Nowhere Safe

CHAPTER 54



“What do you think Leanne meant by Czarion?” Ryder asked, driving along the beach highway toward their hotel suite headquarters.

“I don’t know. Never heard of it.” Josh had hoped for closure with this mission, not to open up a whole new set of questions. He still wanted Rikker, but he accepted, now, that finding the agent would not fix what had happened with Chelsea.

Like Sabrina tried to tell him. Chelsea was gone and Josh was still here. If it had turned out the other way around, he wouldn’t have wanted Chelsea so focused on finding Rikker that she’d let her life slide by unlived.

“What are you going to do about Trish?”

Josh tensed at just hearing her name. “Nothing.”

“After all this, you’re just gonna let her go?”

When did the FNG decide Josh and he were BFFs who talked about relationships? “Look, I appreciate what you did at the airport, and your help finding Trish.” Josh waited for Ryder to look over and he said, “I mean it.”

Ryder nodded.

“Trish needs to be with her family and live a normal life with a man who can have a normal life.”

“She told you this?”

She didn’t have to.

Ryder raised an eyebrow. “I see. So now you read minds?”

“No.” Josh really did owe the son of a bitch. Maiming Ryder at this point would be dishonorable.

“How would you take it if someone made your decisions for you?”

Not very well. Which was exactly, he realized, why Trish was always fighting Zane so hard.

Shit. Josh had the sudden insight that he’d been doing it too. The very thing he’d told Zane would undermine Trish. .

Was he shortchanging Trish by deciding for both of them? “I can’t bring her into this world.”

“Her f*cking brother lives in this world. What would be any different with you?”

“I made a vow to someone to never get involved with a woman as long as I’m in this line of work.” A vow that felt as hollow as the inside of his chest. That vow had made sense in his life at one time. Back then. Not now.

“Is that someone going to keep you company in your old age?”

“No. He’s dead.”

“So you’re willing to walk away from Trish for some vow to a dead guy? You’re a dick, you know that?” Ryder grumbled, turning the truck off the main highway.

Maiming the FNG was back on the table. But damn if he didn’t have a point. “Got any other pearls of wisdom or is that it?”

Ryder pulled into the hotel parking lot and left the truck running. “Yeah, I got one more. If I had someone like Trish who was in love with me–or did I misunderstand the way she was looking at you?–I sure as hell wouldn’t quit on her.”

Josh had thought his moment with Trish had been private when he and Ryder had dropped her at home. He’d kissed her, several times, and it would have turned explosive if the FNG hadn’t been there and Trish hadn’t been in a rush to get to Zane and Angel at the hospital.

Ryder turned off his truck. “Or is she not worth the trouble it would take to keep her?”

That struck so hard Josh should have doubled over. The idea of giving her up sucked all the air from his lungs. He realized in that moment just how much he would do to keep her.

Trish was worth everything.

Breaking a vow to a dead man was the least of what he would do.

Josh waited to feel a moment of guilt, but instead he felt a strange calm blanket him at accepting that.

Ryder tapped his fingers on the steering wheel. “Your loss.”

It would be. Josh would never get over wanting to keep her, but Trish would want to know everything about him, including who his parents were. He wanted to continue with Sabrina and Dingo, but he didn’t feel the passion for what he’d always done. Like seducing women. He only wanted one woman.

Lots of wanting and not enough having.

Ryder hadn’t gotten out of the truck. Worse than a dog after a squirrel. He wouldn’t give up. “Life’s short, especially in our line of work. I signed on with Sabrina for freedom. I can accept or turn down an assignment. I can have a life. That’s all I want. The only thing that would make it any better would be finding a woman who likes the outdoors as much as I do. I find that, I’m not turning her loose.”

The FNG was starting to grow on Josh, but there was also the question of Trish tying herself to a man who spent more time in the bleak underbelly of the world than in the light. Would she be willing to do that? Did he still want to do that?

If not, could he tell Sabrina and Dingo goodbye?

He had a decision to make.

Josh didn’t want to talk about it any more with Ryder. He wanted to pack up and find Trish. “I know what you’re saying. I’ve always had to do the right thing and I’ll do it this time.”

They both got out and Josh caught up with Ryder in front of the truck.

Sirens screeched.

Cars pulled up around them, coming from every direction.

Ryder’s hand moved toward his weapon.

Josh warned, “Don’t. This is the real FBI. Let me find out what’s up and see if I can get us out of here.”

A crowd of FBI personnel wearing black windbreakers and with weapons drawn had Josh and Ryder encircled in seconds. “Hands in the air.”

Josh complied, but said, “I’m FBI, too.”

Agent Theron showed his badge and checked Josh’s, then turned to Ryder. “Ryder Van Dyke?”

“Yes.”

“You’re under arrest for the murder of J. K. Kearn.”

Josh turned to Ryder whose imperturbable face was slack with disbelief. Ryder asked, “Kearn’s dead? What happened?”

The agent started reading Miranda.

Ryder ignored him and met Josh’s gaze. “Didn’t do it.”

Josh couldn’t stop this train wreck right now, but he gave Ryder a nod that he hoped conveyed their team rule. Slye never gives up their own.

What the hell had the FNG gotten into?