So I walk in, making sure he knows I’m gaining distance on him, but when I get to actually see him, he’s sitting slack in the chair, his suit ruffled, the top buttons of his shirt undone. But what’s more worrying is the stance he’s taken – Zane sits with a hand covering his face; his handsome features hidden. But I feel myself become unbidden at the sight of him. As I begin to panic, I stop the freefall from becoming paralyzing and I remember how he left me again, how I felt, how I still feel, and I use that to harness my emotions. I roll my shoulders, lick my lips, and replace my demeanor from its fallen stance.
“Can’t even bear to look at me now?” Apparently, the coldness of my voice is enough to make him finally look and I just stand before him, a glorified bitch. “You used to look at me a lot when you couldn’t help but fuck my brains out,” I state, frostily executing my words.
“Amelia,” my father snarls.
I look at my father and laugh. “Sorry, Sal, does it make you uncomfortable?” I ask him, callously preparing to unleash everything these two men make me feel. “You shouldn’t be so shocked by that. I’m sure Uncle Alberto will tell you how many times he caught Lorenzo and me while we were supposed to be working. I’m no saint. I don’t intend to be.”
I turn back to take a seat and see Zane looking at me completely destroyed. I always thought that he’d be the man I would love forever, that he would be the one and only to touch me when we finally mastered how we’d be together, but after he had broken my heart, I needed some sort of escape. Shame he’ll never know it was he I was imagining him while Lorenzo was ramming his cock into me. I feel the regret of my comment ripple alive and I worry if any hopes of a distant reconciliation are long forgotten, but I can’t busy myself with false hope, so I take my seat and wonder who to speak to first – father or ex-lover.
When neither does, I decide to take the reins forcefully in my hands.
“So, why is he here?” I ask, turning away from Zane entirely. “Did you find him so you can finally tick that hit off your ever-growing list?”
“No,” my father states, and I see his eyes become hooded. “There is far more to this than that now.”
I begin to laugh, unwilling to believe there’s anything that goes above Zane being murdered. I sit back in my chair, cross my legs over one another, and take on a relaxed pose. If this is solely business, I’m in. I just might as well be comfortable for whatever bullshit my father’s decided to believe in.
“Zane, here, has been pledging for months to be part of the Dio Lavoro,” my father begins to say and I take not two moments to react.
“You’ve got to be fucking crazy!” I screech and uncross my legs to lean forward across the desk. “He isn’t blood; he isn’t even a friend of the family. Why would you even think twice about this matter?”
“Because he’s special to you,” my father states in response.
“Was,” I promptly correct him, and my tone sinks deathly low.
“Whatever, he is something to you and that means something to me.” He watches me as I sit back with my arms crossed over my chest; the look I’m issuing should be enough to kill. “Bambina, quit the resistance,” my father tries in vain. “He’s one of the reasons you’ve shut down. You can tell me until you’re blue in the face that he isn’t, but he is. We all know it. It’s why you came here and raised that gun to me.”
I notice Zane’s sudden uncomfortable shift, his muttering of a swear word. I want to comfort him from the blame he’s about to unleash, but I can’t let him back in. I’m barely holding on right now; if I let him in a third time, I’ll be a goner.
“His willingness to give up his life for us is admirable. He’s even prepared to be initiated into the family. He’s prepared to work directly with us, Amelia, and he’s not backing down without a fight. He has been here for the past three months, fighting to get a meeting.” It seems my father only needs me here for a reaction, not for input. “I finally said yes and called to get you brought home. I don’t know a lot where you’re concerned, but I know enough where he is concerned. He’s the key to you.”
I begin to laugh and stand up. I slam my hands down onto the desk, the rings on my fingers helping to make a gloriously loud noise. I then point a finger to my father and snarl, “You’re delusional.” I stand up straight, turn to Zane, and point a finger to him, too. “And you’re a fucking moron.”
“Amelia!” my father bellows behind me. His tone is so ferocious that I do stop and turn around obediently. “You will stay here and listen to the new plan of action for this family. You haven’t been a part of this family for months. Even long before you went to Italy.” He stands before me, angered, incensed, demonic, and I’m mesmerized to watch. “Now, quit misbehaving and listen. I know you are not in a happy place right now, but I was hoping you’d like what’s about to happen.”
“What could I possibly like about him being in my home?” I ask, completely disregarding Zane sitting with an intent gaze situated on me. “Sorry, Sal, but you have me confused with someone who would care about him.”