how annoyed were you that I was going to the dance with
someone else?
Infinity.
C H A P T E R S E V E N T E E N
It’s funny how quickly your opinion of a dance can change.
I always thought the idea of a winter dance was silly. It
was only three months after homecoming and three months
before prom — did we really need another reason to fret over
dates, dresses, and the drama that follows such occasions?
But when a cute college guy asked me to go? Well, who was
I to stand in the way of tradition? Plus, we all know how
much I loved my distractions.
Alex took me out to eat the weekend before the dance. It
was a nice change to have a guy pick me up instead of my
having to constantly take Levi around. While I was more
than happy to help him out, it was still a chore.
I kept glancing over my menu at Alex. He was only a couple inches taller than me, but he was lean, with broad
shoulders, dark hair, and dark eyes — almost the exact opposite of Levi. I couldn’t understand why he would want to hang
out with me, a high school girl.
“Hey.” Alex smiled at me. “Do you remember when we were
little and we went up to Door County with our moms?”
259
My heart warmed at the memory. Our moms had been
really close. So, in a way, Alex was my first guy friend. My
warm-up to Levi.
“Yes, but as I remember, you weren’t that excited to be
hanging out with a girl. Ew!” I scrunched up my face.
“That’s because I was an idiot.”
I did remember that week in Door County when I was six
and Alex was eight. We’d gone swimming, went for walks
among the cherry trees, and picked our own cherries — our
hands and mouths stained red, our bellies full.
“I remember your mom had this huge hat.” He held his arms out wide. “That hat was epic.”
That hat. I can still picture her in that black and white striped hat. It flopped nearly over her shoulders.
“Well, Mom and I have the same pasty white skin tone.
Don’t you remember how burned I got?”
“Yes!” He shook his head. “Your mom took you outside and
sprayed you with vinegar.”
“That stung so much! But it was better the next day.” I’d
smelled for a bit, but once the vinegar had evaporated from
my skin, it hadn’t been so awful. “Mom had some strange
home remedies, but they worked.”
Alex looked at me thoughtfully. “Is it okay that we talk
about her?”
“Of course.” I knew it would be a disservice if I didn’t celebrate the time I’d had with her.
At least that was the attitude I tried to have. I still would
have my moments when I’d get sad. But I would’ve been worried if that hadn’t happened.
260
Alex got quiet. “I’m sorry we didn’t hang out much after.”
Alex’s mom had joined the parade of casseroles after the
funeral. She’d come by every now and then to check up on me,
but then life happened. People got busy.
A smile spread across his face. “I do remember being
shocked the first time I saw you freshman year. It was like,
‘Is that little Macallan Dietz? She’s all grown up!’ ”
I recalled passing Alex in the hallway a few times, and
how we’d smile and say hi to each other. But the first time
we’d had a real conversation in years was when he spotted me
in line at the grocery store.
Alex continued. “And then I couldn’t believe you had that
boyfriend. What was his name — Lewis?”
“Levi?”
“Yeah, Levi. He’s a great runner. But of course, if your
relationship ended badly, he’s the devil.” I had to hand it to
Alex — he understood girls very well.
“No, nothing really ended.” A look of concern flashed on
Alex’s face. “Because we never dated. We’re just friends. Well,
not just friends. He’s my best friend. He has been for almost five years.” Give or take a few months of cold feet and cold shoulders.
“Oh.” Alex looked confused.
I was honestly so tired of this conversation that I looked
down at the menu and pretended to be really interested in
the specials listed.
“Do you know what you want to get?” Alex asked. Probably
also grateful to change the subject.
“I think so. Do you want to get cheese curds to start?”
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He wrinkled his nose in disgust. “Yuck. I know, how very
un-Wisconsin of me, but I don’t like those things.”
“Oh, okay.”
“But feel free to get some.”
Usually, Levi and I would split the appetizer, so it would be
too much for only me. Even if I did like my fried cheese.
Alex reached into his pocket for his phone. “Sorry — I keep
getting texts from my buddies. They’re giving me grief for
going back to my high school for a dance.” He scrolled down
his messages, occasionally groaning. “Something about rob—
bing the cradle. How original.”
I wasn’t going to lie and say I hadn’t wondered the same
thing. Why would he want to go back to attend a high school