The Danse Macabre came to a tempestuous and discordant end. That all the artificial instruments were ever so slightly out of tune added to the otherworldliness of the place. A new piece began.
“How was your bank robbery?” asked Czernobog. “It went well?” He stood, reluctant to leave the Mikado and its thundering, jangling music.
“Slick as a snake in a barrel of butter,” said Wednesday.
“I get a pension from the slaughterhouse,” said Czernobog. “I do not ask for more.”
“It won’t last forever,” said Wednesday. “Nothing does.”
More corridors, more musical machines. Shadow became aware that they were not following the path through the rooms intended for tourists, but seemed to be following a different route of Wednesday’s own devising. They were going down a slope, and Shadow, confused, wondered if they had already been that way.
Czernobog grasped Shadow’s arm. “Quickly, come here,” he said, pulling him over to a large glass box by a wall. It contained a diorama of a tramp asleep in a churchyard in front of a church door. THE DRUNKARD’S DREAM, said the label, explaining that it was a nineteenth-century penny-in-the-slot machine, originally from an English railway station. The coin slot had been modified to take the brass House on the Rock coins.
“Put in the money,” said Czernobog.
“Why?” asked Shadow.
“You must see. I show you.”
Shadow inserted his coin. The drunk in the graveyard raised his bottle to his lips. One of the gravestones flipped over, revealing a grasping corpse; a headstone turned around, flowers replaced by a grinning skull. A wraith appeared on the right of the church, while on the left of the church something with a half-glimpsed, pointed, unsettlingly birdlike face, a pale, Boschian nightmare, glided smoothly from a headstone into the shadows and was gone. Then the church door opened, a priest came out, and the ghosts, haunts, and corpses vanished, and only the priest and the drunk were left alone in the graveyard. The priest looked down at the drunk disdainfully, and backed through the open door, which closed behind him, leaving the drunk on his own.
The clockwork story was deeply unsettling. Much more unsettling, thought Shadow, than clockwork has any right to be.
“You know why I show that to you?’! asked Czernobog.
“No.” —
“That is the world as it is. That is thejreal world. It is there, in that box.”
They wandered through a blood-colored room filled with old theatrical organs, huge organ pipes, and what appeared to be enormous copper brewing vats, liberated from a brewery.
“Where are we going?” asked Shadow.
“The carousel,” said Czernobog.
“But we’ve passed signs to the carousel a dozen times already.”
“He goes his way. We travel a spiral. The quickest way is sometimes the longest.”
Shadow’s feet were beginning to hurt, and he found this sentiment to be extremely unlikely.
A mechanical machine played “Octopus’s Garden” in a room that went up for many stories, the center of which was filled entirely with a replica of a great black whalelike beast, with a life-sized replica of a boat in its vast fiberglass mouth. They passed on from there to a Travel Hall, where they saw the car covered with tiles and the functioning Rube Goldberg chicken device and the rusting Burma Shave ads on the wall.
Life is Hard
It’s Toil and Trouble
Keep your Jawline
Free from Stubble
Burma Shave
read one, and
He undertook to overtake
The road was on a bend
From now on the Undertaker
Is his only friend
Burma Shave
and they were at the bottom of a ramp now, with an icecream shop in front of them. It was nominally open, but the girl washing down the surfaces had a closed look on her face, so they walked past it into the pizzeria-cafeteria, empty but for an elderly black man wearing a bright checked suit and canary-yellow gloves. He was a small man, the kind of little old man who looked as if the passing of the years had shrunk him, eating an enormous, many-scooped icecream sundae, drinking a supersized mug of coffee. A black cigarillo was burning in the ashtray in front of him.
“Three coffees,” said Wednesday to Shadow. He went to the rest room.
Shadow bought the coffees and took them over to Czernobog, who was sitting with the old black man and was smoking a cigarette surreptitiously, as if he were scared of being caught. The other man, happily toying with his sundae, mostly ignored his cigarillo, but as Shadow approached he picked it up, inhaled deeply, and blew two smoke rings—first one large one, then another, smaller one, which passed neatly through the first—and he grinned, as if he were astonishingly pleased with himself.
“Shadow, this is Mister Nancy,” said Czernobog.
The old man got to his feet and thrust out his yellow-gloved right hand. “Good to meet you,” he said with a dazzling smile. “I know who you must be. You’re workin’ for the old one-eye bastard, aren’t you?” There was a faint twang in his voice, a hint of a patois that might have been West Indian.
“I work for Mister Wednesday,” said Shadow. “Yes. Please, sit down.”