Rogue Alliance

FIFTY-FOUR



Looking down at Carmen’s round, youthful face as she slept in much too deep of a sleep, Shyla’s heart broke yet again. With no make-up, a bandage around the top half of her skull, and slight swelling around her eyes, she looked so much younger and eerily vulnerable.

“I’m going downstairs for some coffee,” Carmen’s mother said from the small cot in the corner of the room, “would you like something?”

Shyla tore her eyes from Carmen.

“No, I’m fine. Thanks.”

Sue Dunsworth stood up but didn’t move. She waited, staring awkwardly at Shyla as if she wanted to say something further. Finally, she jammed her hands in her pocket. “She’s gonna be just fine,” she said, “you know. I…uh…well when she gets better, we’d still like it if you came over for dinner.”

Shyla gave a thin smile.

“I’d like that very much. I promise to show up. I’ll even bring desert.”

A smile of relief passed over Sue’s features.

“That sounds good. And don’t pay my husband no mind. He really does love Carmen. He’s just rough around the edges. We both are. But that’s all gonna change. I signed us up for counseling through behavioral services earlier today. Dusty’s not real thrilled with the idea, but he said he’d go. It’s a start.”

Shyla could see how genuine Sue was in her declaration. She felt bad that she had judged her so harshly in the past. Though it was never okay to get physically violent with a child, Shyla also knew all the possibilities of imperfection within the dynamics of a family. It was never simple. She nodded her head and Sue excused herself.

Turning her attention to Carmen, she reached out and grabbed her hand. There was dirt under what was left of her chewed-off finger nails. Otherwise, her hands were perfect, with smooth skin and surprisingly long fingers in proportion to the rest of her. They were hands which had potential. Shyla gave them a squeeze as the tightness in her chest coincided with an overwhelming desire to cry.

“Hey, girl,” she said, softly but firmly, knowing that Carmen wouldn’t recognize her if she was an emotional wreck, “I know you’re in there. I…uh…I wanted to say that I’m sorry I let you down that day. If it’s any consolation, I’ve been a total mess and your mom and I have already made another dinner date. I’m gonna bring something smothered in chocolate. We’ll all be in a chocolate coma by the time I’m done.”

Shyla winced as she realized her poor choice of words.

“Crap, I’m not very good at this. I need you to just go ahead and wake up now, okay?”

With Carmen’s hand still resting in her own, listless and frail, she felt abandoned. Panic rose up as she imagined Carmen like that for the rest of her life. Anxiety crept into her words.

“Do you hear me, Carmen? I need you to wake up. Right now. I need you to open your eyes and look at me,” she demanded.

There was silence, then a flutter of eyelashes, brief but definite. Shyla stood rigid by the side of the bed, her heart pounding with hope.

“Yeah, that’s it,” she said, “come on, Carmen. I’m here waiting for you to give me the riot act.”

Fingers twitched in Shyla’s sweaty palm. She hit the nurse’s call button.

Minutes later, two nurses and the doctor on-call were poking and prodding at Carmen, looking over her vitals and chart. After a thorough examination, and no further signs of consciousness, they eventually gave up and left the room. Shyla knew they were doubtful of what she had reported, but she knew, without a question, what she’d witnessed. A calm settled over her. Carmen was already fighting her way back. It was only a matter of time. Shyla settled into the rocker on the opposite side of the room and decided to wait it out.

Later, after she had brought both Sue and Dustin Dunsworth some take-out for dinner, she offered to sit with her for the rest of the night so they could get some sleep. “Go on,” she said, “I know you’re tired and have to work in the morning. I don’t mind staying at all, in fact, I’d prefer it.”

Now, she was sitting in the room alone with Carmen. It was dark outside, which exacerbated the obnoxious glow of the fluorescent lights of the hospital. She turned off the main one overhead, leaving only the soft glow of the one behind the headboard.

It seemed that, though Dustin was not exactly ready to befriend Shyla, he had at least done away with the overt disdain for her. She wasn’t sure why, but was glad for the sake of Carmen. They all needed to put differences aside if they were going to help her heal.

The room was quiet. Though Carmen was unconscious, her body did not require life support. Her vital signs and reflexes were good and the doctors were all convinced that she would make a full recovery once the swelling from her head injury subsided. Shyla drifted off hanging on to that promise.

With no grasp on how much time had passed, she slowly came to a while later. She wasn’t even sure what had woken her. But then, as her mind cleared, she did. There was a subtle shift in the air, as if she were no longer alone. Looking around, it was dark and the hospital sounds were muffled with the long hours of night. No one else was in the room. Except Carmen. She glanced toward her. Nothing. Just the slow in and out of her breathing, her facial muscles relaxed with sleep until, there it was - a small flutter of lashes like she’d witnessed earlier that day.

Shyla sat forward in anticipation, holding her breath.

“Come on,” she whispered urgently.

Carmen slowly opened her big eyes and looked at Shyla.

Gratitude like she’d never before experienced flooded her system and she sank into the newness of it.

“Thank god,” she said breathlessly, “welcome home, Carmen.”