The Lives of Tao

CHAPTER EIGHT

TRAINING



The music started playing.

Please, not again. Roen, wake up.

Roen turned over and mumbled something incomprehensible, pulling the blanket over his face. Taking control of the body, Tao pulled the blanket off and exposed his ears to the full blast of the radio. Roen groaned and grasped for any sort of cover.

Roen, time to train. Get. Up.

Yawning, Roen rolled over and buried his head back into the pillow. “Training for what? God, it’s early. What time is it?”

Five.

Roen paused, lifted his head, and blinked at the clock. “Why is my alarm set for 5am?”

I set it while you were asleep. Today is your first day of training. The next time you get assaulted by a senior citizen, I want you to have a fighting chance.

“What do you mean you set my alarm? How?”

We will get to that another time. Right now, you have more important tasks at hand.

“Why are you able to read my thoughts, but I can’t read yours? That’s hardly fair.”

If life was fair, you would already be Special Ops, and I would not have to waste time dragging you out of bed. Now, time for a jog.

“Then, why bother talking to me? Can’t you just read my mind?”

The human brain works like a computer. I can extract the information out of you, but it takes some time and much effort. It is faster if we communicate directly.

Roen sighed, shut off the alarm, dragged himself to the bathroom, and brushed his teeth.

“I hate jogging. Can’t you just put me on a diet?”

We are doing that too. I threw out all your frozen dinners.

“What?!” Roen protested angrily with the toothbrush still in his mouth. “That’s supposed to last me the whole week!”

They are also the reason why you huff and puff walking up stairs.

“Wait, how did you throw my stuff out?”

Quit stalling and get dressed, and bring some cash too.

“Ooh, are we going to breakfast?”

Roen finished washing up and rummaged through his closet for anything resembling workout clothes. He finally found an old pair of basketball shorts and a shirt he hadn’t worn in years. They fit him like a bodysuit. Feeling ridiculous, he grabbed a small wad of cash from his desk and left the apartment building. He shivered in the cool wet morning and frowned as he walked down the street. There was a gentle breeze coming from the lake, and the grass was wet from a thick layer of dew. The eerie morning calm was unsettling.

“Where’re we going?”

Down this street and make a right. Run until you hit the lake.

“What! The lake? You’re crazy.”

You are the one talking to yourself.

“Don’t make me regret thinking I’m sane.”

Hush. Just run.

Roen began jogging at a slow pace down the street. This was the first time in years he remembered voluntarily jogging. Except for that time he was chased by a rabid dog, the last time he remembered running was back in high school. And since neither the run from the dog nor the one in high school was actually optional, this could be the first time he ever voluntarily ran. Now that he thought about it, this morning jog wasn’t much of a choice either.

His chest and legs were burning before he reached the end of the block, and he slowed even more. Roen passed by a café, where the smell of hot coffee and breakfast beckoned. His stomach growled, unused to not being fed first thing in the morning.

“It hurts, Tao. Since this is my first time, can I turn back now?”

You want to quit already?

“Yes. I mean, no. I mean, I’m tired. Besides, this is embarrassing. People are laughing at me.”

Forget about them and stop making excuses to fail.

“I’m not. I’m just being practical. Come on, I look idiotic.”

I remember you saying that you were disappointed in how your life turned out and that you used to think that you could have made something of yourself.

“Yeah, so?”

Do you know why that never came true?

“Because my parents forced me to study engineering in college and I had a string of bad luck. It’s not my fault I’m in a job I can’t leave. I have responsibilities now.”

You can always leave your job if you choose to. No one forces you to go to work. They do not lock you up at night. Stop blaming your job and your family for your problems. I have looked into your past, Roen. The problem is you do not seize opportunities when they present themselves. You always quit before things get hard.

Roen stopped running halfway across the bridge over the interstate and leaned over the railing’s edge, trying to catch his breath. “That’s not true! I wasn’t given the chance to succeed. If this is supposed to be a pep talk, you suck at it.”

It is not supposed to be a pep talk. You have had plenty of opportunities in life. You could have chosen to do anything you wanted in college, but you chose the safe route. You could have moved out of the city, but you were afraid of exploring new places. When you hated your job, you could have chosen other pursuits, but you were too lazy. You made your own bed, and now curse others for putting you there.

“You don’t know me. You don’t know what I had to go through. You go to hell!”

But I do know you. I have searched your thoughts and memories. Tao’s sympathy just infuriated Roen even more. I know what haunts you and what regrets you stow away. I find it very sad that you have more regrets in life than happy memories.

“Screw you! I didn’t ask for this, and I don’t need this,” Roen screamed over the noise of the passing cars underneath. “You a*shole! Just get out!” Several runners passing glanced his way, and then pretended he didn’t exist. A few apparently decided to stay clear of him and crossed the street.

“What are you looking at,” he yelled at them. “Never saw a fat guy run before?”

Get a hold of yourself.

“You know what? You go find yourself a new pet project. I’m going home.” Roen was so angry that he could barely see through the stinging tears in his eyes. He turned and began to walk back toward his apartment. “You don’t know what it’s like being me.”

But I do, Roen. I know what you are feeling. I know about your childhood, about being the awkward boy that always got picked on. How you always feel like you are being judged for your weight. Why you look at the ground so much when you walk down the street, ashamed to make eye contact.

Roen kept up his angry gait which was almost as fast as his jogging pace. Perhaps if he ignored this so-called alien’s presence, it would just go away. Maybe he should find a priest and get an exorcism. But then, that would bring back the argument about whether he was sane or not. No matter what he tried, however, he could not keep Tao’s voice out of his head. His frustration mounted.

“I bet you’re like everyone else out there. You probably just possess rich or good-looking people or someone with six-pack abs or some football player. I’m nothing. You probably think you got shafted with such a crappy host.”

That is not true. You have potential. I know it. Tao chuckled, or what amounted to a chuckle from a Quasing. You are really no different from several of my early hosts. Their situations were a bit different than yours, but all three of you share similar angst.

“You mean they were fat with a dead-end job?”

No, they came from wealthy, noble families, but all of you were big babies. The difference is that they learned to overcome their insecurities and grew to be powerful men.

“That’s the stupidest comparison I’ve ever heard.” Roen stopped walking and collapsed on a wooden bench. His chest was throbbing, though he wasn’t sure whether it was from physical exertion or boiling anger.

You underestimate yourself, as always. As I was saying, Vercingetorix was once very much like you are now.

“What? Vercinge... is that a person or a medical disorder?”

Have a little respect for a past host. It is their combined experiences and memories that can make you great. Many of my hosts were great figures in history that changed the course of mankind. The very least you could do is be respectful.

“Whatever,” Roen grumbled as he leaned back and looked up at the sky. It was getting brighter as the sun appeared on the horizon, bathing the city with a soft yellow glow. He took a few minutes to admire the pretty hues. It wasn’t often he got the chance to see the sun rise. After several moments, he finally calmed down, being too tired to stay angry. “So what does this Vercing guy have to do with me?”

He was much like you when I first transitioned with him. He had much but was not satisfied. He had principles, but was not strong enough to follow them, at least at first.

“So what happened? Did you convince him to listen to you, and he discovered a cure for the bubonic plague or something?”

A cure for the Black Death was not discovered until the 1930s. Vercingetorix was a Gaul who united his people and became king at the age of seventeen. He rallied them together and was able to give Caesar one of his rare defeats.

“Hmm, he does sound an awful lot like me,” Roen replied, his voice dripping with sarcasm. “A kid who becomes king and defeats the greatest Roman general of all time is so me. And I suppose he was a coward and a fat-ass as well?”

Vercingetorix was a fine young man and an inspirational leader, but he was not born that way. No one is. Great men are forged, not born. I am not going to insult your intelligence, Roen. You are not great, but you can be if you try. Is that not worth some sacrifice?

Roen grimaced. There was no good way to answer that question. “Fine,” he said grudgingly and paused. “What did this guy do, anyway?”

He led the last great Gaul rebellion against the Roman Empire.

“Why didn’t one of your kind just enter Caesar?”

It is a bit more complicated than that, Roen. We did have someone in Caesar.

Roen looked back down at the ground, puzzled. “I don’t get it. Why would you want a host to fight another one of your own? Was it a Genjix?”

No, it was one of ours. This was before the split. Times were different then. Our goals and strategies were different as well. The Roman Empire had grown overly stagnant with its dominance. It was our belief back then that conflict bred evolution.

“And then what happened?”

Well, Vercingetorix lost the Siege of Gergovia, and was locked up for a few years until Caesar had him strangled in public during the Festival of Jupiter.

“What!”

I never said it was a happy ending. It rarely is. But for a brief instant in time, he burned like the sun and changed the world, and is still remembered to this day. Look to your right, Roen. It is the path back home. If you choose, you can take it. It is safe, easy, and comfortable. You do not have to work out or fight or do anything else you do not want to.

Roen looked down the street. By now, the sun was higher and the streets were alive with activity. The streets were filling up with the morning rush hour, and commuter trains passed along the elevated tracks. The sounds of cars honking and people bustling about filled the air. In the distance, a helicopter overhead was most likely reporting the morning traffic.

Or you can keep moving forward. I will not lie to you. I cannot predict what may become of you. It will require a lot of training, hard work, study, and danger. But in the very end, you will know strength. I swear it. You might just become someone who will make a difference in the world.

“You’re not much of a salesman, are you, Tao?” Roen chuckled sardonically.

I say it like it is.

“What about that other host you said was a big baby like me?”

Ah... my greatest achievement and failure as a host, Genghis Khan.

“No kidding! The Genghis Khan?”

There is more than one?

“That’s awesome. Why do you say he was your greatest failure?”

That is a long story for another time. But I see that potential in you, Roen. I do.

Roen stood up and sighed. “Honestly, I think you’re full of crap. But I’m going to give you the chance to prove me wrong. I guess I’d better get started then.”

He began to walk toward the lake, slowly picking up speed as he moved deeper and deeper into the city. His face burned as he felt the snickering and judging eyes as he lumbered down the busy streets.

Make it drive you.

Roen huffed and puffed, but kept his face looking forward as he navigated past the stark buildings and down busy walkways. All around him, men and women in suits rushed to work. Cars and buses sat bumper to bumper at intersections, exhaling fumes and noise. Like the blood vessels of the city, the streets pumped them through at a frantic pace. He felt very out of place.

Remember the difference between them and the person you wish to be.

Roen gritted his teeth and pushed forward. The sun was beating down on him by the time he reached Buckingham Fountain. He plopped on one of the benches, gasping for breath. The mist from the water shooting high into the air felt cool to the touch. He rolled unceremoniously off the bench to the grass and lay there for several moments and closed his eyes, feeling the heavy thumping in his chest.

“I think I’m going to have a heart attack. I... I can’t breathe.”

Well, Roen, would you like to ask the seventy year-old man next to you to give you CPR?

Roen started to laugh, which aggravated his condition. It was another ten minutes before he felt well enough to sit up without feeling faint. He picked himself up and walked to the fountain, scooping water onto his face.

How do you feel?

“Like I want to throw up.”

Vomiting is a positive sign for this situation. It will only be a matter of time before this becomes routine to you.

“What? I have to do this again?”

Of course. Tomorrow – in fact, every single day.

“This is going to hurt tomorrow. Shoot, I still have to run back home. I don’t think I can make it.”

You will be in a lot of pain tomorrow, but that is part of the progress. Do not worry about running back. The jog was enough. You have that cash?

Roen nodded.

Good, go hail a cab. You are late for work.



That night, Roen lay in bed exhausted, but unable to sleep. His body was still throwing a fit about the workout and his knees wobbled every time he walked up stairs. There was just so much to process. What would all this mean for him, and how would his life change? Obviously, it had already changed considering he worked out today. Was he really sure he was sane? He had an imaginary friend as a kid after all, though this new guy definitely was not as nice. Tao was actually kind of a jerk.

Roen?

“Yes, Tao?”

You should sleep. I am going to wake you up very early tomorrow.

“I can’t sleep, Tao. Tell me a story.”

Once upon a time, there were three bears...

“No, I mean about all those past lives you had. Can you tell me about all those people you inhabited?”

You really want to know?

“Yes. Do you mind?”

Of course not. I am flattered. I can do better than tell you. I can show you while you sleep.

“Is it like when you put those images into my head? They come and go so fast they’re almost subliminal. Can you show it to me for longer than a millisecond?”

I could, but you would receive a debilitating headache and get sick. That is why I only flash them momentarily.

“Forget it then. I have a low enough pain threshold as it is. I’d rather you just tell me.”

The effect will not be painful while you sleep. You will experience it like a dream.

“Really? That’s great. Wait, but if you can do that, why don’t you just show me something useful like how to drive a tank or how to build a rocket?”

Chances are, you will never have to drive a tank regardless. The scenes I show you will feel like a dream. You will not grasp everything and they will not be detailed enough for you to learn something technical. However, they will be sufficient for you to learn about my past. It is your past as well, now.

“That’s fine. Where are you going to start?”

I am not sure. Maybe the best place to start is with the host that I had my greatest triumphs and failures, a young man named Temujin. Do you know who he is? Roen?

Roen was already sound asleep, his loud snoring echoing through the room.