He’s muttering those too-quiet words again . . . prayers or pleas, I don’t know. I don’t hear them. I can’t hear them.
“No!” I scream, my voice rising up from deep inside me, shrill and wild as my finger squeezes the trigger.
The bullet bursts from the barrel with a loud crack, echoing on the night. My arm jerks from the recoil. The body drops in front of me. Dead weight. Dead. Just a body now. Not a life. I took that. Snuffed out his existence with the slightest touch.
My mouth parts on sawing breath, and I take a halting step, peering down, my attention fixing on his eyes. Still open. Glassy. The life behind them gone, vanished. The color changes. Like a curtain dropped, the brown dulls into something flat . . . makes him appear mannequin-like.
Several carriers let out loud whoops. No doubt, they wouldn’t have hesitated or required manipulation and threats to fire. They wouldn’t feel the bile rising up in the back of their throats. They wouldn’t have to bend over to empty their stomachs.
The gun slides from my hand and thuds to the ground as I retch until there’s nothing inside me to purge. Throat raw and aching, I lift my face.
Sean’s there. So is Gil. Both pat my back. Sean makes small shushing sounds.
“See, Hamilton. That wasn’t so bad.”
I look up, breathing harshly, covering my mouth with the back of my hand. Harris smiles benignly, and it’s a clawing swipe in an already bleeding wound.
I did it. I killed.
Exactly what he wanted me to do. Exactly what they all thought I would do. Everyone in here. Everyone out there in the world. A world so afraid of carriers, it makes killers out of the innocent.
“All right, people. Turn in your packs. Show’s over for the night. Return to your rooms. Lights out in ten.”
I rise and slide my pack off my back with numb movements, letting it drop where I stand.
“Davy,” Sean and Gil both say my name. I ignore them. In my periphery, I glimpse Sabine, watching me, wringing her hands like she’s too afraid to approach me. After what just happened, it’s no wonder. They used Sean, threatening to shoot him if I didn’t kill the target. Because they knew I cared about him. She’s probably questioning whether being my friend is a good idea. I don’t blame her.
Sean and Gil fall in step beside me. We start for the building, passing Sabine. Their presence is a comfort. At least I still have them. Right or wrong. For their well-being, I can’t help thinking that it’s wrong. Not that I can do anything about that anymore. It’s too late. We’re always together. Everyone knows I care about them.
I move one leg after the other, eager to close myself up in my room. To hide from what I’ve done—what I am. Even as this enters my mind, I know it won’t work. I can’t ever hide from this night. No matter that I did it to save Sean’s life, I am what everyone always thought.
A killer.
UNCORRECTED E-PROOF—NOT FOR SALE
HarperCollins Publishers ..................................................................
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HTS Detention Camp Code 11B: Any child born to a carrier shall be tested for HTS at birth. Infants found positive shall remain in the detention camp of his/her birth. If found negative of the gene, they shall be remanded to the state for placement with relatives or an appropriate foster agency.