“Mom, just listen—I’m here for a . . . classmate . . . no, you don’t know her—she’s not pregnant! I don’t have a girlfriend. No, I didn’t have sex last night—I wish—kidding, kidding. Chill. I’m fine.
“She got into a car accident. I saw her car on my way to Costco—well, I didn’t move them, so I assume all of the groceries are still in the car, unless someone broke a window and stole everything—no one broke a window, Mom. Yeah, I’ll check later. Okay, I have to go—no, because people are starting to stare at me like I’m insane. Yeah, there are other kids from school here too—they’re all just getting here, school must have let out . . . no, I didn’t, I told you, I was asleep. I didn’t skip, Mom, I . . . overslept a bit. Yeah, pretty much. Until like, one thirty. I haven’t slept in ages, Mom. I was up until three the night before last night working on that stupid physics project. . . . Okay. Yeah, I’ll come home tonight. . . . Yeah, I know. I know. Sorry. Sorry. Yeah, okay. Love you too.”
CHAPTER TWENTY-EIGHT
The On-Again Off Again
Jake Derrick has not come to see Liz Emerson.
Liam realizes this after he hangs up with his mother and looks around. The waiting room resembles the high school during lunch hour. The cafeteria has a distinctive seating arrangement: the center tables belong to the popular, the outer rings to the nerds and outcasts and dorks and freshmen. Here in the waiting room, the jockiest and the preppiest, the ones who knew Liz the best, have taken over the center area with an air of manifest destiny.
Liam is still beside the window, undoubtedly the least popular person in the room.
But from his position, it’s easy to see everyone who comes and goes, and Liam is certain that Liz’s boyfriend has yet to arrive. It takes him a moment to remember whether or not they are, in fact, still together. Jake and Liz had established their tumultuous relationship at the end of Liz’s freshman year, and Liam has paid attention without meaning to. He can’t help it. His crush on Liz Emerson began on the first day of fifth grade, and except for the year or so during which he had hated her guts, he has paid attention.
No. Even then.
But the truth is, everyone pays attention. That’s why they were all here last night; that’s they’re all here now. She is Liz Emerson. She matters.
To everyone, it seems, except her boyfriend.
It started when Jake kissed her under the stars in the movie theater parking lot. He was a grade ahead of her, had made the varsity football team in his freshman year, and was widely lusted after. That night, he literally swept her off her feet. According to popular opinion, it was the most romantic thing that had happened all year. According to Liz, it was the definition of cliché, and he had tasted of nacho cheese.
Their most infamous breakup had taken place during sophomore year. It was the night of the homecoming game, and Liz dumped Jake right after he made the winning touchdown.
On the way to some party—Liz hadn’t even been sure whose it was, but it had alcohol and pot and people, so it didn’t matter, they were going—she told Julia and Kennie, “God, he’s just one big cliché.”
Jake Derrick is. He is decently hot but not nearly as hot as he thinks, and only about half as funny. He is not quite as stupid as everyone assumes, remains blissfully and utterly unaware of his own supreme arrogance, and will never, ever deserve Liz.
And certainly Liam is jealous, but he dislikes Jake because Liam is one of the few people who have paid attention closely enough to know that Liz does not like Jake either.
Liz and Jake’s favorite pastime is fighting. Jake is the kind of person who is absolutely assured of his own rightness, and Liz is the kind of person whose primary goal in life is to tear such people down. Their fights involved Jake calling Liz unmentionable things and Liz snapping back with comments that hurt where only she knew to hurt him.
Three days before Liz crashed her car, they started arguing about Liz’s physics project on gravity. Liz was almost done, and Jake was trying to make her feel stupid by saying some shit about how acceleration is the third derivative of position and telling her to change everything, and it turned nasty very quickly.
Eventually Jake called Liz a bitch and told her to fuck off and go to hell all in one breath, and Liz had laughed in his face and slammed the door behind him.
Liam does not know about the fight. He has no access to the best gossip, and it always takes awhile for news to trickle down to his lowly position among the other nerds and rejects.
It is true, however, that despite the fight, Liz and Jake never actually broke up. Technically. In the end, Liz simply did not want to waste any more time on Jake, even to dump him. She was searching for a reason to live, and he wasn’t helping.