Dancing for the Lord The Academy

Chapter Two

The drive to the Academy was long and quiet. Mr. Wilkerson had never been much of one for words; and while his daughter’s nerves might have been more settled if they had spend the miles in idle chatter, she also appreciated the time to herself, time in which she could begin to put her own thoughts in order again.

It was from her father, she knew, that she had developed her solitary nature. While her mother preferred to pray alongside others, both Danni and her father preferred quiet, peace, and oneness with the Lord. They knew that where two or three were gathered in the name of Jesus, He would always be there among them; and they both felt that there was a time and a place for that sort of worship. Private prayer, however, was intended to be exactly that, a time for contemplation that was shared only with God.

They were together on that long drive; but each of them took the time for their own thoughts as the miles flowed away. Danni had no idea what her father was thinking, but she bowed her head and gave herself over to God.

I know that this is going to be a good thing, God, she prayed silently. You’ve been sending me this way for a long time. I thank you for letting me in my junior year. Sure, I’m a couple of months behind, and that’s going to make it hard—but help me catch up fast, okay? Let me start my senior year with the advantages that most people get when they’re accepted to the Academy junior year. And Michael…Lord, let Michael be able to come in and get his classes out of the way in a hurry. I know it will be harder for him. He’s never been as good at academics as I am, but he’ll catch up soon enough—and he’s taking a lot of senior-level courses this year. They’d planned it that way on purpose, when they had thought that she wasn’t going to be going to the Academy. The fewer classes they had to worry about then, the less time they would have to take away from their dancing.

Then she had been accepted. That was the thing that Danni still didn’t believe—the thing that she probably wouldn’t believe until she was actually in her first dance class, in the familiar black leotard and pink tights, her pointe shoes on her feet.

And maybe not even then.

Thoughts of Michael, however, took her mind and her prayers in a completely different direction.

Lord…You alone know how much I’m going to miss Michael this next year. I know it’s probably Your plan that we be apart, but I’m not sure I know how to do anything without him. He’s been my best friend and my partner for so long; and out here, since I’m not coming with my partner, it might be a long time before I get to dance with anybody. Only the best girls will be given partners. They probably won’t even let me in partners class until senior year! Oddly, that thought, at least, was comforting. Danni wouldn’t have any idea what to do in a partners class without Michael; and on top of that, she would be missing him fiercely. At least if it was senior year before she got put in one, she would be able to wait for him.

On the other hand, dancing with a partner was one of her favorite things about ballet. She loved the way the music wrapped around them, carrying them through one phase of the dance and then another until they were so completely wrapped up in it and one another that it was impossible to tell which of them was leading and which was following.

God…it’s going to be hard, going without a partner. You know that given a choice, I would much rather dance a pas de deux than dance a solo. But You brought me here without Michael for a reason; and I trust You, God. Just…don’t let me be alone here, okay? Let me find a friend, someone who loves dance as much as I do…and let me find someone who loves You as much as I do. That was going to be one of the hardest things about her new world, Danni had no doubt. Her family had raised her to be a true Christian, her beliefs deeply enmeshed in her life. The world that she was entering now…well, saying that it wasn’t conducive to Christianity was a nice way of putting a deep-set fear.

Let me find someone to come alongside me, Lord, Danni prayed desperately, and knew that her God heard her plea. Let me find someone who understands what I do: that if the dance isn’t for You, it isn’t worth dancing.

Peace filled her. Everything would be all right, one way or the other. Danni wasn’t sure how she knew it; but as that peace flowed over her, she knew that everything that was happening was according to God’s plan. He had brought her here; He would take care of the rest of it, too. All she had to do was exactly as she had always done: dance, and give the rest to Him. As long as she gave Him everything she had, He would do his best for her in return. She would have the life God desired for her. She just had to trust.

Amazing, how fast the fear disappeared when she was willing to step out in faith. Amazing how different it was between one breath and the next, as though God had literally come to stand between her and that fear.

Danni smiled. He wouldn’t have taken away that fear if there were any reason for it to remain.

For several miles, she simply allowed her thoughts to flow where they would—one moment considering what was ahead of her, the next, remembering everything she had left behind. Lost in her own thoughts, she didn’t notice much of what was going on around her; but eventually, her father’s frequent glances in her direction became too obvious to ignore.

“What?” she demanded.

He looked surprised. “I’m not allowed to look at my daughter?” he teased.

“Of course you are.” She made a face at him. “Looking at me, sure. But looking at me like I’m about to start dancing in the middle of the truck or something…that, I’m not so sure about.”

“I’m not looking at you strangely!” he protested. “Just…looking. It might be awhile before I see you again, Danni-girl.”

“Uh-huh.” She folded her arms over her chest and waited for him to get around to telling her what he was really thinking.

Her father sighed. “I’ve been praying for you,” he admitted.

Danni wasn’t surprised. Her father had prayed for her for years. She was, however, curious. “What are you praying for?” she asked quietly.

He studied her for a moment as he pulled up to a red light, taking advantage of the time to look over her familiar face and see whether or not she would be receptive to this particular prayer. He had done that many times over the years, too—and sometimes, he chose not to tell her what he was praying for. “Two things,” he said at last, slowly. “First and foremost, that you will remain true to your faith; and second, that your dancing will always glorify God.”

Danni felt peace fill her at those words—peace even deeper than what she had gained from her own prayers. “It’s not going to be easy,” she admitted quietly. “Going to that place…being around all those other girls who are going to be gossipy and cruel…it’s not going to be easy to keep the faith.”

“No, it’s not.” Her father’s big hand covered hers for a moment. “But I have faith in you, Danni. You can get through this.” He smiled. “I wouldn’t have let you come to this school if I didn’t believe that.”

His praise warmed her. Danni knew what he was saying: that she had a faith strong enough to survive the trails ahead of her. As long as she kept leaning on God, everything would be all right in the end.

Easy words to say. Harder words to live by. As they pulled up outside the gates of Androv’s Ballet Academy, Danni felt a shiver run over her. This was it.

The campus, she knew from her previous visits here, was relatively small: several small houses that held the students’ rooms to the right-hand side; the school itself in the center; a small library and huge theater over on the left. Toward the back of the property was the setup for camp over the summer: a huge outdoor amphitheater, several smaller buildings where campers could stay, and a large common room contained under a single roof. During the school year, she’d been told, most of that saw little use; but the campers appreciated having their own space during the summer.

Danni couldn’t remember the purpose of the other smaller buildings. She could barely remember where the school was. Suddenly, her palms were sweating, her lips were dry, and she wished that she could go back in time to the day she had put in her application and…well, not, came to mind. It wasn’t that she didn’t appreciate the opportunity that she had been given. This was everything she’d ever wanted, and Danni at least had enough sense to know that. It was just….

It was all so….

Big.

Intimidating.

Larger than life.

Her father reached over and patted her hand as he pulled up outside the large house that would be her home for the next two years. “This is it,” he told her gently.

Right. This was it. She ought to get out and start her new life.

So why was she sitting in the car, staring up at the house as though she had never seen once before?

“Come on, Danni-girl,” her father said gently. “It’s not going to get any more familiar from you sitting here and staring at it.” He put actions to those words, climbing out of his seat and reaching into the back of the truck to grab the first of her bags. “Grab one of these and come on.”

He didn’t give her a choice. Part of Danni was grateful for that as she slowly climbed up the front steps, her dance bag thrown over her shoulder. Funny, how that was the one she had grabbed instinctively. She hadn’t even thought about reaching for one of the other bags, or one of the boxes of books. No, she wanted her dance bag over her shoulder. That familiar weight was a comfort.

“Well, here you are!” The front door of the house was thrown open, and a warm, comfortable-looking woman enveloped Danni in a huge hug. “I was beginning to think that you weren’t going to get here! Was the drive difficult?”

“No, the drive was just fine,” Mr. Wilkerson said quickly. “We were just driving along, enjoying the scenery. You know how it is.”

“Oh, I do.” She winked. “And wonderful that you took the time to do it now. Why, Danni here might not even see the outside of the grounds for weeks!”

“I thought as much.” Her father grinned. “But of course, she’s eager to start looking around, see where she’s going to be living.” He faked a grimace. “Truth be told, I’m a bit eager for that, myself. All these bags of hers, you know.”

Danni made a face at him. The bags weren’t that heavy—but her father was right, now that she was here, she did want to see her bedroom.

“Oh, of course!” The woman smiled broadly. “Now, I’m Mrs. Baxter, dear. I’ll be your house mother for the next two years, as long as you stay here—and there’s not usually a lot of moving around. Too much trouble, you see.”

Danni could believe it. Moving once was trouble enough; she couldn’t see going to that much effort just to change dorms.

“Now, Danni, you’ll be on the second floor, first room on the right. I’m afraid it’s the smallest in the house—the other girls have already had their pick, you see—but I think it’ll serve you well enough.”

“Thank you.” Danni was afraid that her voice emerged as a squeak. Shrugging that off—it wouldn’t do her any good to dwell on it, after all—she followed Mrs. Baxter over to the stairs.

“I’m just going to see if any of the boys are here tonight.” Mrs. Baxter’s eyes sparkled. “They can make themselves useful and carry some of those bags, hm?”

Danni just nodded, too overwhelmed to protest as she should have, and made her way up the stairs with her father right behind her.

Mrs. Baxter had been right: the room was one of the smaller ones. While most of the rooms were at least twice the size of her room back home—with enough space, the girl who had shown her around commented, to at least stretch out and warm up in the mornings—this one was only a quarter again that size, and a great deal of that space was taken up by the full-sized bed, desk, and dresser. Two slender bookshelves covered what wall space wasn’t taken up by several large windows; looking around, Danni realized that there wasn’t really any good place to put posters, especially since she planned to put another shelf over the desk.

On the other hand, the small room felt cozy, Danni thought. In a bigger room, she would have felt like she was rattling around in all the space. It was strange enough that at a boarding school, girls would get rooms to themselves. The materials the Academy had sent home had indicated that this was to help with adjustments and to prevent rivalries from developing in quarters so close that they couldn’t get away from one another. Every student at least had their own private space.

The room was also beautiful, Danni thought. Sheer curtains hung in front of the windows, dancing merrily in the breeze from the vent; a gorgeous, rose-colored comforter covered the bed; and there was a cozy, rose-colored chair in the corner that looked just perfect for curling up in with a good book. The more she studied it, the more she found to like. And…yes, those were blackout curtains hanging alongside the gauzy ones, so that if she wanted to block out the sun, she would be able to do so.

Not, Danni thought, that she expected to have a great many opportunities to sleep in, not with the new life that she had ahead of her.

Her father dropped the bags he carried on the ground and looked around. “Well, it’s not too bad, Danni-girl,” he said lightly.

She turned, letting him see her smile. “I love it!” she declared.

“I’m glad.” He squeezed her arm. “Why don’t you start unpacking while I bring the rest up, hm?”

Danni didn’t argue with him. Her father was the old-fashioned sort, believed that women should let their men do the heavy lifting; he would be insulted if she implied by so much as the flicker of an eyelash that he couldn’t handle it, and anyway, she wanted to start making her mark on the place.

The first thing she did was tuck her dance bag down beside the reading chair. That, she thought, was probably where it would stay. The closet, as she studied it, didn’t look big enough for her to use it for the bag; probably she would end up burying it under something and being late to class. Next, she reached for the bag her father had brought up—not so incidentally the last one she had packed that morning. She tossed her own pillows onto the bed, pulled her Bible and devotional book out and tucked them into place on the nightstand, and plugged in the charger for her cell phone. Her room, she’d noticed, shared a bathroom with the room next door; her toothbrush and toothpaste, as well as her shower bag, went in there.

There were towels already in the bathroom and under the sink, she noticed—the Academy did provide those for students’ use, just as they provided sheets and other bed coverings—but her mother had sent her with her own anyway. As she unpacked one bag after another, Danni found herself making a couple of trips to the bathroom with a stack of towels, her extra toiletries—her mother was terrified that she would run out of something important and not have time to go get it, so she’d packed what looked to Danni like enough of everything to get her through to the summer—and her bag of hair things. Danni’s hair, when it was unbound, reached about halfway down her back. While she expected to spend most of her time here with it in a bun, she also hoped that there would be opportunities to wear it down, at least every once in awhile.

Then there were the sheets her mother had sent from home. Danni considered putting them on the bed then and there; but she had the feeling that the bed had been made up just for her, and she didn’t want to hurt anyone’s feelings. She left everything where it was and put the rest up in the closet, telling herself that she would change the sheets out in a week or so, when she started to get really homesick.

As she began unpacking the box of books her father had brought up, Danni had the uncomfortable sensation that someone was watching her. She turned to find someone peering out of the bathroom.

“Hi!” the girl said, grinning brightly at her. “You must be Danni. I’m Madalyn—I have the room through the bathroom.” She gestured behind her enthusiastically. “It must be so crazy, getting here in the middle of the semester and all—but don’t worry, people will be helpful, I think. Or I’ll be helpful, anyway. Besides, I don’t think we’ll be competing a lot. I’m much taller than you.”

Taller than her Madalyn might be, Danni thought wryly, but the girl definitely seemed to be a bundle of energy. “It’s nice to meet you,” she said tentatively.

“Oh, it’s great to meet you, too!” Madalyn bubbled. “I really hope we’re going to get to be friends. Rachel—that’s the girl who had the room before you—didn’t like me very much; but I don’t think it was fair of her to say so.” She made a face. “She was only here for a few weeks, you know? And then Helen quit, and Rachel jumped at the chance to have her room. She said it was horrible, not having enough space.” She rolled her eyes. “Personally, I think this room is much nicer. Mine’s not all that much bigger, and I picked it on purpose. We’ve got a great view, you know.” She gestured out the windows, finally stopping to take a breath.

“It’s beautiful here,” Danni admitted.

“I think they want it to inspire us.” Madalyn grinned. “Dance in the beauty of the mountains and all.”

“It’s got to be amazing,” Danni said quietly. “Being able to dance right here, under the clear evidence of God’s majesty.”

Madalyn nodded, but she was silent long enough that Danni knew immediately that she had thrown her for a loop. “You’re a Christian, huh?” Danni nodded. “Me, too. I mean, I’m not just crazy about it or anything, but I pray, and I believe in God.”

Danni turned away to hide her wince. “My parents raised me to put God first,” she said simply. “And to worship Him in everything I do. When I dance, I dance for Him.”

Madalyn was quiet even longer that time. When she did speak, her voice was oddly wistful. “I wish I had that,” she admitted. “But me…I just dance.”

“There’s no shame in that,” Danni said quickly. The last thing she wanted was to make the other girl feel badly, especially on first acquaintance. “It’s just…not the way I’ve ever done it. God calls us all to different things, right?”

“Right.” Madalyn looked more cheerful at that. “Hey, do you think you’ll get to dance Helen’s part in the Christmas performance? It’s just The Nutcracker, but it could be fun. We were doing snowflakes together.”

“That sounds like fun.” Danni grinned. “I’ve been in The Nutcracker for the last five years, with the company back home.”

“Wow.” Madalyn’s eyes were wide, awed. “I never danced in a real ballet before I came here. Just recital stuff, you know? And I’ve never done any partner work—but that doesn’t happen until senior year anyway, not unless you’re really good at it.”

If I had Michael here, I’d be in partners classes. Danni thought it; but she didn’t want to say it to this bubbling girl. “Seems a shame,” she said instead, slowly. “I think we ought to be able to dance with a partner at least a little bit.”

“Oh, well.” Madalyn shrugged. “There aren’t enough guys to go around, you know—never are. It’s just more fair this way.”

“Right,” Danni agreed quickly. “And hey, next year, right?” Next year…when I have Michael here, and we can really show them what we can do.

“Oh, yeah.”

“Well, Danni-girl, I think that’s the last of it.” Her father set down the last box very carefully. He had carried them up slowly, she’d noticed—far more slowly than he really had to. He was stalling, prolonging the inevitable moment when he would have to say goodbye.

He couldn’t stall anymore.

She carefully placed the last of the books she was holding in the shelves, pleased to note that she had filled them up just enough without overcrowding them. She even had a little shelf for her schoolbooks, once she had them—because classes at the Academy ran like college classes, with one set on Mondays and Wednesdays and a whole different set on Tuesdays and Thursdays.

There were no academic classes on Fridays. Those, Danni had learned, were reserved entirely for dance…unless there was a reason for a special academic class.

She was determined not to let there be a reason, not unless it was simply that she needed an extra slot in order to finish things up fast enough.

“Well.” Her father dusted his hands on his jeans. “Who’s your friend? Are you going to introduce me?”

Stalling. Danni appreciated it. She smiled. “This is Madalyn.”

Madalyn bounded into the room, holding out her hand; Mr. Wilkerson shook it warmly. “It’s nice to meet you, sir,” she told him.

“It’s nice to meet you, as well.” He cleared his throat uncomfortably.

Madalyn seemed to take it as a hint. “Well, I’ll just, um….” She shrugged, then bounded through the bathroom and the connecting door. Before either of the Wilkersons could gather themselves to acknowledge her, she was gone again.

Neither of them wanted to look at the other—to admit that this was it, the inevitable parting that they had, in a sense, been preparing for all day.

Danni didn’t want her father to leave. This last goodbye was harder than all the others put together—the last member of her family finally disappearing. “You could stay for dinner,” she suggested desperately.

“I don’t think that would be a good idea, sweetheart.” Her father cleared his throat again, doing his best to be done with the lump so that she wouldn’t hear the huskiness in his voice as he spoke. “You need to start settling in here; and you won’t be able to do that with me hanging around all afternoon.”

“Yeah, but—“ she began.

“Danni.” He tipped her chin up so that she could look him in the eye. “Don’t worry, honey. Christmas will be here before you know it, and you can come home for a couple of days then.”

“The Christmas production,” she began.

“Doesn’t run over Christmas proper. I already checked.” He brushed a few strands of her hair behind her ear, smiling sadly. “Though you’ve only got a couple of days. I guess you won’t want to spend them all in the car, will you?” The words were sad.

“It’s not going to be an easy couple of years, Dad,” she reminded him softly. “We knew that when we started.”

“I know.” He bowed his head for a moment. “Doesn’t make it any easier to let you go.”

“I want this.” She was saying it as much to remind herself as she was to remind him.

“And we want it for you.” Still, he didn’t look at her, and Danni wondered if that side-turned face was hiding tears.

“Summer. Summer will be here in no time.” She swallowed hard. “And you know Mom will drag you up here for the first parents’ weekend on the schedule.”

“Right.” Her father’s voice was gruff; he was trying not to show any more emotion, particularly distress. “And you’ll…you’ll be….” He couldn’t keep up the charade. His voice faltered. “Take care, Danni-girl,” he told her. “And remember, every time you dance, make sure you remember who you’re dancing for.”

“I will, Daddy.” She stepped forward into his arms, embracing him tightly. “Pray for me?”

“Every morning,” he promised. “Just like I always have.”

There was strength in that, Danni knew. Simply knowing that her father would go to his knees for her at need had always been enough to warm her no matter how dark the problem might have seemed.

And he was right. Christmas wasn’t that far away. Surely she’d be able to spend a couple of days with her family then. It wasn’t as though they were that far away. Just a few hours, really; her father had already proved that the drive wasn’t that bad. He was even going to be making it back today—though it would be late by the time he got home.

“Be safe,” she told him. They exchanged one last hug, and then he was gone, leaving Danni alone with her new life.

Alone…and yet not. Before the front door of the house had even closed behind him, Danni heard a tentative knock at that connecting door again.

“You want some help unpacking?” Madalyn offered.

For a moment, Danni considered turning her down. The way she had asked, the other girl probably wouldn’t be offended if she told her that she had it handled, and she’d rather do it herself. After all, if someone else unpacked for her, she might never be able to find whatever had been in the boxes!

On the other hand, Danni knew what she would do if she was left to her own devices: she would brood. She would miss her parents, she would miss Michael…if she let herself go long enough, she might even find herself missing Lizzie!

Normally, she relished time alone, using mundane activities like unpacking her bags as an opportunity to spend some time in prayer. On this particular evening, however, Danny knew full well that she wouldn’t be praying. No, she would probably just brood—and that wasn’t exactly healthy.

So she smiled at Madalyn, and forced herself to sound like she meant it when she said, “I’d appreciate that.”