CHAPTER THIRTY-TWO
Blake
Mom’s eyes narrowed as she looked between Chloe and me. “So, you’ve been gone all this time, and you’ve crossed one state border . . . twice?” She took a sip of her drink and placed it carefully back down on the diner table.
“Yeah, but there was this peach and this egg and this man-made, welcome-to-earth UFO,” I said seriously. “What else is there to see?”
“You should have seen him at the UFO.” Chloe giggled. “It was like the greatest thing he’d ever seen.”
“It was!” I was too excited. Turning to Chloe sitting next to me, I added, “Apart from you, of course. You’re definitely the greatest thing I’ve ever seen.”
She scrunched her nose.
“That was pretty lame, Blake.” That came from my own mother. “Remind me to teach you some better lines if you’re attempting to woo her.”
I shrugged and stuck my nose in the air. “No woo attempt needed. She’s already bat-shit crazy in love with me.”
I got a backhand to my stomach. That one came from my own girlfriend.
Chloe went back to our new hotel; the balcony on the other one was too small. She wanted to give Mom and me some time, which was perfect because we both had something we needed to say.
Mom settled her arm in the crook of my elbow as we walked through the park near the hotel. “I kicked your dad out. He’s living with his mistress. We’re getting a divorce, Blake. I’m sorry.”
I wanted to care, but I just couldn’t find it in myself to do so. “I don’t know what to say . . . that it’s about time?”
She laughed.
“I mean I get that he’s my dad and all, but he’s kind of an asshole. If you knew that he was cheating, why did you stay married? It’s not like you guys lived together—not really. And I was old enough to know what was happening . . . so it’s not like you did it for me.”
We stopped walking and sat on a bench. She turned before speaking so her entire body was facing me. “I don’t know, a lot of reasons. It’s hard. We got married under the wrong circumstances, I guess. We weren’t really dating when I got pregnant with you, and he wanted to do the right thing. So he proposed, and we got married. I don’t know that we ever loved each other, not in the true-love sense.” She sighed. “I used to believe so much in the idea of love that I thought we’d get there someday.”
“And now? You don’t believe in love anymore?”
“Oh no,” she said quickly. “I still believe in love. Just not between your father and me.”
“Is that why you started drinking?”
She nodded. “I didn’t mean for it to get so far out of hand—for it to turn into an addiction the way it did.”
“I’m not judging you, Ma.” I settled my arm on the back of the bench. “You fought it right? You knew it was a problem and that it had affected your life, and you fought it. You beat it, and you came out on top. I can’t really ask for much more.”
She laughed quietly. “Who raised you?”
“You did,” I assured her. “When it was important, you were there.”
“I don’t know, Blake.” She brushed something off my shoulder. “I think you raised yourself, and you did a pretty good job of it.”
Silence fell upon us as I watched a sadness take over her. Her eyes misted, and she visibly swallowed. I knew she was on the verge of tears. I’d seen it before but not like this. When I’d been in middle school, I’d gotten most improved and MVP in this tiny junior league. Back then, basketball had been just a sport, not a future, but she’d still been so proud of me. Before I’d gotten my license, she’d been the one driving me to practices—early mornings, after school—and all my games. She’d always been my endless support and probably the reason I am where I am, and I’d never even thanked her for any of her encouragement. I’d never even told her about how it helped to get me to where I was.
She sniffed and wiped her cheek.
“Ma?”
“Yeah, honey?”
“Thank you.”
She let out a nervous laugh. “For what, sweetheart?”
“For being my mom. For supporting me, even when you had no idea how much it would pay off.”
“I don’t really understand what you’re talking about, Blake.”
I released all the air in my lungs. “I got into Duke, Ma. I got a full athletic scholarship. Basketball.”
She raised her hands to her mouth. Then she cried into them. She wrapped her arms around me so tight I could barely breathe. But I didn’t care.
“Why didn’t you tell me?” she laughed.
I shrugged and looked away. “I still don’t know if I’m going to take it.”
“What?” she screeched, then understanding dawned. “Because you want to enlist?”
I faced her again, and nodded slowly. “I want to do both. That’s the problem. I don’t know which one I want to do more.”
“Wow,” she said slowly. “I wish I could make that choice for you. Either way, I’ll support you. You know that.”
“Yeah, Mom. I know.” I tried to smile, but I could still see the sadness in her. So I changed the subject. “So, I was wondering if you could do me a favor?”
“Anything.”