“You’re welcome to try,” he said, releasing my forearm where he’d grabbed me, in favor of tracing a single finger over the sleeve of my dress. It was the same spot where my dagger had rested before, pressed against my skin and waiting for me to use it to kill myself.
Brann had saved me the trouble, pulling it free and trying to take my burden from me himself.
“But I think we both know it’s only a matter of time before you let me inside your head. If we’re both being entirely honest,” he murmured, his gaze burning into mine. “I’m already there.”
“That’s a bold presumption to make toward someone you’ve just met,” I said, jerking my arm away from his grip and continuing on my way. His hands came down on my shoulders, pointedly turning my body to the proper direction so I didn’t walk off our course. He came up beside me, strolling as if he didn’t have a care in the world and hadn’t insisted he would invade my privacy bit by bit.
“Perhaps, or maybe it’s just the truth. If it’s any consolation, you’re already in mine, too, Little One. Every time I close my eyes I see you holding a blade to my throat with your eyes burning as if you were born in blood and violence,” he said, immediately drawing from the horrific stories I’d heard from my father when he spoke of my birth.
Of the way my mother had nearly died trying to deliver me.
Caelum took my hand in his, the coolness of his skin drawing a shiver from me as he guided me to the side and into the space where the trees were closer and provided better cover. The village Brann and I had abandoned the night before loomed ahead, the structure of the barn both a taunt and a reminder of all that I’d lost since then.
“Let’s find you something warmer,” he said, ducking low and pulling me to follow him as he skirted around the edge of the village. People meandered down the road that went between the houses, unaware that we were sneaking around nearby. We passed the pub where Brann had gone to search for food in exchange for helping out the next morning, my heart leaping into my throat when a man his age hurried around inside the dirty windows. “Stay here.”
I did as he said, watching as he bent forward and made his body smaller. He crouched as low as he could, approaching one of the houses on the outskirts of the village and the clothesline where a woolen dress hung. He pulled it off quickly, hurrying back into the tree line unnoticed as I sighed in relief. The last thing either of us needed was to attract attention for stealing, and I suspected we would have a lot of it in our future, since we couldn’t be seen with our Fae Marks.
He returned to my side, draping the dress over his arm as we continued to circle around the outskirts of the village. “I haven’t seen any cloaks.”
“Most people have just started wearing them. I doubt they’re all that dirty yet,” I said, shrugging even though it pained me to think of not being able to find one. I couldn’t wear Caelum’s forever, and a winter without even a cloak to cover me wouldn’t be survivable.
When we emerged back to the place where we’d first come upon the village, the barn once again tormenting me, Caelum heaved a sigh of resignation. “We’ll look in the next village,” he conceded.
I yearned for even the thin cloak I’d lost, and I’d hoped we would stumble across it as we made our way back to the village. Part of me was even certain we’d passed the very same copse of trees where I’d lost it, but there was nothing to be found.
As if it had floated away like ashes in the wind.
He carried the dress as we passed the village and headed in the opposite direction of the cliffs. We walked in near silence for a few minutes, his cloak feeling heavy around my shoulders. I still felt chilled to the bone, my dress cold and slightly damp, and the knowledge that I would need to give it back soon didn’t help matters.
“Go ahead and change,” he said, stopping when we were far enough away from the village that our risk of being stumbled upon had diminished. I swallowed, staring into his dark eyes as he watched me reach up trembling fingers to unclasp his cloak.
I turned to the side, draping it over a fallen log in the woods so it wouldn’t touch the ground. “Do you mind?” I asked, finding him still watching me as I unlaced the top of my dress.
“Not particularly,” he said, smirking as he watched my fingers cease to move. I bit the inside of my cheek, shoving down the sharp retort I wanted to give.
“I’m not taking my clothes off in front of you,” I said, trying to ignore his infuriating, arrogant expression.
“I promise you, I have seen a naked woman before, Little One. I’m capable of controlling myself,” he said, raising a brow at me. I snatched the dress from his hands, turning and walking into the thicker parts of the trees with a huff.
“I promise you I don’t care!” I called over my shoulder, ducking behind the biggest tree trunk I could find.
His aggravating laughter echoed through the woods, wrapping around me as I dropped my pea green dress to the ground and slid the new, dark brown one over my head.
Dick.
Once I’d changed and successfully hidden my body from Caelum’s prying eyes, we continued trudging through the seemingly endless woods. The hours passed by in a monotonous blur, and all I could think was that it was far too similar to my days spent staring into twilight berry bushes.
I regretted my boredom the moment night fell over the forest, bathing me in darkness that made me startle at every sound. I’d always loved it, always found comfort in the inky shadows as they wrapped around me. Something about it, after being pursued in the eclipse when the Fae took over our world, while running for my life with my brother at my side, just didn’t feel like home anymore.
It was just one more thing the Fae had taken from me, and I hated them even more for it. If I didn’t belong to the night, then where exactly did I belong at all?
“We should stop for the night,” Caelum said, looking at the sky above us.
“Where though?” I asked, looking around for any place to hide and take shelter. There wasn’t a clear spot that would hide us from the Wild Hunt or the Mist Guard; nothing that could provide any semblance of cover whatsoever.
“We won’t always have a barn or a cave to sleep in, Little One. Tonight we’ll have to sleep beneath the stars and take turns on watch,” he said, moving to a place where the trees were thicker and provided just a little bit more shelter from hunting eyes.
“How do I know I can trust you to watch over me while I sleep?” I asked, crossing my arms over my chest as he dropped to the ground gracefully, his massive body seeming fluid as it melted down to the forest floor.
“If I wanted to hurt you, I wouldn’t have to wait until you’re asleep to do it, my star, and I most definitely wouldn’t have bothered saving you from the Wild Hunt,” he said, his lips curving into a grin. I grimaced at the words and the reminder of my own weakness. It shamed me to admit that I liked when he called me Little One, against my best intentions, though I would never tell him that. “My star,” on the other hand, sent a wave of something that felt a lot like affection through me, warming my cheeks.