Thoughtfu

Chapter 5

 

 

 

 

 

Roommates and D-Bags

 

 

 

 

I felt better after a few hours of sleep. Perky, even. I didn’t have anything to do until rehearsal later and was looking forward to a lazy day with my roommates. I just felt like hanging out with Denny and getting to know Kiera a little better. I was continually surprised by her. She was different from most girls I knew. Different in a good way. And she had the most amazing smile…

 

I was sipping on my coffee and finishing the newspaper article I’d started earlier when she ambled into the kitchen. Her hair was a mass of snarls from sleep, and she shuffled instead of walked. She obviously wasn’t a morning person. She glanced at me sitting at the table, dressed and ready for the day, and I swear irritation darkened her eyes and tightened her mouth. It was hard to tell if it was directed at me though. She could have just as easily been cursing the sun for rising.

 

“Mornin’,” I cheerily told her.

 

She made a grunting noise that sounded like “Uh.”

 

I figured some coffee would cheer her up, so I returned my eyes to my paper and left her to it. I waited until she was seated and had a sip in her before I asked the question I’d been dying to ask her since our set ended last night. “Well, what did you think?” I couldn’t help my cocky grin. I knew from her face while she was dancing that she’d enjoyed herself.

 

She struggled with her expression, like she was going to try to pull one over on me, but I wasn’t buying it. Her joy hadn’t been faked. “You guys were amazing. Really, it was unbelievable.”

 

I nodded, sipping my coffee. I knew it. “Thanks, I’ll tell the guys you liked it.” Curious how she’d respond, I peeked up and asked, “Less offensive?”

 

Her face flashed with remembered embarrassment, but then a small smile lightened her features. Her eyes were more of a brown color today, a shade of warm honey that hinted at the caring nature of the soul behind them. Sensuality surrounded by a crisp green line of determination. Remarkable. “Yes, much better…thank you.”

 

I laughed at her response, then we nursed our coffees in comfortable silence. Well, it was silent until Kiera blurted out, “Joey was the roommate before us?”

 

I slowly set down my mug as tension seeped into the room. Would she judge me for what happened with my ex-roommate? Chalk me up as a womanizer, a player, a self-absorbed asshole? It was really disappointing to think she might see me that way. Damn. Why the hell did Griffin always have to open his big-ass mouth at the most inopportune time? “Yeah…she left a while before Denny called about the room.” Let’s just leave it at that.

 

The intelligence in Kiera’s eyes flared as she examined me. She was curious, but did she really want to know? I hoped not. She’d think the worst of me. “She left a lot of her stuff here. Is she going to come back for it?”

 

I held my breath as I looked down. This was more because of Joey than me, but either way, it wasn’t going to sound good. Returning my eyes to her, I bluntly said, “No…I’m pretty sure she left town.” She was a drama queen, a control freak, and possibly mentally unstable, which…makes it seem even worse that I slept with her, so I’ll just keep that to myself. Please don’t ask what happened.

 

“What happened?” she asked, ignoring my mental plea. Damn it.

 

I paused, searching for a way to describe the situation with Joey without making either one of us look bad. “A…misunderstanding” was what I came up with.

 

Kiera seemed to understand by my guarded tone that I didn’t want to talk about Joey. That was a lose-lose conversation for me. Thankfully, Kiera didn’t press the issue. She gave me a sympathetic smile, then concentrated on her coffee.

 

When Denny came down a while later, Kiera got up and gave him a monstrous hug, like he was returning from the war, not the shower. It made me smile. Denny closed his eyes as he returned her hug. His embrace was just as all-encompassing. I’d never seen two people who hugged with their entire souls. And again, I found myself envious of both of them.

 

Pulling apart, Denny asked Kiera, “It’s our last day of complete freedom. What would you like to do?”

 

Kiera bit her lip while she thought about it. “Veg?” She shrugged.

 

Denny laughed and rubbed her arm. “I can veg.” He looked over at me. “What about you, Kellan. Want to veg with us for a while?”

 

“Sounds great,” I told him.

 

Kiera was nervous about starting her new job at Pete’s, so Denny and I spent the next hour or so prepping her. We ran through every drink we could think of. There was no way she was going to remember them all, but we had a good time with it. We even made up a few drinks, just to get her extra prepared.

 

When I left the house later in the evening, Kiera finally seemed comfortable about her new job, and Denny was the one starting to lose it. I considered canceling rehearsal to stay home and have a drink with him or something, but by the look Kiera was giving him, I was sure she had a better way to relax him. With a chuckle and a wave, I left her to it.

 

The next morning Denny looked pale, but calmer. I was drinking my coffee and reading the paper when Kiera walked into the kitchen. She took one look at my T-shirt and started laughing. I was wearing one of the many band shirts that Griffin had made. DOUCHEBAGS was proudly splashed across the front in large white letters.

 

I teasingly told her I could get her one, and with a good-natured grin, she gave me an enthusiastic nod. When Denny came down a little later, in a snazzy pressed shirt and pleated pants, he also commented on my shirt. I made a mental note to grab a couple from Griffin.

 

Kiera and I bolstered Denny’s spirits for his first day of work. She told him he was hot; I teasingly agreed. She gave him a goodbye kiss; I playfully gave him a peck on the cheek. He was laughing as he left, and I knew that even though he was still a little nervous, he’d kill it at work. Denny was a smart guy. Always had been.

 

After that, I was completely alone with Kiera for the first time since she’d arrived. It was strangely nice to have just the two of us in the house. She filled the home with a peaceful energy. Warm, sweet…innocent. Just being around her made me feel better.

 

I worked on lyrics at the table while she watched a little TV in the living room. I could see her watching me from the couch, and wondering if she’d be open to helping me, I asked her, “What do you think about these lines: Silent eyes shout in the dark, begging for an end. Cold words fall from closed mouths, cutting to the quick. We bleed out, two hearts pumping, but timeless, endless, the pain carries on.”

 

She blinked at me, wordless. For a moment, I thought maybe I shouldn’t have shared that verse with her. Maybe I should have picked a more benign one, something light and peppy. But this was what I was working on right now, and by asking for her opinion, I could share myself without really sharing myself. So long as she didn’t ask me to explain the lyrics, I was safe.

 

Swallowing, she inhaled a deep breath and said, “Well, I’m not that great at music, but maybe if you came up with something in the second line that rhymed with ‘end,’ it would flow better?” She shrugged, and her face skewed into an apologetic expression.

 

I smiled at her, letting her know I wasn’t in any way offended by her suggestion. Most people just said, “Sounds great,” and didn’t bother giving one. I appreciated her honest attempt to try to make the song better.

 

“Thanks, I think you’re right. I’ll work on that.” Her eyes lit up when she realized I was genuinely grateful for her assistance.

 

As I went back to work, a feeling started in my chest and crept over all of my muscles, until I was coated with the warm sensation. I wasn’t sure if it was contentment, comfortableness, happiness, or something more, but it was wonderful, and I soaked it up like a sponge.

 

Kiera disappeared a couple of hours before her shift to get ready. I wondered if she really needed that long. She didn’t seem the type to primp and preen for an ungodly amount of time. Her beauty was natural; she didn’t need to do anything to improve upon it. But when she came downstairs and asked me for a bus schedule, I understood why she was getting ready so early.

 

Shaking my head, I told her I would take her. She stared at me from the entryway, jacket in hand. “No, no. You don’t have to do that.”

 

I could tell she just didn’t want to trouble me. It was no trouble though, and besides, I practically lived at Pete’s. Driving over there was no more trouble than walking to the fridge. “No problem. I’ll grab a beer, chat with Sam. I’ll be your first customer.”

 

I gave her as charming a smile as I could, but she didn’t look heartened by my comment. If anything, she looked even more apprehensive. Walking into the living room, she told me, “Okay. Thanks.”

 

She sat beside me on the couch and stared at the TV while she played with the zipper on her jacket. She reminded me of Denny, a bundle of nerves while she waited for her new situation. I’d been mindlessly watching some old sitcoms. Not really caring what was on the TV, I handed Kiera the remote. “Here, I wasn’t really watching anything.”

 

“Oh, thanks.” She seemed touched by my gesture as she flipped through the channels.

 

I wondered what she would stop on, and was mildly surprised when she paused on a scene with two people going at it. She asked me about the premium channels, like she wasn’t really aware of just what she’d stopped on. I contained my laughter as I waited for her to realize what she was seeing. I had a feeling she’d be embarrassed watching soft-core porn right next to an almost complete stranger.

 

When Kiera finally caught on to what was playing, her cheeks flamed bright red and she fumbled the remote in her attempt to change the channel. She turned it back to my sitcoms and nearly tossed the remote at me in her haste. I managed to only lightly laugh at her, and I was pretty proud of myself for my restraint.

 

When there was about twenty minutes left before her shift, I shut the TV off and asked her if she was ready to go. Even though she was a little green, she told me, “Sure.”

 

I told her she’d be fine, then we grabbed our coats and headed out the door.

 

While Kiera seemed to enjoy riding in my muscle car—and who wouldn’t?—she still looked like she was about to be sick; she stared out the window, taking deep breaths in through her nose and out through her mouth. I thought about pulling over and letting her get some air, but I figured just getting there and getting it over with would be the best thing for her nerves.

 

I had the oddest desire to hold her hand when we arrived at Pete’s, just to be supportive and to help stop her racing mind, but it seemed inappropriate, so I didn’t. She stared at the building like the double doors were going to grow teeth and bite her. I wanted to reassure her again that everything would be fine, but I held my tongue. At some point, the encouragement might sound patronizing.

 

When we stepped through the doors, Kiera unconsciously stepped toward me. For a moment, I thought she was going to clutch me like a lifeline. I’d have let her, even though that would have been just as inappropriate as holding hands. Whatever she needed to get through this. Jenny bounded our way though. With a bright smile on her lips, she stuck her hand out. “Kiera, right? I’m Jenny. I’ll get you situated.”

 

With a wave to me, Jenny grabbed Kiera’s hand and started leading her to the back room. Kiera looked back at me with an expression that said both Help me and Thank you. It made me laugh. Rita instantly honed in on my humor. “Hey, sexy. I love hearing that chuckle. Almost as much as I love hearing other sounds you make.”

 

Knowing what she meant, I raised a corner of my mouth. She bit her lip as her eyes locked onto my mouth. “Jesus, those lips…” She groaned, then reached down and grabbed me a beer. “Drink this,” she stated, setting the bottle down in front of me. “I need a distraction before I pull you over the bar and have my way with you. Again.”

 

She winked and I laughed. “Um, thanks.” I handed her some money for the beer, and a little extra for anything else I might owe the bar. I didn’t always remember to pay. Pete was used to it though. He kept a tab for the band under the register, and took it from our pay if we owed anything at the end of the month.

 

When Kiera reappeared from the hallway, I couldn’t help but smile at her. She looked great in her red Pete’s shirt. Amazing, actually. Sensual. The bright color brought out the pink undertones in her skin, making her look a little flushed, like she’d just had sex. Her messy ponytail highlighted her slim neck, emphasizing the illusion. I knew I shouldn’t be looking at her that way, but I wasn’t dead. I noticed attractiveness same as any other man, and Kiera was extremely attractive. She was going to do very well here. Even if she didn’t feel it yet, she looked as if she’d always been here.

 

She was frowning though when she returned to my side. I wasn’t sure why until I realized she was looking at the beer in my hand. That’s when I remembered that I was supposed to have been her first customer. Oops. “Sorry, Rita beat you to it. Next time.”

 

Jenny took Kiera away after that, showing her the ropes. I watched Jenny teaching Kiera for a while. Longer than I should have. But eventually it came to the point where I had to go, so I made my way over to Kiera to say goodbye. I handed her a tip for my beer, the one she missed getting for me. Her brows were bunched as she took it. “For my beer,” I explained. She looked about to reject it, but I held my hand up to stop her. She needed it. I didn’t. “I have a gig at another bar. I gotta go meet the guys…give them a hand with all our stuff.”

 

Her eyes softened as she looked me over. “Thank you so much for the ride, Kellan.”

 

I smiled down at her, my earlier contentment nothing compared to what I was feeling now. Just as I was about to comment, Kiera reached up on her toes and placed a light kiss on my cheek. She seemed embarrassed for doing it after she pulled away, and my skin was warmer where her lips had touched me. I wanted her to do it again, and yet, at the same time, I knew I shouldn’t want that. Kissing was something she did with Denny, and it should absolutely stay that way. They were great together. But it was just on the cheek…It didn’t mean anything. I mean, I kissed Denny on the cheek this morning. It was no big deal.

 

I looked down, almost feeling embarrassed myself. “Don’t mention it,” I muttered, trying to think straight. Pulling myself together, I said goodbye to the others, then headed for the doors. I tossed Kiera a “Have fun” right before I left. By the way she smiled at me, I was sure she would.

 

 

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