Between the Land and the Sea

Chapter TWENTY

THANKSGIVING

The atmosphere at school changed on Monday. It was a short week for everyone, and the air was charged with anticipation of a long break from the routine. Most classes scheduled midterm exams before the fall break, and I tried to focus on my schoolwork despite the lack of sleep that was grinding me down to a nub. Shuffling around campus in a trance-like state, I found myself drifting away, escaping into daydreams about swimming and surfing.

Ethan returned to art class, but I usually stumbled in late and was able to avoid having to sit by him. I was hurt by the way he had so easily turned his back on me, and all the friendliness and affection between us had vaporized. I focused the energy I had left on making it through until Wednesday, planning on trying to sleep during the day over the break. Mr. Briggs kept casting worried looks my way.

Tuesday night I woke up in the middle of moving the desk away from the door, which terrified me. Frantic, I sat up with the lights on until dawn, afraid to lie back down. I could sense that the barricade wasn’t going to work much longer. Forces pulled at me from the depths of the sea. Something powerful was taking control of my dreams.

It felt as though I was becoming a zombie, numbly wandering the halls with a growing sense of detachment. I was so tired I barely noticed Ethan follow me into art class. He slid into the seat next to me, and his leg kept brushing against mine. I felt like he was playing a cruel game, and I moved my chair as far away as I could in a fog of confusion and sadness. I couldn’t deal with one more thing. There was an art history slide show on our last day, and I fell asleep at my desk, overcome by exhaustion.

I was being pulled underwater, looking up to see the bottom of a boat grow smaller and smaller until it disappeared. I was crying, filled with unbearable sorrow, and it occurred to me that the whole ocean was made up of salty tears.

I woke up with Ethan’s hand on my shoulder, gently shaking me awake. The classroom had emptied out, and Mr. Briggs was shuffling papers at his desk. I bolted up, wiping my wet cheeks, and blindly groped for my purse.

“Are you alright?” Ethan asked, a panicked sound in his voice.

“I’m fine,” I said curtly, avoiding eye contact and rising to go.

“Have a nice Thanksgiving break,” Mr. Briggs called out as I passed his desk.

“Thanks, you too,” I said, looking down as I hurried by.

“And get some sleep!” he called after me.

Ethan chased me out to the parking lot, trying to get my attention, “Marina –” I sped up, pretending I didn’t hear, hoping he’d leave me alone.

He came up alongside me, “Marina?” his tone was softer.

I slowly turned, looking up at him suspiciously, “What?” I asked coldly.

“Please, I want to talk...” he said.

“This isn’t a good time,” I shook my head, overcome with fatigue.

“I’m worried about you,” he said, searching my eyes.

I was running out of the ability to resist, “Talk,” I said, trying not to come unraveled on the spot, only sheer stubbornness keeping me from breaking down into a sobbing heap.

“Let me drive you home,” he said, a pleading look in his blue eyes. I couldn’t look away. I felt weak, ashamed for being such a pushover. I reached into my purse for my keys.

“Fine,” I said almost inaudibly, “Can you give these to Cruz?” I was in no mood to explain anything to anybody.

Ethan jogged over to Cruz as I walked to his truck. He raced back, beating me to the door and opening it, watching as I climbed in.

He slid in behind the wheel, “Can we please go somewhere to talk?” he asked with hopeful eyes.

I looked down, not sure I wanted to deal with what he had to say, “I guess.” He took me to a park in the woods, far away from the seashore. We drove down a rutted gravel road, deeper and deeper into the trees. It was cool and dark under the towering redwoods and I thought about the depths of the ocean. The air was scented with bay leaves, moss and plants growing in moist soil. The damp woodsy smell brought me back to reality, and my head began to clear a little bit.

He parked the truck and turned to me, “Can we go for a walk?” he asked.

I followed him down a narrow path that led to a small stream, wondering what he was up to.

There were some boulders along the water’s edge and Ethan sat down on one, looking up at me frankly.

“I’m sorry,” he said sincerely, “I’ve been a jerk. I’m sorry I got so upset. Would you please sit down?” he gestured to a spot next to him. I pointedly sat on a rock further away from him, looking down into the clear flowing water.

“Marina, I just can’t handle dishonesty. I probably... overreact.” I squeezed my eyes shut, “I didn’t mean to... you don’t understand how much... how hard it’s been,” I swallowed the lump in my throat and looked over at him with tired eyes, fighting back tears.

“Why?” he asked, “Why don’t you trust me?”

“I do trust you. I didn’t intend to lie.” I looked down, “Things changed...”

“How?” he asked.

I didn’t want to talk about it anymore. He was just going to tell me what to do. He would tell me to stay away from them, when I knew that was no longer an option.

I stood up, “Can you please take me home now?” I asked, too weary to argue about it.

He looked upset, “What’s happening?”

I heaved an exhausted sigh, “I can’t sleep anymore. I’ve been... having weird dreams. I think I’m being forced to... I just don’t know!” A tear escaped from my eye and I wiped it away angrily. It was easier to be angry.

He got up and came over to stand next to me, “I want to help,” he said.

I shook my head no, “There’s nothing you can do. I can’t help it. I can’t stop it. I feel like I’m going crazy.”

He moved closer, and then gingerly put his arms around me, “I feel exactly the same way about you,” he said.

I tensed, holding my breath for a few seconds, and finally exhaled, letting go, leaning onto him and giving in to the sensation. He pulled me close into him and we stood like that for a few long minutes. I closed my eyes and sighed with relief, letting him hold me up against his warm chest. I hadn’t relaxed for so long it was a strange feeling, but touching him soothed me like nothing I’d ever known.

His voice rumbled in my ear, “I talked with Lue Khang at the market on Sunday. He said I was lucky to know you. He said you had the heart of a lion– that all you wanted to do was protect me.”

“They’re not after you,” I mumbled.

“But they’re after you?” he asked.

“No,” I said automatically, “I mean... I don’t know.”

I realized Megan was right. My first impulse was always to keep things to myself. I never wanted to trouble my father with problems, so I just dealt with anything that came up on my own. With Evie I had no problems, for she possessed the preternatural ability to anticipate my every need and heal every hurt. I suddenly missed her acutely.

He paused for a moment, “It’s stupid really, I’ve been trying to stay away from you because I’m afraid of getting too... involved. I can’t stop thinking about how you’re just gonna move away next summer anyway. I’ve been feeling terrible all week.”

“Me too,” I said quietly.

“I’m sorry,” he whispered, his voice vibrating along my spine. He pulled back my hair and laid his cheek against mine, “I just need to be as brave as you are.”

“I’m so tired. I don’t think I can take much more.” I was thinking about the sleepwalking.

“I’m sorry...” He pressed his lips against my neck. My heart started racing and I was having a hard time catching my breath. I pulled away abruptly, afraid to look him in the eye, afraid of losing control. “I better get you home,” he said.

We arrived at the house to find Cruz and Megan sitting on the porch.

“I’ll see you tomorrow,” he said, leaning over to kiss my cheek. Cruz stood up, watching Ethan pull away.

“What was that all about?” he asked, bemused, “He looked so serious– we thought you were being kidnapped!”

“Nothing,” I said gravely, “He just wanted to tell me how much he was looking forward to tofu turkey.”

Cruz laughed so suddenly he choked. I turned to Megan, “Will you be joining us?”

“No, me and my mom are going to my aunt’s in San Jose.” She sighed wistfully, “There won’t be any tofu, but we’ll just have to get by...”

“Shut up!” Cruz said, his eyes watering. Megan had to leave, so I walked her out to her car.

“You look better,” she said knowingly, “What did he say?” I pressed my lips together, “You were right. He apologized.” Megan smiled victoriously, “Have a happy Thanksgiving! And avoid the murderous mermaids, okay?”

“I’ll do my best,” I said, smiling wanly.

I ventured in the kitchen where I was met by the sight of Abby cooking up a storm. I offered to help but she pushed me out, saying she had everything under control. I arranged to pick up a veggie pizza for dinner and she smiled gratefully.

“Does Dutch know that there won’t be any turkey?” I asked wryly.

“Yes,” she said with mock exasperation, “He said he likes the side dishes best anyway. Now scoot!”

That night I was actually able to sleep a little, and I wondered if it was because of my contact with Ethan. I only started awake once, finding myself standing at the window in the moonlight with my hands on the sill. I locked it, wedging a stick in the frame to keep it from opening. I wondered if I’d be able to climb out of it without waking myself up.

On Thanksgiving morning I helped Abby clean up the house and set the table. Dutch and Ethan showed up a little early, bearing flowers. I got them both something to drink and sat them down on the couch, putting a football game on. Abby bustled around in the kitchen, arranging the bouquet in a vase and nervously fussing with her veggie gravy.

I excused myself and went to go see what Cruz was up to. I knocked on his door and peeked in, finding him hunched over his sewing machine as usual. He was working on a confection of a dress.

“Cruz! It’s fabulous!” I admired it as he held it up for me. The bodice and skirt were a deep garnet satin, with a wide neckline and lace half sleeves. An overlay of golden blonde lace had been hand applied along the hemline, and it was draped beautifully. It had the look of expensive handmade couture, and it was definitely something Evie would wear and look beautiful in.

“Do you really think she’ll love it?” he asked hopefully. “Can we take it up to her this weekend?” I told Cruz that Evie was visiting friends in New York for Thanksgiving, but I thought she was coming back on Sunday.

“I’ll call and find out when we can go,” I promised, “Now we should get out there and be good hosts!”

Cruz groaned, “Ugh! Football! Give me five minutes.”

I went out to sit with Ethan and his dad. It wasn’t nearly as awkward as I thought it would be. Dutch teased me about my barbering skills and we all shared a laugh about how some of the surfer dudes went out and got the same haircut.

“You know what they say about the sincerest form of flattery!” Dutch chuckled.

Cruz finally pried himself away from his workbench to join us. I told Ethan about the dress Evie had commissioned from him.

“We might go up to the city for a fitting this week,” I said.

“Will you be coming back with a new car?” Ethan teased me. Cruz knew a lot about luxury cars and started describing Evie’s garage in detail. The guys listened with interest. I was happy they found some common ground, even if it bored me to tears. Abby called us in to eat, and we all gathered around the table.

The food was pretty good, although the tofu turkey remained largely untouched. Abby and Dutch were completely focused on each other, and as smitten as he was, I’m sure Dutch would have eaten anything she put in front of him. Even Cruz was well behaved, refraining from any of his usual vegan jokes.

Dutch asked Abby if she’d like to come out on his boat with him the next night. The harbor hosted a lighted boat parade to kick off the holiday season and Abby said she’d always wanted to see it. Ethan caught my eye and smiled. After dinner, Abby and Dutch settled down on the couch with a glass of wine while the rest of us cleaned up.

The three of us sat at the table, and Cruz told us how he had contacted the attorney for his father’s estate. He’d been left a considerable sum, almost enough to cover his entire design school tuition. He discovered that he had two older sisters in Argentina, and they were interested in meeting him.

“They want me to come for a visit,” he said, “I better study harder in Spanish class!”

“That’s great Cruz!” I patted his hand, “I knew everything would work out alright.”

“Things have been looking up ever since you moved here,” he replied, getting up and squeezing my shoulders, “I need to go work on that dress.” Cruz went back to his sewing, leaving me and Ethan sitting awkwardly in the kitchen, not wanting to intrude on the happy couple in the other room.

“Do you want to take a walk down to the beach?” I asked.

“OK, but no swimming,” he said teasingly.

We walked down the stairs slowly, and he reached over to take hold of my hand. He asked me if I wanted to come to see the lighted boat parade too, promising to avoid his dad and Abby.

“We can watch it from the docks,” he said. I agreed, and we planned to meet at his house at sunset.

I asked if he’d been out surfing since the accident, and he admitted that he’d snuck a few sessions in before he had the doctor’s permission. He was eager to get back into practice, and remembering how much fun it was made me miss it too. He told me about an upcoming competition he was planning to enter. Big waves came along with the winter storms, and he was hoping to collect some prize money to put towards the land he was buying from Lue.

It was a cool outside, with pink and gold clouds reflecting the sun as it sank towards the horizon. There were a few people here and there strolling on the beach, no doubt walking off their turkey dinner. Twilight was darkening the sky overhead to a deep iris blue as we picked our way across the sand towards the pier. I spotted a familiar silhouette fishing off the side.

“There’s Lue Khang,” I said.

We walked up the stairs and down the pier to the spot where Lue was fishing. He looked up at us, amused.

“Hi Lue,” I returned his smile.

I leaned against the railing as Ethan and Lue started discussing some business with the farm.

Staring off into the distance, I could see the last long rays of the sun glittering off of the sea. I glanced over to catch Lue’s gaze. He nodded his head towards the fish bucket and looked away.

It was full, and I knew what that meant.

I excused myself and hurried down the pier towards the cement boat. If she was here I couldn’t miss the opportunity to speak to her. I had questions about what was happening to me that simply couldn’t wait. I looked up to see Ethan walking along beside me. He reached over and slipped his arm around my waist.

“I’m not about to let you out of my sight around here,” he said, looking down at me with a smile.

I stopped, “I think she’s here now,” I said intensely, looking out towards the shipwreck,

“And I have to talk with her… It’s a matter of life or death.” The smile faded from his face.

“Fine,” he said gravely, taking my hand, “but you’re not getting near the water.”

“Believe me, I’m not planning on it.”

We got to the end of the ship and I could see the sea lions bobbing in the surf. I looked around to make sure we were alone before calling out for Lorelei. Ethan stood by my side, holding my hand tightly as though he thought I might fly away. Her head popped up almost immediately, and I saw her looking at Ethan nervously, deciding whether to leave or not.

“Wait! Lorelei! Don’t go,” I cried.

She swam back and forth hesitantly. When her eyes met mine she smiled brilliantly. With one powerful thrust of her tail she launched herself out of the water onto one of the flat slabs of cement. Her scales glistened golden in the waning rays of the sun; her skin was almost iridescent.

There was something wild and powerful about her, like the ocean she came from. Ethan gripped my hand harder and pulled me closer to him.

“Marina! Come into the water, ” she beckoned me to her, “We want you with us.”

“I can’t... ” I looked over my shoulder to see if anyone was coming, “Come closer, I want to talk. ” She flipped into the air and dove gracefully into the water. For a moment I thought she was gone, but she suddenly reappeared within inches of my face, just on the other side of the chain link.

“Lorelei, who was that other sister and why did you fight? ” She looked over at Ethan and smiled, beautiful and feral, free of any guile.

“It’s the wave rider, he’s a nice one, ” she said.

“Lorelei! I need to know what happened that day at the buoy.” She nodded, facing me, “She did not know you were a sister. She wants you to come with us too. We have something for you. ”

“What? ” I asked.

“It was your mother’s. It is your birthright. ” She held her webbed hand flat against the fence. I impulsively put my free hand up to hers. Ethan’s grip on me tightened.

“What is it? ”

“The powers of the moon and the tide, and all of your sisters, ” she said in her singsong voice, “You won’t be too cold anymore! ”

“What powers? ”

“Come with me, ” she motioned for me to join her again, tilting her neck enticingly.

“But why? ” I asked.

“Marina, ” she nodded her beautiful head, her eyes sparkling, “Just come with me and you will know. ” She lunged off the fence in one fluid motion and dove backwards into the water like an acrobat. The sea lions all started barking.

When it became clear she was gone I stepped back and looked up at Ethan. He was staring at me in awe. “My God Marina,” he said slowly, “You were out in the middle of the ocean with two of them?”

I pulled my hand back from him and rubbed it, trying to restore the circulation. “You didn’t believe me,” I said with a frown, feeling hurt.

“No… I did. It’s just that hearing about it and seeing it are two different things.”

“Ethan,” I asked, “What did she sound like to you?”

He looked freaked out. “Let’s get out of here,” he said, taking back my hand and pulling me away from the boat. He hurried me off the pier and over to the stairs, keeping my hand in an iron grip. When we got halfway up the stairs we stopped on the landing overlooking the beach. Ethan sat on the bench, pulling me down to join him.

“I owe you an apology,” he said, looking at me with wide eyes in the darkening gloom. “I had no idea what you were up against. She looked so... strong... and so much like you. It’s obvious you’re related. What did she say?”

I frowned, “You didn’t tell me what she sounded like to you.”

“I don’t know,” he said, “It sounded like waterfalls, or water running over rocks.”

“And me?” I asked.

He looked me in the eyes as if he were seeing her again, “The same.”

“It’s official,” I dropped my head to my hands, “I’m a freak of nature.”

“Stop that,” he said, rubbing my back, “Tell me what you said to each other.” I stood up and leaned on the rail, looking down at the beach.

“I asked her what they were fighting about that day. She said that the other one didn’t know about my mother. I guess they’re not supposed to be with people,” my voice trailed off.

“What else?” he prodded.

“She said they had something for me... she was talking about the moon and the tide. I don’t know– it was confusing. She said it was my birthright and I wouldn’t be cold anymore…” I paused for a moment, thinking I sure wouldn’t feel cold if I was dead.

Ethan stood and came up close behind me, his hands on the rail, arms on either side of me,

“What else?” he asked quietly in my ear.

“She said I needed to go with her to find out.”

“Marina...” his voice was husky. I turned to look up at him and he took my face between his hands. “Tell them no,” he said, “Tell them they can’t have you... I need you.” He bent down and kissed me softly on the lips. My knees wobbled and he reached around to pull me to face him. I kissed him back harder and held onto him like I was drowning. I looked down and buried my face in his chest.

“I don’t want to go with them,” I said into his shirt, thinking about how close I’d come.

“Just don’t,” he said, lips brushing my cheek.

I turned my face up for another kiss, wishing it was that simple. It was getting to be pretty clear that the decision wasn’t entirely up to me.

We walked back slowly, arms wrapped around each other. We stopped at the top of the stairs for more kisses, clinging together tightly. It felt so good to be pressed up against him I forgot all about my problems for a few minutes. My head was spinning and my cheeks were flushed.

When we walked in the door I was sure Abby would notice something different about us, but we found her and Dutch even more flustered than we were. Dutch got up and thanked Abby, telling her to come by early so they could take the boat out. We walked the guys out the door and watched them drive away.

“That went well,” said Abby with a big glowing grin, “Dutch has really good energy.”

“Yeah,” I couldn’t help but return her smile even as I started worrying about the night ahead. Abby gave me a joyful hug and practically floated off to bed.

I was in a darker place as I repositioned my furniture, afraid I might drown myself in my sleep. Now I was certain that they were calling me to them, and I was pretty sure that if they got me into the water I wouldn’t be getting out alive. I prayed to be allowed to get some rest, but I kept my clothes on just in case. Despite my fear of facing the night ahead I was feeling excited, looking forward to seeing Ethan again.

I drifted off to sleep, thinking about the way his lips felt on mine.