Nothing.
I feel tears in my eyes again, and I sniff loudly. It’s hard to breathe through my nose. I touch Beh’s cheek and then the edge of her lip. I press my mouth to hers, but I get no response.
I can feel her breath coming from between her parted lips.
I wrap my arm around her waist, and I bring her against me. I lay my head on the furs beside hers and watch her face, waiting for her to open her eyes or mouth and make a sound. How many times have I been annoyed with her strange noises, wishing her to be silent like she is now?
My chest clenches again.
Finally, I realize I would give anything to hear my mate’s sounds again.
CHAPTER SIXTEEN
I sleep very little, waking often to see if Beh’s eyes have opened. I wonder if she just needs to rest and will wake up when the sun rises in the morning, just like she does every morning, but she doesn’t. I try shaking her and yelling, but it doesn’t help. I hold her head up and attempt to get some water down her throat, but it mostly spills out around her mouth. I think she swallowed a little, but it is hard to tell.
I can’t make her eat though.
Dipping a scrap of cloth from Beh’s old leggings into water I warmed by the fire, I slowly wash the blood off of Beh’s face. Beh doesn’t like being dirty at all, and I hope cleaning her off will help wake her up. I try to get the blood out of her hair as well, but that’s not very easy because her hair is so tangled. I try a little water first, rubbing the strands between my fingers to loosen the dried mess, but it doesn’t work well. I pull her up against my chest and try to use the wood carving to get the snarls out, but holding her limp body and using the wood carving at the same time isn’t easy. It takes a long time to make it smooth.
I take the time—Beh likes her hair clean and without tangles.
What does it matter if she’s asleep?
My own head is throbbing, and my cheek is sore and swollen from where the other man hit me. As long as I don’t touch it, it’s not too bad. If I forget and bump it with my hand, it hurts, but it is nothing like how Beh is hurt.
I sniff and feel my sore eyes begin to tear up again.
“Beh?” I push some of her hair off her forehead and look at the cut. It doesn’t bleed anymore, but it’s bright red around the edges, and her skin is bruised all around her temple and down around her eye. I touch my nose to the spot below the black and purple marks and close my eyes.
I wonder what I will do if she doesn’t wake up, and I don’t have an answer. As I lie back down next to her and pull her into my arms, my stomach growls, and suddenly I know exactly what I will do. If she doesn’t wake up, then I will just lie here with her until I don’t wake up, either.
I don’t bother to move from the furs when I wake. I hold Beh against me, checking to make sure I can still feel her heartbeat in her chest and her breath on her lips. I run the tip of my nose over hers and whisper her name-sound, but there is no response from my mate.
Remembering how she woke up every time I tried to put a baby in her while she slept, I wonder if I can wake her up that way. The air in the cave is chilly as I remove my wrap and try to enter her body, but I can’t stop the ache in my chest, and my penis doesn’t get hard, so I lie back down and pull her close to me again.
“Beh.”
I rock her body as I had back at the lake, whispering her name-sound over and over again and wishing I could hear her say mine. Choking sobs escape from my mouth as I tighten my grip on her and wonder if there is anything else I can do.
When the sun goes down, the cave is pitch black.
It’s dark.
The wind howls outside, and I wrap the furs tightly around Beh, making sure she doesn’t get cold. I have to hold her close to me because I can’t see her in the dark and cold of our tiny home.
“Ehd?”
“Beh…”
“Ehd…”
I feel the soft touch of fingers against my cheek and squeeze my eyes shut. I don’t want to wake from this dream. I might be a little colder than I prefer to be in my dreams, but I can hear the funny sounds my mate likes to make, so I will take the cold without complaint.
“Ehd!”
My eyelids part, and I see Beh’s beautiful face turned toward mine. Her lips are dry and cracked, and she is pale in the subdued light coming from outside the cave. I feel as if my body is covered by giant rocks as I look at her and realize I must still be dreaming. When I wake up, she will have her eyes closed and won’t say my name-sound again.
But she does. She does say my name-sound, and her eyes are still open.