CHAPTER 17: AMY
I woke up about three hours early on the day of my first rehearsal with Shannon. Even though I had only slept for a few hours, I felt wide awake.
Yesterday, in preparation, I had gone into the registrar’s office for show my valid contract and sign the school’s agreement for ‘Premiere Performers’. It was a program put in place to deal with the school’s working performers. It allowed students working in the industry to come in and out of lessons as their schedule permitted, provided that it did not interfere with the rehearsal schedule of the school. That was Liam’s one policy. He believed you could catch up with everything else, but rehearsal, where you learned the most, was not to be missed. So I was to attend Shannon’s rehearsals every morning, and Liam’s Beauty and the Beast every afternoon; making up class work on the weekends. My father was appalled at first at the schedule and worried about everything. To my surprise, it had been Liam who had come to my rescue.
“What Amy needs for her acting career now is not more lessons. She’s miles ahead of even the senior students in the school. Now she needs experience and contacts with the right people,” he said to my father during a private meeting. “That was what this school was always designed for, and that is what we can give her. Amy is already well ahead of her mandatory credits. She was home schooled well and could have graduated a year early, I’m sure. Her graduation and education are of no concern. She would be the first choice of any college in the country.”
Dad had hesitated, but when he saw my midterm report, he relented. I knew he didn’t agree with my dreams of being an actress, although I could see it in his eyes that he would cross that bridge when he came to it. At the moment, his primary concern was my graduation. However, when he left, I could only give Liam a look.
“I’m not doing you a kindness, Amy,” he said, responding to my raised eyebrow. “I was simply telling the truth.”
“That’s a first for you, isn’t it?” I snapped, and he couldn’t quite hide the wounded look on his face. For a moment, I felt bad about it. I hadn’t meant to snap at him like that, but it seemed every time I got close to him or someone near him, another thing came out that I didn’t know about. This wasn’t how relationships were supposed to be, and I knew it.
His face hardened a second later and he turned away.
“I’ll see you at rehearsal tomorrow.”
“Right,” I replied and left.
Getting into the shower and letting the warm water wash away my fatigue, I scrubbed my hair thoroughly. I wanted everything to be perfect for my first day of rehearsal.
I chose to wear all black because I didn’t know what my character would be like, and I slipped into my comfortable black sneakers. I pulled my hair back, but did full makeup and made sure my nail polish wasn’t chipped.
Then, to finalize the look, I added a beanie hat and aviator sunglasses that I had gotten in a discount sale. Now, the image looking back at me was that of an actress; an artist.
I dreaded going to Beauty and The Beast rehearsal this afternoon; hearing Liam’s voice command me from some dark corner of the auditorium. All I wanted was to go to Gatsby rehearsal and stay there forever.
I left twenty minutes earlier than I needed to, resolving to walk slowly and take my time. I had the script tucked under my arm and my headphones connected to my cell phone. In my excitement and need for distraction, I video-called Sarah as I walked.
“Amy?” Her face popped up on the screen, although it was blurry and dark. “What’s the matter?”
“Nothing,” I replied. “It’s my first Gatsby rehearsal today.”
“That’s great, but uh, time change?” she said, settling back on her pillows. “You couldn’t have called me on your lunch break?”
“By lunch I’ll be either awesome or dead on the floor,” I said, looking up briefly to make sure I knew where I was going. She sighed, and then smiled, propping herself up more.
“So? Have you memorized your lines?”
“Yeah. All four of them,” I said, looking both ways and then crossing the street. “But I mean…It’s not the number of lines you have, it’s the number of scenes you’re in. And I’m in a lot. In the background, but still.”
Sarah laughed quietly, and then reached over to her nightstand to get some water.
“I’m sure you’ll be great. They cast you, didn’t they? So it’s not like they don’t know how talented you are. Man, I can’t believe this is happening to you, I’m so jealous.”
“Don’t be,” I said. “Because as soon as I get in good and make connections, I’ll slip your name in.”
“Sweet,” Sarah grinned. “Hey, what about the ballerina? Porsche? Did they take her, so at least you’ll know someone there?”
“Uh…” I looked up to narrowly miss a lamp post. “If they did, I don’t know about it. Dancers are usually separate anyway.”
“Don’t worry, you’ll make new friends,” Sarah promised. “What did Liam say?”
“He said…” I averted my eyes, looking elsewhere. “I don’t know. It doesn’t matter anymore, does it?”
“You miss him, eh?” Sarah asked and I shrugged.
“I miss…having someone to talk to. I mean, you’re a million miles away and I can’t always just whisper something to you. And with Liam, everything felt so comfortable, like we could read each other’s minds. They call it chemistry in this industry.”
“And what else do you miss?” Sarah quirked an eyebrow at me, and I rolled my eyes.
“Shut up,” I said, and she laughed.
“Look, Amy, I’m exhausted. Call me if you have a nervous breakdown, hopefully on your lunch break.”
I nodded. I was only a few feet from the studio now and my excitement was building.
I opened the door to the rehearsal building, trying to calm myself. I was breathing like I had just run a marathon and my heart was racing a million miles a minute. With shaky hands, I reached into my purse, pulling out a water bottle and taking a sip. Finally, I ducked into the washroom, redoing my hair and applying lip gloss. When I was only 5 minutes early, I emerged, heading to the huge rehearsal hall where I could hear voices talking.
I was stunned by the amount of people crowded into it. They were separated into two groups and one of them was clearly more confident than the other. I quickly realized that the less confidant group was probably the one I belonged to, full of extras and crowd fillers. In the middle of the room, however, was what caught my eye. Belonging to neither group, the dancers flexed and stretched into impossible positions. They were the most gorgeous of the two groups, their bodies lean and toned and their faces glowing as they moved. In the center of the room, I recognized the two guys from the audition, although their names escaped me. To my delight, Porsche was there as well, watching as one of them helped another girl with a twist. She stepped forward, giving advice and demonstrating with her own twist, which was flawless.
Not knowing anyone else, I stepped forward.
"Hi," I said, when there was a break in movement. Porsche turned, smiling at me.
"Hey Amy. How's it going?"
"Good. I didn't know you were going to be here."
"First rehearsal, everyone is, and then we separate later. Your stuff goes over there," she pointed to a corner where about a hundred bags and coats were gathered and I realized everyone was unburdened. Sheepishly, I nodded.
"Sure. What are...what are you guys for? Are you like extra talented parts of the crowd?" I asked and she smiled, with a shrug.
"Kind of. Gatsby is an extravagant man who throws lots of parties where performers entertain his guests. It'll be the first time it's done this way - part musical, part ballet. Makes the show a hell of a lot longer, but apparently better."
"Cool," I said.
Shannon came into the room, accompanied by her own entourage. Silence followed and I was aware that I was the only one making noise as I scrambled to my stuff away.
She gave me a look, and I nearly dropped my bag, hustling over to the group of crowd fillers. Finally, when I was standing quietly, she spoke.
"Let's go from top to bottom and see what we come up with. No interruptions. Divide yourselves up."
Those were the only instructions she gave. Everyone seemed to be scrambling, knowing what to do. I looked around in confusion, and then reached out to grab Porsche as she went past. She winced on instinct, pulling her wrist back instantly. My eyes widened.
"I'm sorry, are you hurt? I just didn't know what to do, where do I go? How can we run the show when it's first rehearsal?"
She took my hand, pulling me to the other side of the room.
"This is the way Shannon works. You run it in first rehearsal, do what feels right, and then she'll base it off what your character does," she hissed at me, reaching down to pull up her sleeve. To my horror, I saw it was raw where I grabbed it.
"Porsche, are you getting ..." I trailed off. Lesions were an advanced sign of AIDS, and there was no way she could be that sick already.
"No. I slipped during a step, that's all," she pulled her thin sleeve down with a shrug. She didn't seem concerned, and I let it go, remembering that even if she was, it didn't matter. Liam would give her immortality.
Bitterly, I turned my attention back to rehearsal. I had no idea how I was supposed to proceed. My character only had 4 lines in the show, and all of them seemed to make her a fan-girl of Gatsby. I played them over and over again in my head as I watched the scene go by. The first crowd scene, and my first line, was in the second scene. I decided that if my character were a fan girl of Gatsby, then she would always try to be close to him.
When the scene changed, I fixed my eyes on Gatsby, who was actually incredibly attractive. With dark hair and dark eyes that sparkled, he had natural warmth about him and a fantastic smile. It was not difficult to pretend to be obsessed with him.
"Oh, Mr. Gatsby," I said when the time came, making sure I was right beside him. He kept moving though, and so I decided to follow. "You truly are the greatest host, and your parties are soooo much fun."
"STOP!" To my horror, I heard Shannon's voice. Looking over to the table, where the panel sat, I saw her standing up, and she did not look happy.
"Uh..." I froze.
"Amy, do you know what upstaging is?" She asked, sternly, and I nodded.
"You are a crowd filler, Amy, not the center of attention. You are a chorus girl, not a lead, so blend into the chorus. Say your line from the back and if no one, especially Gatsby hears you, then all the better."
"But..." I said, and Shannon sighed.
"Be part of the background noise. What you have to say isn't important."
My cheeks were burning as I nodded. I kept my head down, but I could feel that everyone was staring at me. I desperately wanted Shannon to start the rehearsal again. When she finally did, I breathed a sigh of relief.
My next line came after nearly half an hour. Following instructions from last time, I hid in the back. I had been excited about this line, because one of the leads would be speaking to me, over the crowd.
"Oh, Mr. Gatsby is over there. You can't miss him," I said, quietly.
"AMY!!!" Shannon's voice came again and I turned, stunned.
"Yes?"
"Nick Caraway is asking you an important question. Nick is a lead and I can't hear a word you are saying."
"But you said..." I answered, confused. Shannon rolled her eyes.
"Amy, if you can't figure out how to build character, then perhaps you need to stay at school longer."
I heard snickers around me, and I ducked my head. Tears threatened to fill my eyes.
"Right," I muttered and Shannon sighed, sitting back down.
"Continue."
It seemed everything I did was wrong. I was taught to never have my back to the audience, yet Shannon screamed at me when I didn't turn properly to leave. I thought I was supposed to be Gatsby's biggest fan, but we never even crossed each other’s paths.
By the end of the rehearsal, I wanted nothing more than to collapse into a ball and cry. Everyone was glancing at me, yet no one said a word to me as I gathered my stuff. I turned to see if Porsche wanted to walk home with me, but she was deep in conversation with the other dancers.
Zipping up my coat, I headed out the door alone. My phone was blinking with several messages from Sarah, wanting to know how it went. Ignoring them, I shoved my hands into my pocket, ducking my head against the wind. The weather seemed a lot more miserable this afternoon, but perhaps that was just my attitude. I felt so lost and confused. No one else needed to be corrected in their actions. I thought I knew what I was doing, but it was clear I was well out of my depth.
I grabbed some lunch in the canteen quickly, a quick sandwich that I unwrapped and ate in the hallway. I didn't even want to talk to my Dad.
I was grateful to slip into the familiar theater, at school, and clamored on the stage where I knew my place. Liam and Deon were already there, with the rest of the cast. They had started half an hour earlier, allowing me time for lunch. One of the stage assistants was reading my lines, and I tapped her on the shoulder. She smiled and nodded, and I turned my attention to the scene.
“The soup is delicious."
"Only the best for you." They said in unison, and I burst into laughter, the first time I had laughed all morning. With Liam doing only one show, and directing the rest, I knew he wasn't as strong on the lines yet. Clearly, they had decided to do a run through. Sitting on the stage, as they weren't going through formal blocking, I fed them lines and let them reply together; each one helping the other when they got stuck. They sounded like a two headed dragon, and the rest of the theater was soon giggling along with me.
"I love you ... Beasts," I said, with a grin on my face as I closed the scene. The rest of the cast burst into applause. Even Liam met my eyes and smiled. It was the nicest we had been to each other in weeks, but I couldn't help it. I felt so relieved to be here and not screamed at every four minutes.
"Thank you, Deon," Liam said. "That helped, a lot."
"It got a pretty good reaction. Let's do the shows like that." Deon replied as he wandered over to me. "Hey Amy, how would you like to be double-teamed?"
"Whaaa?" My jaw fell open and he grinned, offering me a hand up.
"How was rehearsal with the pros?"
"I don't really want to talk about it," I said, and Liam looked over. The concern in his eyes was prominent, and it was a look I hadn't seen in a long while.
"What happened?" he asked softly. I was tempted for a moment not to tell him, but it all came tumbling out.
"Everything I did was wrong. Shannon did a full run through and told us to do what 'feels right'. But apparently everything I did felt wrong to her. She called me out every second."
"Shannon has some strange ways," Liam said. "No one else I know has ever done that. Don't worry about it, Amy, doing something like that will come with time."
"But I..."
"She cast you and she doesn't even cast the Chorus unless they are amazing," he assured me.
"Thanks," I replied, quietly. We met each other's eyes for a moment and I couldn’t help but feel the urge to reach out and touch him again. Then the moment was broken by the flickering of the stage lights.
"So today is going to be a bit different," Liam said, as the rest of the cast gathered around. "We're running out of time, and I admit part of that is my fault. So we’re just going to do a run through, scene by scene, once with Deon and then once with me. It'll help all of you, because you get two chances to work on things. Now, I know Deon and I play very different Beasts. So I want you to react differently to each of us. Just do what feels right, and I'm positive it'll be just fine." His eyes met mine again and I smiled, softly.
"How late are we going to go tonight, with two run throughs?" Someone asked, and Liam answered without ever taking his eyes off mine.
"I guarantee you'll be done by sunset," he said, and I couldn't help but smirk. We met eyes, sharing a private secret, and just for a moment, I moved my mouth, baring fake fangs at him with a hiss. He struggled to contain his laughter.
"Alright, Deon, let's have you go first so that I can have a bit more time to frantically memorize." He said, and everyone laughed as he shooed us off stage to our respective places.
"I sure hope he's serious about finishing by sunset, I have an audition tonight,” Deon said, as he stood beside me in the wings.
"I'll bet you money we'll be done by sunset," I said, turning to him. "What's your audition for?"
"TV," he said. "It would conflict, but I'm not going to get it. One role, open call. Every actor in the area will be trying. I'm just going to practise auditioning for when we're out there in the real world and have no choice." He smiled at me. "Although apparently you needed no pro audition practice."
"There's some sort of stigma attached to winning a scholarship here," I replied. "And it could be good or bad."
"Looks like it's good in this case," Deon said, as the lights dimmed and the opening music started.
They were very different Beasts, as Liam had mentioned, but I felt like it gave me more freedom. I tried a few things, timidly at first, and then with more courage the second time as Liam nodded approvingly at me. This rehearsal felt so much better, my character flowing through me.
At the end of the last scene, Liam took my hand, turning me towards the nearly empty audience.
"The multi talented Amy, ladies and gentlemen,” he said, and they applauded. I blushed, taking a clumsy curtsy.
"Alright, that's it for today," he said, clapping his hands. "Everyone out and lock the door behind you. Amy, stay a bit longer to go over a few things?"
"Uh..." I glanced at the setting sun, raising an eyebrow. He held my gaze pleadingly, and so I shrugged. I guessed what was coming, but I was in too good of a mood to care.
I sat on the edge of the stage, dangling my legs and saying goodbye to the rest of the cast. When we were finally alone with the door locked, he spoke.
"You were spectacular today," he said softly, and I just shrugged, watching the sunset out of the window.
“Well, at least for half the day."
"Amy," he came to sit beside me. I could already see the beginning of the transformation in his face. “I wasn't there, although I'm sure I will hear it from Shannon later. But I will say this: your talent is beyond belief and everyone knows it. I have never seen anyone with such natural talent and ability. If your technical skills are a bit rusty, then that's fine. Most performers train for years before getting their first job. You know this industry is more than just talent."
"I just felt...like a fish out of water," I said, sighing. "Everything I did was wrong."
"Did she ever call you out on your acting ability? Or just your technical skills?"
"Just tech," I said, and he nodded.
"See."
A silence fell over us, and I turned to face him. I could already see his fangs starting to grow.
"Do you want to go?" I asked, and he sighed, shaking his head.
"No. If you're alright, I'd like to keep going. But only if you're alright, Amy. Because you being tired may help me, but not you."
Realizing he was talking about the quality of my blood at the moment, I took a deep breath.
"I'm tired, but...why? Can't we do this in the morning when you're not..."
"The show runs at 8pm at night, Amy," he said. "Under the Beast makeup, I'll be in full transformation. So I have to get used to feeling this way now."
"What about when you're the prince?" I asked, and he smiled.
"I'll have my own private dressing room, and Porsche the multi-talented will do my makeup."
"But with all those...humans...in the audience..." I said, and he stood up, grinning.
"I have two ways around that. The first is that yes, there will be private citizens and media in attendance. But they will be sold seats in the back row and even then, the prices will be so high, barely anyone will come. It's a media stunt, that’s all."
"And the front row?" I asked, and he grinned.
"It's being billed as a charity event. Rich snobs will purchase a ticket to donate to a child; a sick child who wants more than anything to see their favorite actor up close and personal. Win win."
I laughed out loud. It was genius, even I had to admit it. With rows and rows of excited, infected children, Liam would be fine.
"But what's the second way?" I asked, confused. He smirked, going to his bag on the stage. From it, he pulled a bottle of wine.
"Booze, my dear, is the solution to all the world's problems."
"Classy," I said, getting up. Around other people, I would have to control my sarcasm, but I felt Liam always knew when I was being funny and not being hurtful. Liam smiled, taking a mock bow.
"Do you want some? Or perhaps?" he reached into his bag, pulling out a bottle of water. I took the water, unscrewing the cap. "A toast. To the magic of theater," he said, and I grinned, clinking my bottle against his.
"The magic of theater," I said, and we drank.
We rehearsed until 10pm, although as it got later, it mostly became conversation and giggling, exactly what I needed after a horrid day. Liam went through the whole bottle of wine, and by 10pm, I could see it was time for me to go.
"Shall I call someone for you?" I asked, as we finished the scene. "I really should get to bed."
"Like the phantom of the Opera, I can make my way to my cave through the bowels of the theater,” he said, reaching out to kiss my hand.
"Ok then. As long as you don’t go strangling people with nooses or obsessing over Chorus girls." I didn't draw back as quickly as I should have.
"Chorus girls can be very enticing,” he whispered, meeting my eyes. I stood rigid, fighting hard against giving into the feelings that I knew we both shared. The warmth was back, the sparkle, and I knew it. “Thank you, my dear," he said. "Not all would put up with what you have put up with."
"I didn't," I reminded him softly, meeting his eyes. "I ran away, remember?"
“I do," he whispered. The pain tracing his eyes made me look away. But as I did, I suddenly noticed a pale face at the door of the theater. I screamed, my muscle's freezing. Liam grabbed my arm, startled and half pulling me behind him as he looked in the direction I was staring at. He laughed then, heading to the switch board to push the button to open the theater.
"It's only Porsche," he said, laughing as he let her in. "Porsche, my beloved Russian import, what can we do for you."
She looked tired, her backpack over-stuffed as she strode down the aisle to the theater, waving a paper at Liam.
"I've just checked the ticket list for opening night, your night. We've sold out."
My jaw dropped and I clapped my hands like a child.
"Oh my God, that's amazing."
"Wait," Liam waived his hand in my direction to silence me. “Why do you look unhappy, then?"
"Because an anonymous benefactor bought up every ticket we had left, and donated them to the Leukemia treatment center, as well as the center of blood diseases."
"So...isn't that exactly what we wanted?" I looked from one to the other, confused. Porsche shook her head.
"The tickets were purchased from France, and signed 'S'."
"Selene," Liam growled and I perked up, suddenly remembering the woman I met in the hallway. From the dark look on Liam's face, his origin story came back to me. The beautiful dark French woman in the club who cursed him.
"She's here," I blurted out and they both turned to me, shocked.
"What?"
"She's here. I met her, in the hallway, a few days ago. She was looking for you, Liam ... I'm sorry, I didn't make the connection at all. But she fits your description."
Liam hissed, baring his fangs, and I took a step back. Porsche took the steps two at a time, immediately grabbing his arm. In seconds, I was amazed to see his fangs recede and his face start to gain color again.
"Whoa," I breathed, staring at him as the dark circles receded and he began to look human again. "That's what Shields do."
Porsche gave me a tight lipped smile.
"Among other things. We’ll go to a supernatural party sometime and I’ll show you. Liam?"
"Have you seen her since?" He asked, turning to me and at once seeming sober, his eyes focusing on my face.
"No..."
"You think she knows?" Porsche asked and Liam shrugged.
"I don't know. Amy, Shannon offered you residence right? All of her performers get put up in a hotel if they need."
"Yeah but I live here," I said and Liam shook his head.
"I'll tell her you need to stay there to focus. She'll love it."
"You think I'm in danger?" I asked and Liam took a step forward, taking my hand. The three of us made a strange chain of support.
"I think I want to be extra cautious. This is my mess, not yours." Even though the words were not meant maliciously, they stung. He was reminding me that I ran when he needed me. I felt horrible, my chest aching with despair. Liam had been nothing but supportive to me, and now, he was taking care of my safety before even his own. "You stay in the hotel until we figure out what this bitch wants. Porsche..."
"I'm staying with you," she said, and he gave her a look, but said nothing.
"Amy, I want you to go straight to your rooms and pack whatever you need for the next week. The school has been on lock down for four hours and it's dark, so she can't wander unnoticed. She would never do anything that sloppy. Go now, and I'll be there shortly, after I call Shannon."
"But...." I started, and he waved his hand.
"Go. Please, Amy."
His eyes pleaded with me and I nodded, grabbing my bag and hurrying out of the theater. My heart was hammering as hard as this morning, but I realized one thing: I trusted Liam.