He's After Me

Chapter SEVEN



Although I longed to fall in love, I always thought it was such a crazy, dangerous thing to do. A huge leap of faith. Like tombstoning. Maybe that’s the attraction. When you jump into it, you have no idea what lies beneath the surface. And once you’ve made that leap into the unknown, there’s no going back. It’s risky and scary and could so easily end in disaster.

But with Jem, it’s easy. I try to explain it to Zoe.

‘It’s like I’ve drifted off to sleep on a hot beach and found myself in some parallel-dream-world that I never knew existed.’

‘Cheesy!’ she says.

I know what I sound like. Sentimental. Smug. But I can’t help it. ‘Honestly, Zo, Jem is the perfect boyfriend. He’s good-looking, he’s romantic, he’s thoughtful …’

‘You hardly know him!’

‘Of course I know him. He’s so reliable, you wouldn’t believe. He even texts me if he’s going to be a few minutes late.’

‘He’s always texting you!’ My phone bleeps obligingly and she rolls her eyes.

It’s him. I read the message and smile to myself.

‘What does he say?’

‘He’s missing me.’

Zoe groans. ‘I can’t stand much more of this. It’s not fair. Has he got any mates?’

I shake my head. ‘Not that I know of.’

‘Come on, Anna, introduce me!’

‘He hasn’t,’ I say. It’s the truth. We’ve been going out together for weeks now and he’s never once introduced me to a friend. ‘He’s a bit of a loner. He seems to be happy just spending time with me.’

‘Lucky you,’ sighs Zoe.

‘I know I am.’ Lucky to have had the sense to choose someone who wants to be with me as much as I want to be with him. And who would never ever let me down. Not like poor Livi.

‘Ferret stood Livi up again last night,’ I say. ‘He’s a complete jerk.’

Zoe snorts. ‘I could’ve told her that in the first place.’

‘I did tell her that in the first place, but she wouldn’t listen. She’s finding it out for herself now though.’

Poor Livi is besotted with Ferret. She is completely at his beck and call and spends her life moping about for the next text, the next change of plan. It’s obvious to everyone but her that the little shit is backing off. I’m worried sick it’s because he’s got what he wanted. But I can’t ask her.

Maybe it’s not just luck that I chose the good guy. Maybe it’s judgement. Let’s face it, even when I was fourteen, I would never have fallen for Feral Boy. I’ve got too much pride.

Though, if I’m totally honest, I think it was Jem who chose me, not the other way round.

‘What’s he up to at the moment?’ asks Zoe. ‘Apart from ringing you up a couple of hundred times a day?’

‘Working on his portfolio,’ I start to explain but, right on cue, my phone rings again and Zoe rolls her eyes.

‘I can’t see you tonight,’ he says and my heart plummets. ‘I’ve got to work.’

‘OK.’

‘It’s not OK. It’s rubbish,’ he says and I can imagine his face, dark and scowling. ‘But it’s overtime. They’re paying me time and a half. I could do with the money.’

‘No problem.’

‘Shall I turn it down?’ he asks.

‘No way! I could do with a night in. I’ve got bags of work to do for college.’ It’s true actually. I’m seeing so much of Jem, my work is beginning to suffer.

And I know how much he needs the money.

Jem is a photography student in London. He’s down here for a while doing a project on the regeneration of the Docklands. To make ends meet, he works at the new hotel down there as a kitchen porter. Free accommodation, but he shares a room with two guys with smelly feet and a curry and lager habit.

‘I’ll make it up to you, I promise. We’ll go somewhere nice on my night off.’

‘Great. What are you doing now?’

‘Looking at photos.’

‘Of?’ I know the answer already but I want to hear him say it.

‘Some beautiful girl.’

Last night Jem was snapping away at me like the paparazzi. That’s what happens when your boyfriend is doing a photography degree. Forget about the docks, I’m his favourite subject.

I asked him why he chose the Docklands as a topic and he said it was because years ago he’d lived round here for a short time with his grandmother, while his mother was in prison for fraud.

His background is horrendous. Not that he goes on about it a lot. But sometimes it drip-feeds into the conversation and yet another terrible truth leaks out from his past.

The amazing thing is, he’s emerged from the chaos of his life completely sane. It puts into perspective all those excuses that are made for people’s conduct. You know, all the way through school, I heard allowances being made for disruptive behaviour. ‘He’s a bad lad but what can you expect?’ ‘Family like his, what chance has he got?’

Well, I’ve got news for you, it doesn’t have to be like that. No one could have had a more shambolic upbringing than Jem and he’s the nicest person I know.

‘You’re supposed to be taking photos of the docks, not me,’ I remind him.

He chuckles. ‘You’re more interesting. And better-looking.’

Right response. You’re so good for my self-esteem, Jem. I’m almost starting to believe it myself.