I smile my thank-you at Liam, wishing his words to Max were making me feel better, wishing that I was convinced that Max really did feel lucky to have me. But the only thing I am sure of anymore is that I have no idea what is going on inside his head.
“And, Courtney, can you believe Kate hooked us up with these killer seats?” Liam presses as she stares straight ahead, waiting for the band to take the stage, her eyes boring into the microphones and equipment like a hawk waiting for its prey.
“They’re amazing,” she answers honestly as she catches my eye. And for a split second I miss her. Because I see the Courtney I thought I knew—the one who I believed was sincere and painfully honest. The one who never felt right exaggerating information about our firm when we were trying to land a new client. The one who would simply smile if Magda asked if she liked her newest two-sizes-too-big pantsuit.
Suddenly, she jumps up as the band walks out, Max springing up beside her, them bobbing their heads in unison to the beat of the opening chords, and the nostalgic hole in my heart is quickly closed.
“Oh my God, they’re starting with ‘Misery’—I can’t believe you were right!” Courtney punches Max in the arm.
As the words Put me out of my misery fill the air, I can’t help but agree.
Liam grabs my wrist and pulls me up too. “Get your head in the game,” he scolds into my ear. “Your fiancé is acting like he’s on a date with another woman and you’re sitting here like a zombie!”
I immediately force a smile onto my face and wedge myself between Max and Courtney as they dance, hands in the air, singing the words to each other. I mimic them, flinging my arms toward the ceiling and moving my lips, pretending to know the words to songs that I hadn’t even listened to the first time around.
I loop my arm around Max’s waist, bringing him in for a kiss between each song, holding on to him not just literally, but figuratively too. All while trying to block out Liam, who is treating Nikki like a mirage that might disappear at any moment. She’s been friendly enough all night, but there is something about her that’s been bothering me, something I can’t quite put my finger on. Maybe it is the whole celebrity thing, I’m not sure. But Liam seems happy—in fact, I haven’t seen him act like this around a woman he was dating before. Not to mention he now believes that I am telling the truth about traveling back in time. So I decide to brush aside my feelings about Nikki and concentrate on the task at hand.
I bite my lip through the three encores, trying to hide my disdain as Max tells Courtney she owes him a beer for guessing the order correctly. God, I had been so blind.
I lean my head against Max’s shoulder once we’re back in the limo, exhausted from pretending all night. Pretending to care about Soul Asylum, pretending I didn’t notice the stolen glances Courtney threw at Max, pretending that I was still sure I could fix my relationship with him. Maybe it had been a mistake to come back—to try to rewrite fate. But Ruby had said I’d been given this power because I needed it. So what did I need it for if it wasn’t to make things right with Max? Because I seriously doubted the universe gave a shit how my hair looked or if Jules had washboard abs.
“Did you have fun?” Max asks as we pull away from the curb.
“It was fantastic!” I lie enthusiastically.
Max tilts his head slightly. “Really? I wasn’t sure.”
I pull my head off his shoulder and look him in the eye. “What are you talking about? I danced all night. I didn’t even sit down!”
What did I have to do to prove it to him? Rush the stage? Start a mosh pit? Get Soul Asylum tattooed across my chest?
“I know you did,” Max backtracks. “And don’t get me wrong, I love that you came, that you got us great tickets and the limo—” His voice falls off.
“But?” I ask.
“It’s just, I don’t know. Never mind. I’m drunk.” He laughs and kisses me. “Forget I said anything.”
But he didn’t have to finish his sentence. I already knew what he was too scared to say. That although I had been there with a smile pasted across my face, he could tell that my heart wasn’t in it. A knot forms in my throat as I realize he had seen right through me.
“I’m sorry,” I offer.
Max sits up and pulls me back into him. “Don’t be! It was a great night. And, Kate?”
“What?”
“You don’t have to pretend to like Soul Asylum for me. Just be you.”
I tried that the first time around and it didn’t work.
“What gave me away?” I say sheepishly.
“Let’s just say it was pretty obvious you had heard of, maybe, one of their songs. And I hate to break the news, but I don’t think a career in lip-synching is going to work out for you.” He laughs and kisses me deeper, his hand finding its way under my dress as he raises the privacy window. “But I love that you tried,” he breathes to me between kisses.
As he takes me right there, like we’re a couple of rock stars on the way home from the Grammys, I feel a glimmer of hope. Maybe I hadn’t put on the best show, but he seemed happy that I’d made the effort. And for now, that would have to be enough.
CHAPTER TWELVE