We sometimes think we are getting ahead when we compromise the well-being of another in order to gain something for ourselves. We rationalize this by calling it capitalism or competition. Yet what is more truly competitive than nature itself? One species is always sacrificing in an effort to facilitate a stronger one to prosper. This is not harsh. This is real beauty unfolding. Is it harsh that a tree provides so much shade that grass will not grow below it? Is it harsh that plants will not grow without water? Is it harsh that we cannot survive without food? No, it is beautiful because it is the way of nature. As truly hands-off managers, we understand this principle. We will not choose something for ourselves if it is going to compromise the well-being of the whole. We realize that the best thing we can do for ourselves is to do what is best for the whole.
Hands-off management decisions reflect this understanding. We do not make choices from fear, we make choices from love—a love of what works, not of what we wish would work.
This is what a sports coach does when he doesn’t move his friend’s son to first string just because he likes him more. This is what a coach does when he releases a player who is no longer contributing to the success of the team. This is not cruel, this is real love—a love of what follows the natural way.
Now for the next level: A true leader does not try to instill a need in his people for more and more of his leading. He shows them how they can lead themselves. A true coach does not believe that his people lack ability. He knows that everyone has life in them and that the potential of life is unlimited. He understands that this is a whole system and some people are better doctors than lawyers. Some are better accountants than artists. Everyone has a gift—a greatness within them wanting to come out and be discovered. He sees everyone as amazing and incredible, yet different.
The hands-off manager’s job is to align her employee’s gifts with what they are being asked to contribute. When this task is complete, the manager’s final, ultimate job is revealed: She gives her employees to themselves. She steps aside and lets them become their own coaches. She knows her wisdom can’t compete with the greatness of life that is within them. She understands that they are now aligned with who they are and ready to be on their own. They have “grown up.” She surrenders her position as coach. Now their fullest potential can be fulfilled. Now their true nature, their highest selves, the highest possibilities, have the invitation and the freedom to emerge.
This coach’s new role is to remind her employees of this when they forget, and provide them with all of the back-up, tools, equipment, and manpower they need to be successful. The hands-off manager is now functioning more like a fellow employee than a boss!
Steps to hands-off success in your life
Three action steps to take after reading this chapter.
1. If you see yourself as a manager, supervisor, and leader only, make the commitment today to be a coach, mentor, and partner instead.
2. If your company employs outside coaching for its executives and top account people (most companies do), ask to get some coaching from one of them. It will give you experience receiving coaching from a pro, and you can use that experience to learn how to coach others.
3. Ask someone in your organization to coach you on something today. Sit with them and take notes. Notice how good it feels to be completely open to coaching.
EPILOGUE
Work is love made visible.
—Kahlil Gibran
ABOUT THE AUTHORS
Steve Chandler is one of America’s best-selling authors. His 16 books have been translated into more than 20 languages throughout Europe, China, Japan, the Middle East, and Latin America. His first audiobook, 100 Ways to Motivate Yourself, was named as Chicago Tribune’s Audiobook of the Year in 1997, and King Features Syndicate repeated the honor by naming Chandler’s 50 Ways to Create Great Relationships the 1999 Audiobook of the Year.
Chandler is a business coach and world-famous public speaker who was once called by Fred Knipe, a four-time Emmy award-winning PBS screenwriter, “an insane combination of Anthony Robbins and Jerry Seinfeld.” He recently starred in an episode of NBC’s Starting Over, the Emmy-award winning reality show about life-coaching.
Chandler has been a trainer and consultant to more than 30 Fortune 500 companies worldwide. He graduated from the University of Arizona with a degree in creative writing and political science, spent four years in the U.S. Army in language and psychological warfare, and has been a guest faculty lecturer at the University of Santa Monica, where he teaches in the graduate program of soul-centered leadership.
You can read Steve Chandler’s blog at his Website, www.stevechandler.com, and contact him via e-mail at [email protected]. You can subscribe to Chandler’s motivational messages at www.imindshift.com.
Duane Black is the former executive vice president and chief operating officer of SunCor Development Company, responsible for new acquisitions, legal, accounting, finance, home-building, IT, and community development. He oversaw approximately 150 employees and was a steward of more than 150,000 acres of current and future housing developments in Utah, New Mexico, Arizona, and Idaho.