CHAPTER TWENTY-ONE
With five of us, we had to take two separate cabs to the party. There was a slightly weird moment where I wasn’t sure who to ride with, Dex and Jenn or Emily and Rebecca. I really was the fifth wheel in this case, the singleton. But luckily Rebecca was the first one to speak up and insist that I was riding with her and Emily. Fine by me.
I got in our cab (the first to arrive), which smelled like incense and was filled with the sounds of Bhangra music.
As the cab pulled away from Dex and Jenn’s apartment, Emily started making small talk with the driver about the impending snowfall, while Rebecca picked up my non-welted hand and gave it squeeze.
“So,” she said, leaning in close, her voice dancing. “That couldn’t have gone better.”
“I don’t know what you mean.”
“Oh, come on, Perry. You saw the way Dex was looking at you. We ambushed you guys. He was holding your hand; I saw it.”
I shrugged, not wanting to think too much into it lest my heart start eating away at my logic. “Think nothing of it.”
“I know what you’re doing,” she whispered.
“Do you?” I asked, fixing my eyes on her to show I meant business.
She wasn’t fazed. “Yes.”
Then she brought out the bottle of Jager from her purse. “Pardon me, good sir,” she said, tapping the cabbie on the shoulder. “Do you mind if we quickly imbibe from this? We will be neat and tidy.”
The cabbie eyed the bottle quickly, then eyed Rebecca’s chest. “If you’re quick. Don’t spill, you’ll pay the fine,” he said, pointing at the sign on the door that indicated we’d be paying for any wayward liquids or vomit.
She nodded. “Don’t worry.”
She took a shot straight out of the bottle, then handed it to Emily and me. We exchanged a worried glance between each other, though I suppose the Shownet virgins of the bunch needed it the most, and followed through. The shot burned less the second time, but I was already feeling saucy and lightheaded, which was typically a bad combination.
“I wonder how awkward Jenn and Dex’s car ride is,” I mused out loud.
“Well, if I know them,” Rebecca offered, “one of them is giving the other the silent treatment. Though at this stage, I couldn’t say who. They definitely aren’t acting normal, that’s for certain.”
“You think you’ll make a move tonight?” Emily asked, leaning forward on the other side of her partner.
“Me?”
“Yes darling, you,” Rebecca said. She drummed her long manicured nails on her knees along to the music. The snow outside was starting to stick to the windshield. “If you don’t make a move on him tonight, Perry, I think you’re missing out. You are so bloody alike.”
I let what she said stew in my mind. We were alike. I was seeing this more and more each day. Either we always were, or it was a byproduct of spending too much time together. Maybe he was becoming more like me, as I was becoming more like him. I was certainly adapting to the fearlessness he seemed to possess, at least on the surface. But that didn’t mean anything. It happened all the time with people who were together a lot.
Soon we were pulling up to the restaurant just outside of the downtown area, down by the waterfront where the ferries and cruise ships were. It looked like a normal restaurant in a brick building, nothing fancy, and certainly not indicating there was a party inside.
But as soon as we all stepped out of the cab, after squabbling over who was paying the cab fare (Emily won because she had an actual “real” job), I recognized Dean and Seb standing outside the doorway sharing a cigarillo. The light snow fell lightly around us and was sticking to the ground in bits. To quote a song, it was beginning to feel a lot like Christmas.
I held my jacket close to me and Emily and I both hovered nearby as Rebecca went to hug both of the gamers. They extended the same courtesy to us. When Dean pulled back from our embrace he got the same look on his face that Dex had earlier.
“Wow,” he stuttered.
“Thank you,” I replied with a smile, remembering Dex’s words about taking a compliment. I’d take “wow” as a compliment, wouldn’t you?
“You look great,” he said, and jerked his thumb at me while glancing at Rebecca. “You talk to Bradley about her? Maybe you guys need a third babe in Wine Babes.”
I laughed. “Aw, hell no.”
He grinned at me. “Well, you just went up a few more points in my book.”
“Score for me,” I said with a wink. I don’t know why I winked; I never winked at anyone before, but out it came. The dress, the makeup, the Jager…it was all very dangerous. And suddenly making a “move” on Dex seemed to be not only possible but not the most important thing this evening either. There was a chance I could catch the eyes of other men. Dean was a bit too nerdy to be my type, and Seb seemed to be a bit of a thirty-something slacker, but who knew who else was inside?
“How’s the party?” Rebecca asked.
“Lame. It’s too early, though you guys are some of the last ones to arrive,” he said, taking a puff of the cigarillo and passing it to Seb, who had so far remained quiet. Judging from the red glaze to his eyes, he was just probably very baked.
“Are Jenn and Dex here yet?” I asked.
“Yeah,” he thumbed now at the door. “They got here a few minutes ago.”
“I don’t know how they beat our cab,” Rebecca said, shaking her head. “What about Bradley?”
“Not yet,” Dean said. “But Jimmy is here and he’s in a good mood, buying drinks for people. It’s not an open bar but at least the drinks are cheap and the food is free. As is the karaoke. But man, I wish they had a rule that you didn’t have to listen to it until you were good and drunk.”
He reached out and tapped me lightly on my shoulder. I was shaking in my spot, feeling the cold flakes land on my bare legs. Tights would have been smart.
“He’s looking forward to meeting you again,” he said to me.
I bet, I thought. “Shall we go inside? I’m dying a bit.”
Dean nodded and Seb tossed the smoke out onto a patch of snow that had just formed.
We walked into the restaurant, which was filled with patrons. It was somewhat fancy in that modern way, which meant white tablecloths, black napkins, weird fountains and artwork and lots of mirrors and glass. The waitresses were all dressed like hookers in black.
“We’ve got the room in the back,” Dean said over his shoulder, and we followed him past the main dining room, down a narrow corridor past the bathrooms and into a smaller, cozier space.
The design was the same but there were only about eight round tables with about two to six people at each one. There was an open buffet of appetizers; a small bar in the corner and in front of the room was a small stage where the karaoke machine was hooked up. The lyrics to “Don’t Let the Sun Go Down on Me” were playing on a screen behind it and some middle-aged man in a Hawaiian shirt was doing his best Elton John and/or George Michael impression. It wasn’t very good.
We all cringed in unison at the off-key wails and looked around the party. We spotted Dex and Jenn at the table near the back of the room. It was empty, which was sign enough that we should make our way over.
As we did so, every single head in the room turned to look at us. Most of the people I didn’t recognize at all, but they seemed to know me. They leaned in close to each other and whispered. I didn’t want to know what they were saying.
I stopped in front of Dex and Jenn. They were watching the guy perform and laughing at him, but Dex immediately stood up and pulled out a chair for me beside him.
I smiled quickly at him and sat down as neatly as possible, with Rebecca and Emily going beside me. Dean and Seb went and sat at the table next to us, beside Jimmy Kwan and his very pretty, very petite half-Asian wife. At least, that’s who I assumed it was. Jimmy was Korean-American and I knew he was married, despite the odds (not because he’s Korean, but because he’s a jerk).
I managed to stop staring at them before they looked over.
“How did you guys beat us here?” I asked, leaning closer to Dex.
“We bribed our cabbie. Like hell I’d let you drink the bar clean before I got here.”
“Right,” I said, and turned my attention back to the karaoke singer, who was almost – mercifully – done. “Who is that guy?”
“That’s Rick. He hosts a handyman show. There’s the whole home design and handy f*cks table down by the stage there.”
He pointed at the table next to them, “That’s the whole Amanda Panda’s Animal Friends sector.”
He moved his finger over to the other side of the stage, where a bunch of long-haired dudes were. Despite the festive dress code, most were still wearing band T-shirts. They were all cheering and doing shots of dark booze.
“Crucial Taught?” I asked. “The Shitty Beatles?”
“Close. That’s Riff Raff. The show. That tall guy with the blonde mullet, he’s actually an awesome guitar player. Mick Stevens. Look him up. He could teach you a thing or two, if not just by watching the show.”
“I bet he could,” I said. “But so could you.”
Dex grinned at me and I felt my insides pulse.
“I could. But while I’m good, he’s one of the best.”
“Dex,” I heard a familiar voice say from behind us. I swiveled and looked up to Jimmy Kwan standing there, staring down at me expectantly.
“Jimmy,” Dex said and got up. I followed his lead and got up alongside him. I stuck my hand out for Jimmy. He just eyed it and frowned at me from underneath his spectacles.
“Perry Palomino?” he asked in a tight voice.
I raised my brows at Dex, who did the same in return as he sipped his Jack and Coke. Who else would I be?
“You look a lot different from our first meeting,” Jimmy continued. “And on the show.”
He stroked his chin, seeming to think while eyeing me up and down. OK, I looked different but I still looked like the same girl.
“She got all gussied up for you,” Dex said with his charming grin on display. He leaned in close to Jimmy and whispered in his ear. “Just don’t tell your wife.”
Jimmy chuckled, the first time I’d seen actual harmless amusement on his face. “Well I’m flattered.”
Great, can I sit down now? I thought. I felt awkward and I didn’t need to turn my head to know that other people in the room were looking at us.
“It’s nice to see you again, Jimmy,” I said, taking my hand back and looking him straight through his glasses. “I hope the way you’re ogling me means you’re going to start paying me more.”
Dex burst out in shocked laughter, choking on his drink while Jenn and Rebecca let out a low gasp. I watched Jimmy carefully, wondering if he was going to fire me on the spot for being a smartass.
Instead he smiled, broadly, showing misshapen teeth, and reached over and patted me hard on the arm.
“I like you better already,” he said with a laugh as looked over at Dex, who was trying to get his cough under control. “Good job with her, Dex. You’re corrupting bright young women everywhere.”
“That’s not my doing,” Dex managed to say, setting his drink down and wiping his mouth with the sleeve of his suit jacket. “That’s the real her coming out.”
I shrugged and tried to look nonplussed, though I was also kicking myself for being so risky with my words. Just because it worked with Dex, it didn’t mean it worked with me. Though perhaps this really was me. And it had worked.
“Well, whatever it is,” Jimmy said. “I’m glad to meet you again, Perry. Welcome to the Shownet family. We’re lucky to have you.”
I smiled graciously and shot Dex a shy smile. “And I’m lucky to have Dex here.”
Believe it or not, Dex actually blushed for the first time ever. It was amazingly cute. I sensed Jenn shifting uncomfortably on the other side of him.
Jimmy gave us both an odd look, his attention shifting between us, as if he was trying to suss out our real relationship with each other. Good luck with that. Even I didn’t know at this point.
“Well, we are lucky to have Dex, too,” Jimmy said, and then fixed his eyes on him. “By the way, Dex, do you have a friend called Maximus?”
Both Dex and I perked up.
“Max?” Dex asked. “Yes, why?”
He shot me a nervous glance and I shrugged, just as intrigued as he was.
“He called me the other day, said you two were friends,” Jimmy explained. “He said he was moving to Portland, God knows why, and was wondering if I needed his services.”
“Portland?” I repeated at the same time Dex said “Services?”
Jimmy shrugged. “I think he had an idea for a show. He said you guys were at NYU, I don’t know I couldn’t really understand his accent. He mentioned something about helping you in Red Fox. I haven’t called him back yet; I just wanted to make sure he’s legit.” >
I watched Dex closely. He rubbed at his sideburn and smiled hesitantly. “Yeah, he’s legit…”
Jimmy put his hand on Dex’s shoulder and said, “We’ll talk about this on Monday. By the way, I saw what you shot at the institute. Good stuff. Both of you.”
He turned and went back to his table, leaving Dex and me staring at each other.
“Well, Maximus did mention he might move to the Pacific Northwest,” I pointed out.
“True,” Dex said slowly.
While we were thinking that over, the MC for the night took over the mic and told us the karaoke machine was going on a break and that a dance floor would be forming behind our table. Everyone got up and pushed the table in closer to the others. As we did so, and as a makeshift DJ started pumping out hits from a Mac, Bradley entered the room.
It was hard not to stare at him. He was so tall and handsome, especially with his fashionable five o’ clock shadow and the way his golden highlighted hair set off his blue eyes. His pinstriped navy suit was snazzy too, and made him look a million times richer than anyone in the room, which was ultimately his point.
Everyone at our table was still standing up when he came over. He gave us a short wave and a jackass grin.
“Sorry I’m late,” he said in his smooth voice. He pulled out his chair without hesitation and sat down right beside Jenn. I looked at Rebecca and Emily, who were as tense and wide-eyed as I was. I don’t think any of us could believe his nerve, going straight for his f*ck buddy.
Dex couldn’t believe it either. I watched as his hands tightened over the top of his chair, his knuckles turning a bluish white. I waited for him to lift the chair above his head and ram it into Bradley’s head.
To his credit though, he didn’t, even though I saw his eyes sparking, projecting his patented death glare. I took my hand and gently poked him in the side. He jumped and looked down at me. I smiled sympathetically. He bit his lip, looked back at the two and then quickly muttered, “I’m going to get a shot.”
I watched him walk off as Rebecca got out of her chair and hurried after him.
“Wait for me,” she called.
I eyed Jenn, who had now sat back down beside Bradley. I wanted to flip the entire table over. I could see it all in my head, the drinks flying in the air and covering her from head to toe.
I felt a hand at my elbow, bringing me back to reality, and turned to see Dean standing there. He pushed his glasses up further on his nose.
“Care to dance, Perry?” he asked with the tiniest hint of trepidation.
“What?” I said, surprised. His face fell a tiny bit. “No, I mean, of course. I just can’t dance too well in these heels. Or, like, ever.”
Dean smiled and exhaled at the same time, his teeth white against his cocoa skin. “Good, I can’t dance in general, so you’re in good company.”
I let him lead me to the dance floor, which was quickly filling up with people as a re-mixed version of Justin Timberlake’s “Sexy Back” just started playing over the speakers. I think everyone was just grateful for something else to listen to than god-awful karaoke.
“Seriously, though,” I whispered to Dean. “I’m going to dance like an idiot.”
“Well, let’s see it,” he said. Then he started busting out some pretty impressive dance moves, darting back and forth with just the right head movements, singing along with the song. He was actually good, which meant I was going to look a million times sillier. Oh well. I’d just have to “get my sexy on.”
I started moving and grooving, all the stupid things that I had tried out with Dex in his living room.
Halfway through the song, I was attracting a lot of attention. Well, Dean was too. He was the serious, talented half and I was the silly goof who was dancing like Elaine from Seinfeld. Rebecca and Emily appeared beside us, dancing too, as did Jimmy and his wife, who were off beside the DJ. I turned to see where Dex was and he was right behind me. He shook his head at my moves and grinned, but kept walking past me to go talk to Jimmy.
I kept dancing as the re-mixed beats pounded on, getting faster and faster near the end. I started putting some kicks into my moves.
“Not bad,” Dean yelled above the music, giving me the thumbs up and then working the gesture into his moves seamlessly.
I smiled and kicked again.
This time my shoe came loose.
It left my foot and sailed through the air as if in slow motion and headed right toward Dex.
He turned just in time to see my raspberry platform soaring toward him like a heat-seeking missile. He ducked.
And it went straight into the person who was standing behind Dex: Jimmy Kwan. My shoe smacked him right on the head and bounced off of his dome and onto the DJ’s table with a clunk.
Everyone went silent. I mean, everyone.
I gasped. My hands flew up to my mouth. I was frozen on the spot, mortified beyond belief.
Then the room erupted into peals of laughter. Dex was laughing the hardest of all, so hard he could barely stand back up straight. Jimmy shot me a wry look and slowly shook his head, not impressed. But one quick glance at his wife and she was snickering too.
I knew I was beet red. I felt flushed beyond belief.
Dean put his arm around me, trying to speak but laughing too hard. Finally he sputtered, “Oh man. You just made this the best Christmas party ever!”
I grinned back at him. Unsure at first but then I couldn’t help but laugh either. Served Jimmy right, even though I needed my shoe back.
As if on cue, Jimmy’s wife walked over to me, still giggling, my rogue shoe dangling from her fingers. She placed it in my hands. “I don’t think we’ve been properly introduced. I’m Fae Kwan.”
“Nice to meet you, Fae,” I said. “Sorry about um…my aim.”
She giggled and looked behind her at Jimmy. He was attempting to talk to Dex while rubbing at his head. Dex was trying to keep a straight face but kept on laughing every other second.
“I think my husband will be OK,” she smiled, then noticed the blush on my face. “Do you need some cold water?”
I nodded quickly and Fae led the way out of the room and to the bathrooms.
We made small talk at the sinks, just a bit about the show and the network. I didn’t have to go to the bathroom yet (and I wasn’t about to break the seal this early in the game) so I just dabbed a bunch of cold water on my cheeks and neck, extra careful not to mess up Rebecca’s makeup job.
As we left the restroom Fae told me she was going to talk to the waitress in the restaurant about getting some more food for us before everyone got too drunk. She was afraid my hit to Jimmy was spurring everyone to be more merry and festive than usual and that usually translated into more drinking.
I watched her leave, her tiny form weaving through the restaurant tables, then I took a deep breath and prepared myself to return to the party.
As I turned around I saw Jenn and Bradley appear in the corridor. I froze at the side of the hall. They both shot me nervous glances but kept walking. Past me and past the bathrooms.
“Where the hell do you think you’re going?” I yelled after them. The words shocked me. I couldn’t help it.
Jenn and Bradley came to a halt. Jenn slowly turned around and cocked her head at me, her eyes blazing.
“Excuse me?” she sneered loudly.
I took a more commanding stance in the middle of the hall and looked at them dead on. “I said, where are you going?”
“None of your business, shrimp,” Bradley sniped. “Come on, Jenn, let’s go.” He touched her shoulder briefly in an effort to lead her out of the restaurant. But she wouldn’t move. She just watched me for a few moments and then started walking toward me.
“Jenn!” Bradley hissed, making a grab for her.
She shrugged him off and stopped a couple of feet away.
“What the hell is your deal, Palomino?” she asked in an accusing tone, narrowing her eyes. She was trying to look intimidating. I wasn’t about to have any of that.
“I have no deal, Jenn; I just think it’s a bit, uh, uncouth of you to go sneaking off with your f*ck buddy here in the middle of a party.”
Her jaw dropped. Bradley made a surprised noise from behind her. I smiled, a grin of pure evil.
“Oh, that’s right,” I continued, noting their faces. “Everybody knows. I do. Rebecca does. Your boyfriend does.”
“You don’t know anything,” she spat out through her gritted veneers. That vein in her forehead pulsed dangerously.
“Oh, but we do. You know what we also know? Why, that you’re my Miss Anonymous. Which means you are nothing more than a sad, pathetic, insecure, cold-hearted…cunt. That’s right. Cunt!”
I yelled that last word a lot louder than I should have. Fae caught it as she was coming back down the hallway. She looked at us in shock, afraid of what was going to happen next, and stopped a little way off to make sure nothing stupid happened.
Jenn’s jaw dropped even lower and she let out a small, indignant cry. “How dare you?”
“How dare you!?” I countered, feeling years of anger, years of being bullied and ignored and picked on, all rising through me like an unstoppable volcano. “All this time you were being nice to me and I felt like I had to protect you while you went and diddled Bradley behind Dex’s back. Meanwhile, you were the stupid f*cking bitch who was leaving all those comments on the blog, calling me fat, calling me pathetic. You were just talking about yourself and projecting it on me. That’s all. You’re too selfish and stupid to realize it. And yes, Dex knows. He’s the one who told me. He’s the one who caught you using his computer!”
Jenn looked shocked into submission. Her eyes were almost frozen in anger or fear. Fear that we all knew about her. The truth about her.
Bradley took a tentative step toward her, his arm extended, and whispered, “Is that true, Jenn?”
She snapped out of it and whipped around to face him, her fists clenched at her sides. “No, it’s not true! Perry is just a f*cking psychopath!”
I looked over at Fae, who was inching down the hall, and gave her an apologetic smile. I know I had just shown an ugly and vulgar side of myself, but it had to happen. She returned the smile, perhaps knowing more about Jenn than I knew, and tapped me lightly on the shoulder to lead me back to the party.
“Forget about her,” she said softly. I exhaled loudly, trying to release the building anger. I turned to follow her and saw Rebecca walking toward me, concerned.
“You go back to Dex!” I heard Jenn yell from behind me. “He’s never going to love you, no matter how hard you try to slut it up for him!”
Oh, that did it.
I let out an unearthly scream and whirled around ready to tackle her to the ground and rip her hair out of her head. But just as I made the lunge, I felt hands around both of my arms. Rebecca and Fae had leaped forward and grabbed hold of me, holding me back. In fact, I think at one point I was weightless, my legs kicking out while Rebecca put her arms around me and attempted to pick me up.
Funnily enough, Jenn had also made a go at me but Bradley was right there and scooped her up by the waist.
So it was Jenn and I almost battling to the death outside the bathrooms, save for the people on either side of us, trying to keep the party from turning into a bloodbath.
Realizing how stupid it was to fight Jenn (even though I would win), I eventually relented and let Fae lead me backward away from Jenn’s writhing, screaming form. She was almost foaming at the mouth. I glared at her one last time before turning around while Rebecca marched over to them. I heard her yell at Jenn, “You go for a walk, Jenn, and clear your head!” Then she yelled at Bradley, “And you, mister, don’t you dare follow her. You are coming back to the party with us and sitting down at the table and acting like none of this ever happened!”
That seemed like a pretty tall order from Rebecca. Jenn and I almost got into a fight. How on earth do you pretend that didn’t happen?