she hands the sales associate Lucian’s credit card. I feel so bad over the amount that I try to put things back. I know money is no object for him, and that one of his suits probably cost as much as everything I’ve picked out, but it’s his money. Even if we were married, I would still feel guilty about spending something I didn’t earn.
“Oh, take that look off your face,” Rose scolds as she gathers up some of my bags. “If you need to justify the cost, remember you’re carrying his baby. You didn’t put it in there by yourself. Think of this as dressing your stomach. He should pay for that, right?”
“Er…I guess,” I say, feeling slightly better at her reasoning. I mean, would I feel bad about letting him purchase clothes for the baby? Of course, not. Rose straightens her black pencil skirt and brushes at non-existent lint on her sleeveless cashmere top. She has a cardigan wrapped elegantly around her neck and the ever-present set of pearls lying against her throat. Even after hours of shopping, not a single hair has escaped her chiffon. I, on the other hand, spent half of my time in the dressing room trying to push the limp hair out of my face. “Hey, why don’t we pick out a new outfit for you now,” I suggest, thinking she should be getting something out of this trip.
Rose hands me Lucian’s credit card before looking uneasily around her. The whole thing seems strange since she had no trouble at all shopping for me. “Oh, I…don’t really need anything.”