She called him that night. Then she took him to Versailles down on Venice Boulevard for garlic chicken and fried plantains. Neal didn’t know about anything cool in Los Angeles—he spent all his time at his apartment or on campus, or on the water, which he hated.
Which he hated, in practice.
Neal loved the concept of the ocean. He was practically animated once you got him talking about sea life and coral.
Nobody would ever describe Neal as fully animated. Or expressive. His thoughts didn’t play across his face like light on water. Which meant Georgie cataloged every flinch, every flick of his eyes, and tried to figure out what they meant. This seemed like a great way to spend the rest of her life.
Neal wasn’t sure how to spend the rest of his life.
He joked about being tragically bad with big decisions. He’d decided to study oceanography because nothing else appealed to him, and then he’d ended up stuck in California for four years. When he and his high school girlfriend—her name was Dawn (Prairie Dawn!)—drifted apart freshman year, Neal’s solution was to propose to her.
“I’m not good at knowing what I want,” he said at the end of the night, at the beginning of the morning. They were sitting on the beach, and Neal was holding Georgie’s hand. “I’m not usually good at wanting things.”
The sand was damp, and there was a cool breeze. Georgie was using it as an excuse to sit too close to him. She was wearing her blue and green plaid skirt and her red Doc Martens boots, and she was pushing her knee into his thigh because the reality of Neal—Neal without a girlfriend, Neal who said he liked her—was too much to leave be.
“Then we’ll get along fine,” she said, “because I’m extra good at wanting things. I want things until I feel sort of sick about them. I want enough for two normal people, at least.”
“Really,” Neal said. That’s what he always said when he didn’t have anything to say and he just wanted her to keep talking. There was a smile that went with it, sort of a mocking smile that would have seemed mean if his eyes weren’t shining.
“Really,” she said.
“What do you want?” he asked.
It would’ve been too easy—and too cheesy—to say “you,” even if it was top-of-mind right at the moment.
“I want to write,” Georgie said. “I want to make people laugh. I want to create a show. And then another show. And then another show. I want to be James L. Brooks.”
“I have no idea who that is.”
“Philistine.”
“He’s a philistine?”
“And I want to write a book of essays. And I want to join The Kids in the Hall.”
“You’ll have to pretend you’re a man,” Neal said.
“And a Canadian,” she agreed.
“And you’ll have to do lots of sketches where you’re in drag as a man, in drag as a woman—it’ll be very confusing.”
“I’m up for it.”
Neal laughed. (Almost. He smiled, and his shoulders and chest twitched.) “And I want a Crayola Caddy,” Georgie said.
“What’s a Crayola Caddy?”
“It’s this thing they made when we were kids, kind of a lazy Susan with crayons and markers and paints.”
“I think I had one of those.”
Georgie yanked on his hand. “You had a Crayola Caddy?”
“I think so. It was yellow, right? And it came with poster paints? I think it’s still in our basement.”
“I’ve wanted a Crayola Caddy since 1981,” Georgie said. “It’s all I asked Santa Claus for, three years in a row.”
“Why didn’t your parents just buy it for you?”
She rolled her eyes. “My mom thought it was stupid. She bought me crayons and paint instead.”
“Well”—he lowered his eyebrows thoughtfully—“you could probably have mine.”
Georgie punched his chest with their clasped hands. “Shut. Up.” She knew it was stupid, but she was genuinely thrilled about this. “Neal Grafton, you have just made my oldest dream come true.”
Neal held her hand to his heart. His face was neutral, but his eyes were dancing. He whispered: “What else do you want, Georgie?”
“Two kids,” she said. “A boy and a girl. But not until my TV empire is under way.”
His eyes got big. “Christ.”
“Also a house with a big front porch. And a husband who likes to take driving vacations. And a car, obviously, with a roomy backseat.”
“You really are spectacular at this.”
“And I want a Disneyland annual pass. And a chance to work with Bernadette Peters. And I want to be happy. Like, seventy to eighty percent of the time. I want to be actively, thoughtfully happy.”
Neal was rubbing their hands into his blue sweatshirt. It said NORTH HIGH WRESTLING. TAKE ’EM DOWN, VIKES! His jaw was tight, and his blue eyes were almost black.
“And I want to fly over the ocean,” she said.
He swallowed and reached out to touch her face with his free hand. It was cold, and sand fell from it onto Georgie’s neck. “I think I want you,” he said.
Georgie squeezed the hand he was holding to his chest, and used it as an anchor to pull herself closer. “You think . . .”
Neal licked his bottom lip and nodded. “I think . . .” The closer she was, the more he looked away. “I think I just want you,” he said.
“Okay,” Georgie agreed.
Neal looked surprised—he almost laughed. “Okay?”
She nodded, close enough to bump her nose up against his. “Okay. You can have me.”
He pushed his forehead into hers, pulling his chin and mouth back. “Just like that.”
“Yeah.”
“Really,” he said.
“Really,” she promised.
She reached her mouth toward his, and he twisted his head up and away, looking at her. He was breathing hard through his nose. He was still holding her cheek.
Georgie tried to make her face as plain as possible:
Really. You can have me. Because I’m good at wanting things and good at getting what I want, and I can’t think of anything I want more than you. Really, really, really.
Neal nodded. Like he’d just been given an order. Then he let go of Georgie’s hand and pushed her (pinned her) gently (firmly) back into the sand.
He leaned over her, his hands on either side of her shoulders, and shook his head. “Georgie,” he said. Then he kissed her.
That was it, really.
That was when she added Neal to the list of things she wanted and needed and was bound to have someday. That’s when she decided that Neal was the person who was going to drive on those overnight road trips. And Neal was the one who was going to sit next to her at the Emmys.
He kissed her like he was drawing a perfectly straight line.
He kissed her in India ink.
That’s when Georgie decided, during that cocksure kiss, that Neal was what she needed to be happy.