Epilogue
Six weeks later
“You sound surprised, Mr. Hamilton. Didn’t Tom ever mention to you that I’m brilliant? No? Well, I am. Most people don’t know that before Lanny was born and I became a virtual prisoner in my own house, I had a bright future as a business consultant and financial planner. All my career plans had to be abandoned. Then, a few years ago, when I’d had my fill of living a shadow life, I decided to apply my know-how to another, uh, field of endeavor.
“And I was in a perfect position to do so. Who would suspect poor Janice VanAllen, mother of a severely disabled child and wife to a man totally lacking in self-confidence and ambition, to initiate and orchestrate an organization as successful as mine?”
Here she laughed.
“Ironically, it was Tom who actually planted the idea. He talked a lot about illegal trafficking, the unlimited profits to be made, the government’s futile attempts to stop the ongoing tide. Mostly he talked about the ‘middleman,’ whose risk of capture is limited because usually he’s hidden behind a screen of respectability. That sounded very smart and attractive to me.
“Tom was an unchecked and guileless source of information. I asked questions, he gave me answers. He explained to me how criminals got caught. All I had to do was get to the men who caught them and, through men like Doral and Fred Hawkins, offer them a handsome bonus for slacking.
“The smugglers paid me for providing the protection. And those who didn’t lived to regret it. Most are serving time. They couldn’t rat me out as part of a plea bargain or deal for leniency because none knew who I was. There were always human buffers between us.
“Suffice to say, Mr. Hamilton, my little cottage industry expanded and became extremely lucrative. I had virtually no overhead except for my cell phones. Doral or Fred would deliver disposables every other week or so when Tom was at work.
“I paid my employees well, but even so, profits surpassed my expectations. That was important. You see, I had to save up for the day when Lanny would no longer be an impediment. After he died, I wasn’t about to stick around. I’d had it with that house, with Tom, with my life. I’d earned an easy and luxurious retirement. I never resented Lanny, but I resented the diapers I had to change, the meals I had to pump into his stomach, the catheters…
“Well, you don’t need to hear all that. You want to know about The Bookkeeper. Clever name, don’t you think? Anyway, millions of dollars were waiting for me in banks all over the world. It’s amazing what you can do over the Internet.
“But then Lee Coburn came along, and I had to accelerate my plan to skip the country. Lanny…” Here her voice turned thick. “Lanny would never have known the difference. It’s not like he would have missed me, is it? In exchange for a guilty plea, you swear to me that he’ll be placed in the very best facility in the country?”
“You have my personal word on it.”
“And he’ll get Tom’s pension?”
“Every cent will go toward his son’s care.”
“Tom would want that. He was devoted to Lanny. Often I envied his capacity to love Lanny in ways I couldn’t. I tried, but…”
After a short pause, she said, “That sexting… that isn’t me. I want you to know that I think that’s disgusting. It was simply a means of coded communication. I wouldn’t have sent Doral or Fred Hawkins a dirty text. God. Please. No, that was just a way to explain all the telephone activity in case Tom became suspicious. You understand?”
“I understand,” Hamilton replied blandly. “Didn’t you have any misgivings about killing Tom?”
“Of course! It was the hardest thing I had to do as The Bookkeeper. Doral tried to talk me out of it, but there simply was no other way. Besides, I did Tom a favor. He was miserable. Possibly even more so than I. He was in bondage at work just as I was at home. He wasn’t good at his job. You of all people should know that, Mr. Hamilton. You contributed to his misery. He knew he could never live up to your expectations.”
“I thought Tom had potential and only lacked the confidence to realize it. I thought that with my guidance and encouragement—”
“Those are really moot points, aren’t they, Mr. Hamilton?”
“I suppose so.”
“It pains me to talk about him. I grieved him. Honestly, I did. But this way, Tom died with honor. Even with a bit of heroism. I think he would have preferred that to dying in obscurity.”
After another pause, she said, “I guess that’s everything. Do you want me to sign something?”
Hamilton reached across his desk and punched the button to stop the playback.
Honor and Stan, who’d been invited to the district office in New Orleans to listen to Janice VanAllen’s recorded confession, had sat motionless for the duration of it, astonished by the casualness with which she had confessed her crimes to Hamilton several days earlier.
“She had Eddie killed,” Honor said quietly.
“As well as a lot of other people,” Hamilton said. “Based on the information on that USB key, we’re making definite progress. But,” he said around a sigh, “as she said, it’s almost futile. The criminals are multiplying at a rate much faster than we can catch them. But we stay at it.”
“There’s nothing in that file that implicates Eddie,” Stan averred. “And no one was more taken in than I was by the Hawkins twins. Yes, I used Doral to get information, knowing that he had ears in the police department, but I never had an inkling of what they were doing. I stand by my record. You can check it.”
“I did,” Hamilton said, giving him a congenial smile. “You’re as clean as a whistle, Mr. Gillette. And nothing in that file implicates your son of any wrongdoing. According to the superintendent of the Tambour P.D., an honest man I think, Eddie offered to do some covert investigative work. Possibly he’d picked up vibes when he was moonlighting at Marset’s company.
“In any case, the superintendent sanctioned it, but when Eddie was killed, he didn’t connect the car wreck to Eddie’s secret investigation, which to his knowledge had never produced any evidence. Eddie had given it to you,” he said directly to Honor.
She looked across at her father-in-law, laid her hand on his forearm, and pressed it. Then she motioned toward the recorder. “How long after recording that was Mrs. VanAllen…”
“Killed?” Hamilton asked.
Honor nodded.
“Minutes. Her lawyer had insisted that her statement be taken in a private office at the rehab center where she was getting therapy for the ankle injury. There were two federal marshals posted at the door. She was in a wheelchair. I and another agent were flanking her. Her attorney was pushing her chair.
“As we emerged from the office to take her back to her room, the young man seemed to come out of nowhere. He lashed at the marshal with a straight razor and sliced open his cheek. The other FBI agent was trying to draw his weapon when the young man slashed his throat. That agent died a few minutes later.
“Mrs. VanAllen was cut swiftly, but viciously. The razor went through her neck, almost to her spinal column, and from ear to ear. It was a gruesome death. She had time to realize she was dying. The young man, however, died instantly from a fatal gunshot wound.”
It had been reported on the news that Hamilton had shot him twice in the chest, once in the head.
“It was a suicide mission,” Hamilton said. “He had to know there was no possible means of escape. He gave me no choice.”
“And he hasn’t been identified?”
“No. No ID, no information on him at all. No one has come forward to claim his body. We don’t know his connection to The Bookkeeper. All we have is his straight razor and a silver crucifix on a chain.”
After a silent moment, Hamilton stood up, signaling that the meeting was adjourned. He shook hands with Stan. Then he clasped Honor’s hand between both of his. “How’s your daughter?”
“Doing well. She doesn’t remember anything of that night, thank God. She talks about Coburn constantly and wants to know where he went.” After an awkward silence, she continued. “And Tori has been released from the hospital. We’ve been to see her twice. She’s being cared for by private nurses in Mr. Wallace’s home.”
“How’s she doing?”
“She’s giving them hell,” Stan said dryly.
“She is,” Honor said, laughing. “She’s going to be fine, which is a miracle. For once in his life, Doral didn’t hit his target with precision.”
“I’m glad to know that both have recovered,” Hamilton said. “And I commend you for the numerous times you showed incredible courage and fortitude, Mrs. Gillette.”
“Thank you.”
“Take care of yourself and your little girl.”
“I will.”
“Thank you for coming today.”
“We appreciate the invitation,” Stan said. He turned and started for the door.
Honor hung back, her eyes holding Hamilton’s. “I’ll be right there, Stan. Give us a minute please.”
He left the office and when she heard the door close behind him, she said, “Where is he?”
“I’m sorry?”
“Don’t play dumb, Mr. Hamilton. Where is Coburn?”
“I’m not sure I know what you mean.”
“Like hell you don’t.”
“Do you want to know where he’s buried? He isn’t. His body was cremated.”
“You’re lying. He didn’t die.”
He sighed. “Mrs. Gillette, I know how distressing—”
“Don’t talk to me like I’m no older than Emily. Even she would see through your crap. Where is he?” she repeated, stressing each word.
He vacillated for several moments, then motioned her back into her chair and sat down behind his desk. “He told me that if you should ever ask—”
“He knew I would ask.”
“He ordered me not to tell you that he’d survived. In fact, he threatened me with bodily harm if I didn’t tell you that he was dead. But he also made me swear that if you ever questioned it, I was to give you this.”
Opening his lap drawer, he withdrew a plain white envelope. He hesitated for what seemed to Honor like an eternity before sliding it across the desk toward her. Her heart was beating so hard and fast she could barely breathe. Her hands had turned icy and damp, so she had butterfingers as she worked her thumb beneath the flap and opened the envelope. Inside was a single folded sheet of paper with one line handwritten on it in a bold scrawl.
It meant something.
A puff of air escaped her lips. She closed her eyes tightly and pressed the sheet of paper against her chest. When she opened her eyes, they were damp with tears. “Where is he?”
“Mrs. Gillette, heed this warning, and understand that I extend it out of genuine concern for you and your daughter. Coburn—”
“Tell me where he is.”
“You went through a terrible ordeal together. It’s only natural that you formed an emotional attachment to him, but you and he could never work.”
“Where is he?”
“You’ll only be letting yourself in for heartbreak.”
She stood up, planted her palms flat on his desk, and leaned to within inches of him. “Where. Is. He?”
He’d been coming to the airport every day for the past two weeks, ever since he’d been able to leave his bed for more than a few minutes at a time. The third time he’d been noticed loitering in the baggage claim area, a TSA agent had cornered him and asked him what he was up to.
He’d shown the guy his badge. Although he didn’t look much like the photograph anymore—he was shades paler, almost twenty pounds lighter, and his hair was longer and shaggier—the guy could tell it was him. He’d made up some bullshit story about working a case undercover, and said that if the guy didn’t get away from him and leave him alone, his cover was going to be blown, and then the guy would catch the flak for screwing up the op.
From then on, they’d left him alone.
He still had to use a cane, but he figured that, with luck, he could toss the damn thing in another week or so. He’d made it all the way from his bedroom to the kitchen without it this morning. But he didn’t trust himself to navigate the busy baggage claim area where people were notorious for grabbing suitcases and making a dash for the rental car counters, boisterously hugging arriving relatives, or simply not watching where they were going. After all he’d been through, he didn’t want to be mowed down by a civilian.
Even with the cane, he was sweating by the time he reached the bench on which he customarily sat to await the arrival of the inbound plane from Dallas, because if you were traveling from New Orleans to Jackson Hole, in all likelihood, you took the route through DFW.
The bench afforded him a view of every passenger exiting the concourse. He cursed himself for being a fool. She probably had bought Hamilton’s lie; the man could be convincing. Lee Coburn was dead to her. End of story.
One day far into the future, she would bounce her grandkids on her knee and tell them about the adventure she’d had one time with an FBI agent. Emily might have a vague memory of it, but that was doubtful. How much did a four-year-old retain? She’d probably already forgotten about him.
While telling the tale to her grandchildren, Honor would probably leave out the part about the lovemaking. She might or might not show them her tattoo… if she hadn’t had it removed by then.
And even if she had questioned his demise and received his note, maybe she hadn’t caught on to the message. Maybe she didn’t even remember that during their lovemaking, he’d said, “Put your hands on me. Let’s pretend this means something.”
If he ever had it to do over, he would say more. He would make it clearer to her that it had meant something or he wouldn’t have cared whether or not her hands were on him. If given another opportunity, he would tell her…
Hell, he wouldn’t have to tell her anything. She would just know. She would look at him in that certain way, and he would know that she knew how he felt. Just like she had when he’d told her about having to shoot Dusty.
What was its name?
I forgot.
No you didn’t.
Without him having to put it into words, she’d known that the day he’d had to put that horse down was the worst in his memory. All the killing that came after hadn’t affected him like that had. And Honor knew it.
Thinking about her, her eyes, her mouth, her body, caused him to ache. It was a pain that went much deeper even than the one in his belly, where he’d been stitched up well enough to keep him from bleeding out, but warned against doing anything strenuous for at least six months or risk springing a leak in his gut.
He took strong medications at night so he could get past the pain long enough to fall asleep, but there was nothing he could do to get past the ache of desiring Honor, of wanting to touch her, taste her, feel her against him, sleep with her hand over his heart.
And even if she had understood what he was trying to tell her in that cryptic note, would she want to be with him? Would she want Emily around him twenty-four/seven? Would she want her little girl influenced by a man like him, who knew guerrilla tactics, knew how to kill with his bare hands, but didn’t even know who Elmo and Thomas the Tank Engine were?
In order to overlook all that, she would have to see something in him that maybe even he didn’t know was there. She would really have to want him. She would have to love him.
The PA system speakers crackled, jerking him out of his reverie. The arrival of the daily 757 from Dallas was announced. His gut was stitched up good and tight, but that didn’t prevent it from flopping. He wiped his damp palms on the legs of his jeans and stood up shakily, leaning heavily on his cane.
He called himself a masochist for putting himself through this torture day after day.
He braced himself for the disappointment of having to go home alone.
He braced himself for happiness like he’d never known in his entire life.
He watched the door they would come through.
Acknowledgments
Cell phones have made it almost impossible for people to disappear. That’s a good thing if someone is lost in the wilderness and needs to be rescued. It’s bad if you’re a fiction writer trying to keep your protagonists from being found.
That’s why I want to thank John Casbon, who provided me with information that proved invaluable. As I’m writing this, the technology in this novel reflects the state of the art. That’s not to say that it won’t be obsolete tomorrow. Advances in this industry are made daily. So, if by the time you’re reading this book, the technology is laughably out of date, please cut me some slack. I did the best I could, going so far as to buy my own “burner” just to test what I could and couldn’t do with it.
I also wish to thank my friend Finley Merry, who, on more than one occasion, has pointed me to someone to go to for help and information. Had it not been for him, I wouldn’t have met Mr. Casbon, who came to be known as “my phone guy.”
Thank you both.