Nantucket Blue

Thirteen





“AND THIS IS WHY most Americans won’t do this job,” Liz said as I turned in disgust from the dirty toilet in the honeymoon suite. “Or Brits, for that matter.”

“But here we are,” I said. “Confronted with skid marks.”

“I can’t believe these people are on their honeymoon.” Liz shook her head and we promised each other we would never allow such things in our future marriages. “Once you let them see you pee, it’s all downhill,” she added. I nodded in agreement. I couldn’t imagine letting a guy see me pee. Disgusting. Friends, yes. Boys, never.

I used a clean rag to wipe down the sink and thought of the young couple who had been smooching all through breakfast. The man had muscles you could see through his T-shirt, and the woman had perfect white teeth. “You’d think they’d have at least closed the seat,” I said.

“Must be true love,” Liz said, and snapped on the extra-long, yellow latex gloves. “Go tackle the bedroom. I’ve got this loo, but you have to get the next.”

“Deal,” I said, and went to plug in the vacuum cleaner.

For the past week, I’d been consumed by what had happened with Jules. While I was emptying the dishwasher, vacuuming the rugs, or tucking crisp sheets under the corner of a mattress, I was reviewing the scene, obsessing over each word, slowing the fight down, trying to get a grip on it, hoping to figure out exactly where it all went wrong. I’d expected her to call me with an apology, but there hadn’t been a word.

The biggest question in my mind was…why? Why had Jules told Jay what I’d said about his brother? If she didn’t want to hang out with me for some crime too great to be named, if I was bothering her, fine, okay. But to go and ruin my chance with Jay?

I tried to picture the moment she’d done it. Had she exaggerated my comment for a crowd, or had she said it to him with a sisterly pat on the arm, her voice low and dripping with concern, like, Oh, Jay, this is something you should know? I put the blanket the couple had left in a tangled heap on the floor back on the bed, but decided to vacuum around the clothes that were strewn everywhere. Was true love really this messy? Wait a second, I thought as I picked up a still-damp towel with my thumb and forefinger and dropped it in the laundry bag. Had Jules been flirting with Jay? Oh my god, why hadn’t I thought of that earlier?

This wave of anger, just like every other, was dragged back out to sea when I remembered that her mother had died. Her mother. Died. Even though she drove me crazy sometimes, the thought of losing my own mother made me feel like I had a dry cleaning bag over my head. But still. What the hell had I done except try to be good, except offer to help, except try to be there for my best friend at the worst moment of her life?

I switched on the TV to give my mind a break. Liz said it was fine as long as Gavin was out and we kept the volume way down. I thought I’d stumbled onto some local Nantucket channel when I saw Bradley Lucas standing in front of a big Nantucket house. Isn’t that nice of Mr. Lucas, lending his talent to the local station, I thought as I bent to find the switch on the vacuum. But after a few seconds I realized this was no local TV station, but CNN. This was national news. As the shot widened, I saw other news vans in the background and a small crowd of people.

A banner ran at the bottom announcing the death of William “Boaty” Carmichael, the Massachusetts senator whose family vacationed here. He was famous for his boyish good looks and his weird nickname. He was also Parker’s uncle. He was around my parents’ age, with a baby face and blond curly hair. I remembered during one election season when my mother was driving me home from an away lacrosse game, somewhere near Boston. We passed a sign with Boaty Carmichael’s picture on it.

“I’d vote for him,” I said, prying some dirt from my cleats. “He’s so handsome.”

“That’s no reason to elect a person,” my mother said, a look of horror on her face. She saw a clump of dirt that had fallen from my cleat and added, “Stop that. This is my car, not a stable.”

“I still think he’s cute,” I said, releasing my foot to the floor and tossing the hunk of dirt out the window.

“Really, Cricket? I’m sending you to an all-girls’ school and you think it’s a good idea to vote for a man based on looks? Do you know anything about him? About his policies?” She stepped on the accelerator.

“Mom!” I said, gripping the door as the driver of a silver minivan slammed on her brakes to avoid hitting us. “That was a stop sign.”

Now I looked at the clip of him on the TV, shaking hands with the less handsome people of the world. He looked like such a great guy the way he made eye contact, smiling so vigorously his curls shook. As he leaned in to listen to a liver-spotted old lady, his blues eyes crinkled with friendliness.

“Liz, come here,” I said.

“What happened?” Liz looked around the room to see if I’d broken or spilled something.

“On the TV. Senator Carmichael died. Heart attack.”

“You’re kidding,” she said, and grabbed the remote off the quilt. She turned up the volume. “They’re out by the family compound. Poor Boaty.”

“You knew him?” With her swagger and that accent, Liz seemed capable of knowing senators, of knowing anyone she wanted to.

“He came here at least once a summer. Big muffin fan. Rhubarb was his favorite.” She shook her head. “What a shame. He has those two small children.” As if on cue, an old clip of the young family flashed on the screen, probably from the night he’d been elected. They were all dressed up and waving on a stage. I could see bits of Parker in them. I could see her toothy smile, the high cheekbones, and the big round eyes, all of which made the family seem part of a Disney movie. The Carmichael family possessed features that should have added up to beauty but somehow fell short. All except Boaty.

Now Parker and Jules would be more bonded than ever. I felt like curling up in the bed, pulling the sheets over my head, and taking a nap. And then I remembered that this was probably where the honeymooners were having sex all night long, so I leaned forward and put my head in my hands.

“Don’t take it so hard,” Liz said, patting my back. “His brother will surely take his place.”