Dream catch me when I fall.
For some sick fucked up reason I need to hear it. I need to hear our song one more time. I flick through Spotify and hit play.
I sit and stare at the fire as the tantric beat of the song plays all around me, and I listen on as the lyrics tear open the last pieces of my heart.
She doesn’t love me enough.
I throw her letter into the flames and watch it slowly burn as the melody comes to an end.
Dream catch me when I fall.
Or else I won’t come back at all.
I dig in my pocket and take out the engagement ring that I bought her. All I can do is stare at it.
I had so much hope and so many dreams for us when I picked it.
Cheers erupt in the distance, and I look up to see the fireworks going off over the water.
It’s midnight—the end of one year, the beginning of another. A celebration for most.
The end of the world for me.
I walk to the balcony’s edge, and I stare at the diamond ring through tears. The lump in my throat is painful.
Anger surges through me, and I throw the ring as hard as I can over the cliff.
I watch it bounce from the rocks and disappear into the night. Emotion overtakes me, and I sob, my breath quivering with every breath I suck in.
“Happy New Year. Happy fucking New Year.”
26
Charlotte
Fourteen hours earlier
I look up at the board and I read the dreaded words.
Flight delayed.
“No.” I turn to Anthony. “It’s delayed.”
“Fuck.”
“Find us another flight, please,” I say as I begin to panic. “Why did I send that damn letter with Wyatt?” I whisper angrily. “What on earth was I thinking?”
“Please try and call Wyatt again. He can’t deliver it. He just can’t.”
“He’s in the air, he has no service.” Anthony shakes his head, silently saying I told you this ten times already before he disappears to the front desk to try and organise flights.
I drop to my seat with my head in my hands. I get a vision of my beautiful Spencer alone on his birthday waiting for me.
Why the hell did I take so long to get my shit together?
What the hell is wrong with me?
I don’t have my phone because I threw my SIM in the water during my delusional tantrum. Anthony’s phone isn’t working here as we are in another country, so I can only call Spencer from a payphone.
I’ve been trying for an hour but he’s not picking up. Presumably because he doesn’t know the number.
Anthony reappears, his face solemn.
“Any luck?” I ask.
“I can get us on a flight in another hour and a half.”
“Oh, great, do that.”
“But it has another stopover, so it will actually get us to Santorini later than the original one.”
“Oh my God. I’ve ruined everything,” I whisper in a panic. “It’s his birthday today.”
“It’s only early morning there. We’ll make it.”
“We won’t get there in time. You know we won’t.”
Anthony exhales heavily, and I know that’s his way of agreeing with me.
“Call my father. Send the jet. I need his plane urgently.”
“By the time it fuels up and gets here, the flight we’re on will be quicker.”
“Why the hell are they delaying all the flights?”
He puts his arm around me. “Just calm down. We have three hours until we board and then a fourteen-hour flight. You’ll have a heart attack before you get there at this rate.”
“This is a nightmare. No wonder people complain about flying commercial. I had no idea the delays were so bad.”
He smirks as he watches the flight board, and I know I just sounded like a complete spoiled brat. “I think you need a drink.” He sighs.
“No, what I need is to try and call Spencer again.” I march over to the public phones and get in line. This is all my fault.
Please pick up the phone, Spence. Please pick up.
Nineteen hours later
The cab pulls into the driveway, and a heavy sense of dread rests on my shoulders as I stare at the darkened villa.
I missed his birthday. Wyatt was still in the air when we boarded, so I couldn’t tell him not to give him the letter. When I wrote it and sent Wyatt before Sheridan came to me, I thought I was doing the right thing by setting him free—giving him closure to start the New Year fresh.
In hindsight, I was just so hurt at his past that I couldn’t think clearly, and I will never forgive myself for putting him through that.
I squeeze Anthony’s hand. “Wish me luck,” I whisper.
He gives me a lopsided smile. “Good luck.”
We get out of the car and I walk up to the front door. I turn the handle and realise it’s open. He’s here.
“Stay out here, please,” I whisper.
“I don’t thi—”
“Stay here,” I cut him off.
I walk through the villa. The small lamps are on, but the main lights are off. It’s just as I remembered it, only a lot sadder this time. He must be asleep. I walk into the bedroom but the bed is empty, still made. He hasn’t been to bed yet but his bags and things are here. I check the other bedrooms and then walk out into the living area.
He’s on the balcony. My heart begins to race as I make my way out there. It’s 4:40 a.m. local time, and the sky is just starting to brighten.
It’s eerily quiet. The fire pit has glowing red embers as the last of the fire dies out, and a bottle of scotch is empty on the table.
Spencer’s not here.
I walk over to the balcony rail and look down at the view over the cliff. All I can see is darkness as the sea breeze whips my hair around. For a long time, I stand and peer over the cliff.
I get a vision of him spending his birthday alone, and my heart hurts.
Wyatt.
I hope he’s with Wyatt. Yes. My hope returns. Hopefully Wyatt and him went out.
I hope they painted the town red.
I’m exhausted, so maybe I’ll just go to bed. He’ll be back soon, I try to comfort myself.
Yes, shower and bed.
I turn to walk inside, and I stop dead in my tracks.
Spencer is sitting in the dark up against the wall, his cold eyes fixed firmly on me.
He has a glass of scotch in his hand.
“Spence,” I whisper.
He glares at me as he sips his drink.
“Spencer.” I smile hopefully. “I’m here, baby. I’m sorry.”
“Get out.” He sneers.
My face falls. “What?”
“I said get the fuck out.” His voice is gravely and distorted. He’s really drunk.
I step back, affronted by his tone. “I understand why you’re angry,” I whisper through tears.
He sips his drink, the look on his face murderous.
“Spence, we can work through this,” I whisper.
He sips his drink again but remains silent.
“I love you.”
“Don’t!” he snaps. “Don’t. Don’t you dare fucking say that to me.”
“It’s true.”
He steps forward and leans in so that his face is only an inch away from mine.
“Get out of my fucking face,” he growls.
Fear runs through me. I’ve never seen him like this.
“Spencer.”
“Get out!” he screams at the top of his voice.
My eyes fill with tears.
I go to wrap my arms around him, but he pulls away.
“Don’t fucking touch me.” He throws his glass at the wall and it smashes into a thousand pieces.
I put my hands on my head in shock.
From my peripheral vision, I see Anthony sneaking around inside, watching… waiting to see what happens. Spencer is too drunk and way too furious.
“When you’re feeling better, we need to talk please,” I whisper through tears.
“I’ve got nothing to fucking say to you.” He storms inside and trips on the step, nearly falling over. Thankfully, he doesn’t see Anthony, and he disappears into his bedroom. The door slams hard.
I close my eyes as my heart races wildly.
What the hell was that?
Adrenaline is coursing through my body and Anthony comes out. “You can go,” I tell him, embarrassed by what he just saw.
“I’m not leaving you here with him in that state.”
I sit down at the fire pit and stare at the red embers. The sun is coming over the horizon now. I pick up a blanket and wrap it around me. It’s cold and chilly… just like my welcome.
How hurt must he be to be acting like that? That is as far from his personality as he could possibly be.