“But it already has, Jess.”
“No, it hasn’t.” He pulled me against his chest with a tight hug, crushing the air from my lungs. My nose buried deep against his shoulder. I pulled in a deep breath, smelling his familiar soap. His arms squeezed tight around my back and I heard his voice next to my ear. “We’ll still be us.”
“Promise?” I felt vulnerable asking, like an exposed wound. High school would be a big deal. All joking aside, I needed to hear Jess promise. It was something that was always a constant with us. If Jess looked at me and promised, it would ease the fear in my gut.
He let me go and peered into my face with his familiar sweet smile. “I’ll always promise. You, me, and Sprayberry and burin’ shit down.”
“You promised not to burn anymore shit down.”
“I know. I’m keepin’ that promise too.” Grabbing my hand, he pulled me toward our spot on the bridge. “No more fightin’.”
Settling next to him, I let my gray canvas shoes dangle over the edge. I watched as Jess dropped the remaining fireworks into the water. Tonight felt like the end of an era in some ways. It was only a matter of time before his promise wore thin, like when the teenage boy got a driver’s license and an interest in girls like Ashley. Despite his grand speech, my chest carried a heavy feeling that wouldn’t lift. I was afraid of losing him; even though he really wasn’t mine to keep.
“Wait," I grabbed his arm to stop the next firework. I pointed up at the shooting star. It flashed through the sky, leaving a trail of dust. Alone in the middle of the night, the moment felt magical and surreal like our very own show.
“What’d you wish for?” his deep voice asked next to me.
“I can’t tell you.”
“Will you tell me if it comes true?” he grinned.
“Only if you tell me yours.”
“Maybe I didn’t make a wish.”
“But I know you always do, Jess,” I smirked at him. His pink lips puckered up for a moment in thought and the bright eyes became a little serious. The seemed a darker blue tonight. “What’s wrong?”
“Nothin’,” he said, shaking his head, making the dark hair flop across his forehead. “You ready to head back?”
“Sure, but I’m driving.”
“Can I trust you with my stolen Jeep.”
“You’re going to say that after the drive out here?” I reached over and pulled the key chain from his pocket. Jess twisted me back against the dirty bridge. His body pinned me down as he bent my arm sideways to pull the keys away.
“Mercy, ok, mercy!”
Laughing down in my face, he handed them back. “Go get it started.”
“You play dirty, you know.”
“I know.” He winked and then rolled off the top of me.
I climbed up the embankment, excited for the open road. Firing up the ignition, the radio blasted a twangy song I recognized by Tim McGraw. I shuddered, hearing something about girls being rain. I worked the dial, trying to find something else the old Jeep could play on the ancient speakers.
“What are you doin’?” Jess asked, getting in the passenger side. His hand reached over for the dial.
“Ah, no, you stay on your side of the car.”
“You’re not drivin’ if you make me listen to that angry girl shit again.”
“Shut up. Ok…this is good,” I said, smiling sweetly back at him.
The drums pounded. I slung my head back and forth to the hard beat of the Foo Fighters. The music had the power to open up every bit of reserve, letting me belt out the first line. I pulled the Jeep off the embankment and peeled out on the dirt road to home.
“Geez, you sound terrible. You need to just stick to drawin’ stuff.”
“You really want to provoke the driver?”
“What the hell is this?”
“My Hero.”
“What? You said I’m your hero?”
“Shut up. It’s the Foo Fighters.”
“Your Kung Foo music is gonna wake up half the countryside.”
“It’s Foo Fighters!” I shouted over Dave Grohl’s gravelly voice. Turning toward Jess, I caught him swinging his arms around in karate chops. His hands twisted and slapped through the air just to piss me off.
“I hate you sometimes, Jess Mason.”
“I know,” he grinned. Shaking my head, I turned back to face the road. A pair of glassy eyes reflected back in the headlights.
I screamed. Yanking the steering wheel to the right, I swerved trying to avoid the deer. The back tires fishtailed on the gravel to the left. My fingers dug hard into the wheel, pulling it back straight, but the unstable dirt pushed the Jeep off the road.
The hood went through the barbed wire fence. The metal spikes grated into the paint, bursting apart as they came in contact with the glass. The Jeep flew through the Johnson grass and slammed into a tree.
The impact propelled my body forward, only to be yanked back by the seat belt. I couldn’t breathe; my lungs crushed from the shoulder strap. Coughing and gasping, I panicked, “Jess…Jess!”
I couldn’t remember if he fastened his seat belt. Dust floated in a light mist around the Jeep. My terrified eyes found Jess strapped into the passenger side. The electric guitar crackled through the speakers with the pounding drums. My heart accelerated with the sound of the Foo Fighters still screaming in the car. I couldn’t breathe.
Jess reached down and turned off the blaring radio. The Jeep went eerie silent in the dark night. I couldn’t speak as I watched Jess's lips say words I couldn’t hear. Slowly, his voice came into focus, “It’s ok. It’s gonna be ok.”
My white-knuckles were still clenching the wheel. He reached over and pulled them away. “Are you hurt?”
“I…I…don’t think…so,” I mumbled back. One minute we were arguing about music and then we almost… I couldn’t even process the thought. I almost killed Jess.
“Ok…let’s…umm…just get out,” Jess said, unlatching his shoulder trap.
My hands were shaking and I couldn’t work the buckle. I couldn’t breathe. My chest hurt from the bruise forming across my body.
“I got it.” Jess came over to the driver side, setting me free.
Swinging my legs down, I climbed out into the grass. My knees gave out. He slipped an arm around my waist as we staggered to the front to see the damage. It was a tough old car made of solid metal, but the impact smashed all the way through the bumper and into the hood. The top was buckled up like a crunched can.
“It’s bad,” I muttered.
“I know, but I think I can get it backed out of here.” He turned and looked at me with a frown. “You sure you’re ok?”
“I guess.”
“Ok, then let’s go.”
Jess walked with me to the passenger side. Crawling up in the seat, he latched the seat belt across my shoulder. I moaned, feeling the band cut into my throbbing chest.
“You sure?” The blue eyes stared into mine.
“Yes,” I whispered. “I just want to go home.”
“Ok. I’ll get you there. Hold on.” Jess jumped in the driver seat. He fired up the ignition, putting the Jeep in reverse, but the tires spun with each touch to the petal.
“It’s stuck, isn’t it?”
“No, I’ll get us out…just gonna take a bit.”
Jess floored the gas, making the car shake. He eased up and tried again. The Jeep lurched sideways, spinning away from the tree. We pulled out on the road and headed toward the old farmhouse. Jess drove slowly. The cab rocked back and forth from the frame damage. The movement made me nauseous. I sucked in another gulp of painful air.
“It’s after three,” I said quietly. “What are we going to do?”
“Well, I’m gonna drop you off and then try to get this thing back in the barn.”
“We have to tell somebody,” I pleaded. I figured we needed to wake somebody up when we got back to the ranch.
“We ain’t tellin’ anyone anythin’ tonight.”
“They have to know what I did.”
“You didn’t do anythin’.”
“Jess, they will know. The Jeep’s messed up bad.”
“Yeah, I know. They’re gonna find out but it ain’t gonna be like this.”