Stupid Fast

Chapter 51: ONE ALMOST NORMAL CONVERSATION




Jerri and I were in the kitchen. With a hot washcloth, Jerri cleaned the gravel out of the skin on my leg and ass. I winced, trying not to cry out. Jerri was doing a mom thing, but she didn’t seem like a mom. She was sort of jittery, and she was trying really hard, but I could see she was seeing ghosts or whatever.

“I told Grandma Berba to tell you everything,” Jerri nodded too hard.

“Umm, mission accomplished,” I said.

“I’m surprised she told you at the Jenningses’.”

“Well, you wouldn’t…”

“I couldn’t do it, Felton. I couldn’t tell you. I couldn’t deal with it.”

“Jerri, listen, I’ve decided not to be mad at you.”

“Oh, thank you. Yeah. I don’t know. I don’t think that’s something you can decide. But thank you.” She kept nodding.

I didn’t know if I should say it, but it was on my mind. Dad had girlfriends. I said it.

“I think one of Dad’s girlfriends lives at the nursing home.”

“Oh. Uh huh. Kelly Mayer,” Jerri nodded. “She’s been there for a long time.”

“She recognizes me. She thinks I’m Dad’s ghost.”

“Oh God, oh God, oh God. I’m so sorry, Felton.”

“She’s completely nuts.”

“Uh huh. Yeah. I’ll say. Steve knew how to pick ’em. Kelly was already schizoid twelve years ago when your dad was…She’d call here all hours of the night. I wasn’t much better. Steve went for the weak ones.”

“You weren’t weak, Jerri. You were smart.”

“Yes, smart. Okay. But I was looking for the escape hatch. Right? Your dad…That’s why hicks like me were so attracted to…He was from a different planet. I was weak.”

“Are you…Are you better now?” I asked.

“Oh, no,” Jerri said, shaking her head. “I need serious help.”

We both giggled, which was weird.

“I’m going to get serious help, Felton,” Jerri said seriously when we got done giggling.

***

Jerri went to get some tweezers from the bathroom. While she was gone, the phone rang. Neither of us made a move to answer.

The machine beeped. Cody’s voice carried through the house.

“Uh. Hey. This is a message for Felton. I think his phone’s off. Felton, don’t worry about…Don’t worry about faker or whatever. Nobody cares. Only the seniors from last year. They’re jerks, you know? They’re making a big deal out of it, but nobody else gives a damn. Call me, okay? You still coming up to the baseball game? You should. Give me a call.”

“Oh my God. Everything,” I said.

“What was that about?” Jerri asked, holding up the tweezers as she re-entered the kitchen.

“Bullshit,” I said. And I meant it. I had no interest. There were serious issues in the world. Faker? What a bunch of crap. Jocks are total idiots, I thought, and they’re a*sholes. My dad. If I could punch him.

I had turned my phone off. I wouldn’t turn it back on. And I wasn’t going to any game.

You know, later that day, Cody left another message on our home phone:

“Felton. Didn’t see you at the game and your phone’s off, man. Do I need to come over there and shake you out of bed? Give me a call!”

“Is that Cody threatening you?” Jerri mumbled.

“Probably,” I said. I wanted to rip the phone off the wall. I would have if Grandma Berba hadn’t been there in the kitchen cooking spaghetti. Grandma looked at me and smiled.

“Make sure you call him tomorrow so he knows you’re all right,” she said.

Yeah, right. Honky’s out to get me, is what I thought.

Crazy. Crazy.