“Same reason you keep Amelia around, I guess,” Costello replies, mockery and mirth lacing every syllable he speaks. “He’s blood. They’re deviant, weak little souls, but they’re family and we always entrust hope in our own, don’t we? They’re the only times we offer second chances.” There’s a burst of laughter, before Costello continues, “Or in your case, give Amelia multiple.”
The chortle my father releases worries me, and as I watch, he’s looking far from happy. I don’t know if it’s the topic of me being brought up or me in general, but I know if I stand here anymore, I’ll find out just what is thought of me.
“I knew she’d always cause me a bother, but I never thought it would amass to this. Falling in love with a detective?” my father asks rhetorically, laughing again. “What was I thinking? I should have nipped that in the bud when she first started seeing him. Since then she’s been some fool in love and even after the first breakup, she was reckless. I used it to my advantage and made her believe every lie I told her, but we all spiraled before I could even stop any of it. It doesn’t matter who I know to keep her from getting into trouble, she still finds it. I can’t mold her into what I want now.” There’s a brief interlude, a pause of deliberation. “She’ll be gone soon, I’m sure of it. If not by her own choice, I’m sure she’ll meet her maker with the enemies she making along the way.”
“Won’t you help her?” Costello asks; curiosity is killing him as much as it is me.
“No,” my father’s brisk response hits me hard. “This is a life I sadly cannot save her from anymore. She’s racked up a body count of her own, crossed many lines, and become a deviant I can no longer rescue. Like Giovanni, she’s on the way to self-destruct.”
“From what I heard from your brother, she’s already there.”
Costello confirms that I’m apparently gossip, and I realize again that I live in no family, have no parent to trust, and my future is squandered. I ruined my own life ten times over just so could say I was part of the family. Now I’m no longer that.
I linger on the spot, desolation crashing down on the already broken pieces my soul. I guess they are always right – eavesdroppers never hear anything good about themselves. I’m a walking joke to everyone. No matter how hard I try – I have destroyed my ranking, have left my legacy in tatters, and have annihilated my own chances of salvation.
“Hey,” Zane’s voice comes from behind me, his arm trailing around my back and waist as he comes to stand directly bedside me. “Why are you standing here?”
“I wasn’t needed in there,” I comment, gesturing to the room where we all had drinks prior to the fun and games. “I’m going to head home.”
Zane’s brow furrows and I watch as he tries to read me. “Don’t you like it here? I thought you loved all the fun of a poker night.”
I laugh sadly, shaking my head at just how wrong he is and go to make my exit. “I like very few things in this life, Zane... Expensive liquor, intense sex, and power,” I say, and I stall my attempt to leave. Putting my hand on his shoulder, I lift my body onto tiptoes to whisper into his ear. “Tonight promised me all three.”
“When’s the intense sex coming?” Zane asks, his words whisper into my hearing.
I just smirk and begin to walk away. “See you at home.”
***
I hear everyone come home and get off my bed. I’ve laid for hours in the middle of the bed allowing my mind to roll over the words my father said, and each time, my mind flashes back to the bad omen I was dealt back at Costello’s. I feel like I’m at a limit and the breaths I have are ones I take on borrowed time. I feel as if my life is grains of sand, waiting to run through an hourglass to declare the end.
While my misery continues to drive my insanity through the roof, I hear Zane’s voice and I remember his earlier words – She’ll be playing hard to get. I think we need the challenge... She’s got a fine piece of ass under that dress... It’ll be a way to end the evening, for sure.
I could continue to wallow or I could show him that I don’t take kindly to a man who protects me and then insults me all in one hour.
Unzipping my dress as I hear him tell them he’s coming up to get me, I allow it to pool at my feet and I step out from the loop it’s formed. I make my way to the already open door and open it more, standing in the doorframe ready. I see him walk along the landing, jacket and tie abandoned, top few shirt buttons undone, shirt no longer tucked in. I feel myself moisten immediately, but berate myself to behave and see this through.
“You finally come home then?” I say, standing in my doorway in nothing but my bra and panties.
He exhales, looking me up and down with an aroused and heated look. When he meets my gaze, he smiles cheekily, eagerness maiming him beautifully. “Yeah, we played a few more games,” he says and approaches me, reaching into his side pocket. “These are yours.”
“How do I ever say thank you?” I ask, making sure my seductive tone is alluring enough.