Taking that as my cue to follow, I stepped off the curb again. But Ten, damn him, wasn’t about to let me get near that restaurant.
Growling at him until he gave me some breathing room, I paced the corner of the street, waiting until she made it to the bathroom, or wherever the hell she’d gone, and could reply to me.
But she didn’t reply.
Fed up, I dropped the big bomb. I wasn’t playing around anymore. Fingers shaking so hard I had to delete and retype the message three times before I pushed Send, I wrote, “Don’t do this. I love you, Aspen. Ditch him and come outside to me.”
Anxiety shuddered from my lungs. There. Now she knew. I’d just bared my soul to her and made myself as vulnerable as I’d ever been. Only a cold-hearted person would ignore this, and I knew Aspen. She was the furthest thing from cold-hearted as a person could get. She loved me back. She just had to stop listening to reason and propriety, and she’d realize that.
Another five minutes passed. When she appeared at the table where her date was still waiting, the breath rushed from my lungs. I fully expected her to give him her apologies and come running out to me. But she tucked the back of her skirt up to her legs like a proper lady and seated herself. And their date continued.
I couldn’t look away. I couldn’t blink. Everything inside me shattered. Swiping my hand over my mouth, I turned to my best friend.
His eyes were wide with, what...I didn’t know. Shock, fear, concern, worry. “Gam?”
“Fuck it,” I said. “Let’s get drunk.”
***
“It does not do to dwell on dreams and forget to live.” - J.K. Rowling, Harry Potter and the Sorcerer's Stone
***
ASPEN
My head was pounding. As I let myself into my dark house, I kept the lights out and rested my back against the front door to catch my breath.
The night had gone exactly as I’d planned, which I hated. Philip had been eager to take me out when I’d called him. He hadn’t even had a problem with agreeing to meet there.
I’d asked him about his fiancée straight off, and he’d told me they’d split in February. Then he’d bought me some drinks, and we’d talked university politics until the phone calls and texts had started. I knew it was Noel immediately.
When Philip had told me it was okay to answer them, I’d waved him off, trying to appear as if it’d be rude to answer a call on a date. But then it became rude to ignore my phone because it kept going off and interrupting us. I don’t know what I was thinking; my brain obviously wasn’t screwed on right because I should’ve just turned the entire thing off. Except I’d never been able to do that because subconsciously I’d always been waiting for “the call” from my parents.
I’ll never know why I excused myself to go to the bathroom, either. But I did. And I read his texts. All of them.
It killed me to walk back to Philip.
As inconspicuously as possible, I found where Noel was outside, watching us, and thirty seconds after he dragged his friend off, I stood up, cancelling my date with Philip.
Drawing my phone out of my purse, I let the Prada drop to the ground as I opened the last message he’d sent me.
Don’t do this. I love you, Aspen. Ditch him and come outside to me.
Over and over again, I re-read it, and it hurt more each time my gaze flowed over the words. Moaning, I brought my fist to my mouth and bit my knuckles. But that didn’t help. The tears came anyway.
I slid to the floor and buried my face into my knees as pinpoints of agony stabbed me in the gut. I have no idea how long I sat there, trying to console myself and failing, but my joints were stiff and my head was muzzy. It hurt when someone pounded on my door, making the vibration of it rattle through my spine.
I yelped and slapped my hand over my mouth, hoping the caller hadn’t heard me. Breathing hard, I remained perfectly still, hoping he’d leave without trying again. But thirty seconds later, more pounding followed.
“Dr. Kavanagh,” someone shouted. “I know you’re in there. Dammit! Get your ass out here. Now!”
Wait. That wasn’t Noel’s voice. What the hell?
I scrambled to my feet and slid aside the curtain to peer out the window. Oren Tenning glared back, his hands on his hips. Worried something had happened to Noel, I scrambled to unlock the deadbolt and opened the door.
But he didn’t spill any kind of word about his roommate. Fisting his hands and waving them erratically, he screamed, “What the fuck?”
I cleared my throat, licked my dry lips, and straightened my back. “What do you need, Mr. Tenning?”
“I need you to tell me what the hell happened tonight. When you texted me and asked me to make sure Gam was in a certain place at a certain time... Fuck, I thought you were going to try to get back together with him. Not rip his fucking heart from his fucking chest.”
Tears slipped down my cheeks. I was grateful it was dark and he couldn’t see my face, because my plan to appear unaffected was bombing.
“You used me.”