She sighed and looked at the map. “What are you looking for?”
“Clarity,” he said. He thought about getting out the rope spear and working on it quietly for a few minutes or an hour to ease his mind. Young Garret had died in a raid and shattered his heirloom sea demon bone spear. Kip thought he’d figured out a way to make those bone fragments into the spine for the rope spear, which would give it some unique abilities.
But Tisis always got that aggrieved look on her face when he worked on the thing, like he wasn’t paying attention to her or something. He didn’t know what her problem was, but she seemed to hate the thing.
Anyway, it could stay in its bag for now. Enough time to take it out after Tisis went to bed.
She said nothing for a few minutes, then kissed his cheek. “You’ll not find clarity tonight, I think. Come to bed or you’ll stay up so late that it costs you the clarity you’ll need tomorrow.”
He followed her to the other side of the command tent. Their personal quarters consisted of a small area separated by a curtain, a chest to sit on, and a pile of blankets on the ground. There was barely room for the room slave Verity (a gift from Eirene that they had not been able to refuse) to stand with them, helping Tisis undress. “I’ll not be able to sleep,” Kip said.
Truth was, he wouldn’t mind some distraction before he went back to the maps. They hadn’t made love all day.
“You don’t need sleep tonight,” she said.
Well, that was promising, especially as Verity peeled away her dress.
But Tisis dismissed the slave and continued. “What you need is introspection and time. Come and rest on my breast.”
“Rest… after?” he asked.
“No.”
“Rest… first?” he asked.
“Only. Rest only. You wouldn’t lose yourself to pleasure tonight, or if you did, you’d feel guilty about doing so while Conn Arthur is out having one of the worst nights of his life.”
“Be nice to forget all that for a little while.”
“Tonight you need to think about brothers, and family, and what they mean. And that means thinking about what you didn’t have and don’t have and what you were cheated of and what you’re thankful for. I don’t want to help you avoid that hurt, Kip. I want to help you heal it.”
Kip lay his head in her lap as she stroked his hair, and then later upon her breast. He didn’t think. Though she’d expected him to think of family and of love, for the longest time, here in her softness and her strength, here with this family and this love, he didn’t think at all.
Chapter 60
Teia made her way back to her room, which she entered unseen in the chaos. She wasn’t sure how long she could afford to wait, but she was glad she had when someone banged on her door not ten minutes later.
A captain of the Tafok Amagez was standing there.
“What is it?” Teia asked. “I’ve heard shouting. My lady ordered me earlier to stay in my room tonight no matter what. Is she safe?”
“Yes,” the man said. “Everyone’s fine. There’s been a death.”
“A death? What happened?” Teia asked.
“Please stay in your room for the rest of the night.”
Teia gave him a suspicious look. “Well, now you’re making me nervous. My lady’s safety is my sole charge. Do I need to be alarmed? Should I—”
“Absolutely not. General’s orders. Stay put. I’m putting men outside your rooms to guarantee your safety. We’ve already checked on your lady. She’s fine. The death was an accident. We’re just taking precautions given the fraught nature of relations with the Chromeria right now. Can’t have any well-meaning idiots jump to conclusions and maybe do something we all regret.”
“If that was meant to soothe me, I’m afraid—” Teia started.
“Satrapah Azmith died at dinner. Had all the signs of a heart attack, but a woman dies at dinner with you, you check the food for poison, right? You’re a Blackguard.”
Teia feigned shock. “The satrapah? Now? I knew we should have left right away.” She mumbled a curse.
“People are blaming your mistress—” the captain said.
Oh hell no.
“—for putting such strain on her with her message. Please stay inside for the night until tempers cool. You’ll have orders in the morning.”
Orders? The Nuqaba wasn’t in authority over them. That her men casually assumed she was wasn’t a good sign.
“Uh, thank you, then,” Teia said.
He turned to go, but she stopped him.
“Um, sir? Before the screaming just now, the party sounded, uh, pretty exuberant. Should I advise my lady not to bother the Nuqaba too early in the morning?”
He looked at her as if deciding whether to take offense or not. Then he relented. “She usually switches from alcohol to other things before dinner for that reason. Morning she has her poppy tincture first thing. It levels her out. Early is probably best. Ten minutes before dawn rituals on the east lawn. Orholam go with you, and may there be only light between our lands.”
“Thank you,” Teia said.
“I’ll tell the watch captain to announce you.”
“Thank you,” she said again.
Maybe she’d put too much friendliness in her tone, because he looked at her again with something new in his eyes. He waved for his men to head out, but he didn’t follow them. “So,” he said. “Crazy times, huh?”
“Huh?”
“Crazy times we live in,” he said. “Really makes you think that you’ve gotta seize the opportunities for the good things that life sends your way.”
“Um… right. Sure.” Oh no.
“Where are you from? You look like you’ve got some Parian blood?”
“I grew up in Odess, actually. But yes. Think my family emigrated, immigrated? I can never remember when you say which. Um, a couple generations back. Dad got into debt, so…” She fingered her notched ear.
It probably wasn’t her smartest move to flag that she’d been a slave. Not usually a quick route to getting more respect.
“Huh, right,” he said in a tone that made it clear he wasn’t listening to a word she said. “How old are you?”
“I’m sorry,” she said, “but you’re making me uncomfortable.” And if I have to kill your ass, I am really in deep shit.
“Oh, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to be… whatever. Just, you’re here tonight. War’s on the horizon everywhere. I think you’re beautiful, and you know, you don’t even have a book. What are you going to do all night? Pretty boring here, right? What better way to pass the time? Do you know you have the most beautiful lips?”
He stepped forward and caressed her cheek. She had to control herself not to flinch away from his touch. He looked a bit tipsy, and Teia doubted it was from her beauty. Shit. She bit the inside of her cheek hard. “Oh, I wish I could,” she said. “But… uh, I’m sorry, it’s embarrassing…”
“Are you on your moon? I don’t mind. You don’t have to be embarrassed about that, and there are certainly other—”
“Oh no,” she said. “No, I love swiving during my moon blood. If my daddy won’t swive me then, I just find a boy who will. No, it’s, uh… my infection’s flared up.”
“Infection?”
“You know, the boy who gave it to me swore I wouldn’t get it if I just used my mouth, too. And I believed him. I guess that’s what you get when you start swiving in back alleys at ten to get money for sweets.” Teia grabbed her cheek and turned it out so he could see the lumpy, bloodied flesh she’d just bitten.
The look on his face was one of pure horror.
“And if you think that looks bad…” She glanced downward and scratched at her groin. “See? It’s terrible. You’re disgusted now, aren’t you?”
“No, no,” he said, backing away.
“I just didn’t want you to take it personally, you’re very handsome.”
“No, no, I understand. It’s fine.”
“It is kind of burning right now. Maybe I’ll just sleep tonight and let myself heal,” she said.
“That… that sounds best,” he said. He left quickly.