The Brief Wondrous Life of Oscar Wao

PART III

This happened in January. Me and Lola were living up in the Heights, separate apartments — this was before the whitekids started their invasion, when you could walk the entire length of Upper Manhattan and see not a single yoga mat. Me and Lola weren’t doing that great. Plenty I could tell you, but that’s neither here nor there. All you need to know is that if we talked once a week we were lucky, even though we were nominally boyfriend and girlfriend. All my fault, of course. Couldn’t keep my rabo in my pants, even though she was the most beautiful f*cking girl in the world.
Anyway, I was home that week, no call from the temp agency, when Oscar buzzed me from the street. Hadn’t seen his ass in weeks, since the first days of his return. Jesus, Oscar, I said. Come up, come up. I waited for him in the hall and when he stepped out of the elevator I put the mitts on him. How are you, bro? I’m copacetic, he said. We sat down and I broke up a dutch while he filled me in. I’m going back to Don Bosco soon.
Word? I said. Word, he said. His face was still f*cked up, the left side a little droopy.
You wanna smoke?
I might partake. Just a little, though. I would not want to cloud my faculties.
That last day on our couch he looked like a man at peace with himself. A little distracted but at peace. I would tell Lola that night that it was because he’d finally decided to live, but the truth would turn out to be a little more complicated. You should have seen him. He was so thin, had lost all the weight and was still, still.
What had he been doing? Writing, of course, and reading. Also getting ready to move from Paterson. Wanting to put the past behind him, start a new life. Was trying to decide what he would take with him. Was allowing himself only ten of his books, the core of his canon (his words), was trying to pare it all down to what was necessary. Only what I can carry. It seemed like another odd Oscar thing, until later we would realize it wasn’t.
And then after an inhale he said: Please forgive me, Yunior, but I’m here with an ulterior motive. I wish to know if you could do me a favor.
Anything, bro. Just ask it.
He needed money for his security deposit, had a line on an apartment in Brooklyn. I should have thought about it — Oscar never asked anybody for money — but I didn’t, fell over myself to give it to him. My guilty conscience.
We smoked the dutch and talked about the problems me and Lola were having. You should never have had carnal relations with that Paraguayan girl, he pointed out. I know, I said, I know.
She loves you.
I know that.
Why do you cheat on her, then?
If I knew that, it wouldn’t be a problem.
Maybe you should try to find out.
He stood up.
You ain’t going to wait for Lola?
I must be away to Paterson. I have a date.
You’re shitting me?
He shook his head, the tricky f*ck.
I asked: Is she beautiful?
He smiled. She is.
On Saturday he was gone.



SEVEN

The Final Voyage

The last time he flew to Santo Domingo he’d been startled when the applause broke out, but this time he was prepared, and when the plane landed he clapped until his hands stung.
As soon as he hit the airport exit he called Clives and homeboy picked him up an hour later, found him surrounded by taxistas who were trying to pull him into their cabs. Cristiano, Clives said, what are you doing here?
It’s the Ancient Powers, Oscar said grimly. They won’t leave me alone.
They parked in front of her house and waited almost seven hours before she returned. Clives tried to talk him out of it but he wouldn’t listen. Then she pulled up in the Pathfinder. She looked thinner. His heart seized like a bad leg and for a moment he thought about letting the whole thing go, about returning to Bosco and getting on with his miserable life, but then she stooped over, as if the whole world was watching, and that settled it. He winched down the window. Ybón, he said. She stopped, shaded her eyes, and then recognized him. She said his name too. Oscar. He popped the door and walked over to where she was standing and embraced her.
Her first words? Mi amor, you have to leave right now.
In the middle of the street he told her how it was. He told her that he was in love with her and that he’d been hurt but now he was all right and if he could just have a week alone with her, one short week, then everything would be fine in him and he would be able to face what he had to face and she said I don’t understand and so he said it again, that he loved her more than the Universe and it wasn’t something that he could shake so please come away with me for a little while, lend me your strength and then it would be over if she wanted.
Maybe she did love him a little bit. Maybe in her heart of hearts she left the gym bag on the concrete and got in the taxi with him. But she’d known men like the capitán all her life, had been forced to work in Europe one year straight by niggers like that before she could start earning her own money. Knew also that in the DR they called a cop-divorce a bullet. The gym bag was not left on the street.
I’m going to call him, Oscar, she said, misting up a little. So please go before he gets here.
I’m not going anywhere, he said.
Go, she said.
No, he answered.
He let himself into his abuela’s house (he still had the key). The capitán showed up an hour later, honked his horn a long time, but Oscar didn’t bother to go out. He had gotten out all of La Inca’s photographs, was going through each and every one. When La Inca returned from the bakery she found him scribbling at the kitchen table.
Oscar?
Yes, Abuela, he said, not looking up. It’s me.

It’s hard to explain, he wrote his sister later. I bet it was.


CURSE OF THE CARIBBEAN
For twenty-seven days he did two things: he researched — wrote and he chased her. Sat in front of her house, called her on her beeper, went to the World Famous Riverside, where she worked, walked to the supermarket whenever he saw her truck pull out, just in case she was on her way there. Nine times out of ten she was not. The neighbors, when they saw him on the curb, shook their heads and said, Look at that loco.
At first it was pure terror for her. She didn’t want nothing to do with him; she wouldn’t speak to him, wouldn’t acknowledge him, and the first time she saw him at the club she was so frightened her legs buckled under her. He knew he was scaring her shitless, but he couldn’t help it. By day ten, though, even terror was too much effort and when he followed her down an aisle or smiled at her at work she would hiss, Please go home, Oscar.
She was miserable when she saw him, and miserable, she would tell him later, when she didn’t, convinced that he’d gotten killed. He slipped long passionate letters under her gate, written in English, and the only response he got was when the capitán and his friends called and threatened to chop him to pieces. After each threat he recorded the time and then phoned the embassy and told them that Officer had threatened to kill him, could you please help?
He had hope, because if she really wanted him gone she could have lured him out in the open and let the capitán destroy him. Because if she wanted to she could have had him banned from the Riverside. But she didn’t.
Boy, you can dance good, he wrote in a letter. In another he laid out the plans he had to marry her and take her back to the States.
She started scribbling back notes and passed them to him at the club, or had them mailed to his house. Please, Oscar, I haven’t slept in a week. I don’t want you to end up hurt or dead. Go home.
But beautiful girl, above all beautiful girls, he wrote back. This is my home.
Your real home, mi amor.
A person can’t have two?
Night nineteen, Ybón rang at the gate, and he put down his pen, knew it was her. She leaned over and unlocked the truck door and when he got in he tried to kiss her but she said, Please, stop it. They drove out toward La Romana, where the capitán didn’t have friends supposedly. Nothing new was discussed but he said, I like your new haircut, and she started laughing and crying and said, Really? You don’t think it makes me look cheap?
You and cheap do not compute, Ybón.
What could we do? Lola flew down to see him, begged him to come home, told him that he was only going to get Ybón and himself killed; he listened and then said quietly that she didn’t understand what was at stake. I understand perfectly, she yelled. No, he said sadly, you don’t. His abuela tried to exert her power, tried to use the Voice, but he was no longer the boy she’d known. Something had changed about him. He had gotten some power of his own.
Two weeks into his Final Voyage his mother arrived, and she came loaded for bear. You’re coming home, right now. He shook his head. I can’t, Mami. She grabbed him and tried to pull, but he was like Unus the Untouchable. Mami, he said softly. You’ll hurt yourself.
And you’ll kill yourself.
That’s not what I’m trying to do.
Did I fly down? Of course I did. With Lola. Nothing brings a couple together quite like catastrophe.
Et tu, Yunior? he said when he saw me.
Nothing worked.


THE LAST DAYS OF OSCAR WAO
How incredibly short are twenty-seven days! One evening the capitán and his friends stalked into the Riverside and Oscar stared at the man for a good ten seconds and then, whole body shaking, he left. Didn’t bother to call Clives, jumped in the first taxi he could find. Once in the parking lot of the Riverside he tried again to kiss her and she turned away with her head, not her body. Please don’t. He’ll kill us.
Twenty-seven days. Wrote on each and every one of them, wrote almost three hundred pages if his letters are to be believed. Almost had it too, he said to me one night on the phone, one of the few calls he made to us. What? I wanted to know. What?
You’ll see, was all he would say.
And then the expected happened. One night he and Clives were driving back from the World Famous Riverside and they had to stop at a light and that was where two men got into the cab with them. It was, of course, Gorilla Grod and Solomon Grundy. Good to see you again, Grod said, and then they beat him as best they could, given the limited space inside the cab.
This time Oscar didn’t cry when they drove him back to the cane-fields. Zafra would be here soon, and the cane had grown well and thick and in places you could hear the stalks clackclack-clacking against each other like triffids and you could hear kr?yol voices lost in the night. The smell of the ripening cane was unforgettable, and there was a moon, a beautiful full moon, and Clives begged the men to spare Oscar, but they laughed. You should be worrying, Grod said, about yourself. Oscar laughed a little too through his broken mouth. Don’t worry, Clives, he said. They’re too late. Grod disagreed. Actually I would say we’re just in time. They drove past a bus stop and for a second Oscar imagined he saw his whole family getting on a guagua, even his poor dead abuelo and his poor dead abuela, and who is driving the bus but the Mongoose, and who is the cobrador but the Man Without a Face, but it was nothing but a final fantasy, gone as soon as he blinked, and when the car stopped, Oscar sent telepathic messages to his mom (I love you, se?ora), to his tío (Quit, do, and live), to Lola (I’m so sorry it happened; I will always love you), to all the women he had ever loved — Olga, Maritza, Ana, Jenni, Karen, and all the other ones whose names he’d never known — and of course to Ybón.↓
≡ ‘No matter how far you travel…to whatever reaches of this limitless universe…you will never be…ALONE!’ (The Watcher, Fantastic Four #13 May 1963.)
They walked him into the cane and then turned him around. He tried to stand bravely. (Clives they left tied up in the cab and while they had their backs turned he slipped into the cane, and he would be the one who would deliver Oscar to the family.) They looked at Oscar and he looked at them and then he started to speak. The words coming out like they belonged to someone else, his Spanish good for once. He told them that what they were doing was wrong, that they were going to take a great love out of the world. Love was a rare thing, easily confused with a million other things, and if anybody knew this to be true it was him. He told them about Ybón and the way he loved her and how much they had risked and that they’d started to dream the same dreams and say the same words. He told them that it was only because of her love that he’d been able to do the thing that he had done, the thing they could no longer stop, told them if they killed him they would probably feel nothing and their children would probably feel nothing either, not until they were old and weak or about to be struck by a car and then they would sense him waiting for them on the other side and over there he wouldn’t be no fatboy or dork or kid no girl had ever loved; over there he’d be a hero, an avenger. Because anything you can dream (he put his hand up) you can be.
They waited respectfully for him to finish and then they said, their faces slowly disappearing in the gloom, Listen, we’ll let you go if you tell us what fuego means in English.
Fire, he blurted out, unable to help himself:

Oscar—