He gestured down with both hands and all the cloud furniture sank into the floor, dumping the occupants. Jason gestured up and the furniture returned, lifting the fallen people as it arose.
“This whole houseboat is A: magic, and B: not a houseboat. It’s a big magic cloud that I keep in a bottle like it’s a genie.”
At this point, everyone was looking on with scared expressions as Jason continued to fly right off the handle. He gestured to his left and Shade emerged from his shadow.
“This is Shade. Some of you have met Shade. His dad is what happens to you after you die, which is especially relevant to me because I’ve died twice already. The second time I came back from the dead, I even brought a friend. I should be with her right now because she spent the last two weeks getting tortured, but instead, I'm here teaching Intro to Sorcery to people who think I’ve got nothing better to do than answer their questions about the nature of the bloody universe. Well, I do and I'm sorry about catching you up in all this, Asya. I didn't realise I'd be having quite so many guests when I asked the Network to send someone. I should just let my friends take care of them. This is Gordon.”
Gordon manifested on Jason’s right with a surge of Jason’s aura that washed over the room like a wave.
“I’m not even sure what Gordon’s deal is,” Jason said, “except he loves Judy Garland and he’s a reality assassin. I don’t know what that means, exactly, but it sounds really scary once you start to learn about reality, which I have because I’m an interdimensional warlock ninja.”
Jason held out his hand, which became wet as blood seeped through it. Everyone in the room recoiled as leeches spilled out of his hand to pile up on the floor. Bloody rags emerged from the pile to bind it into shape.
“This is Colin,” Jason said. “He needs a moment to gather himself together. When a super god was trying to possess me, he’s the one who had my back. He’s been with me from almost the very start and he has two purposes in life: adorable little dances and devouring every living thing on a planet.”
Jason threw his arms out to his sides.
“I try to be a good guy, but it turns out I'm really bad at it and kill a lot of people. I've been back less than three weeks and I don't know how many people I've put in the ground. Asya, do you have numbers on that?”
“Uh... somewhere between thirty and fifty is the estimate,” she said.
“Those people had it coming,” Jason said. “Some of them really had it coming and the only thing I feel bad about is that I don't feel bad about killing them. So, here’s what’s going to happen now. Anyone who has questions can go to the media room and watch the recordings as much as they like. There’s about a hundred and fifty hours of them and no one gets to ask any more questions until they’ve watched them all. If anyone tries asking me questions before then, they’re getting a demonstration instead of an answer, and I showed you my portal ability instead of my other powers for a reason. You do not want a demonstration.”
Jason gestured and a portal arch rose from the floor, which he stepped through and vanished. His familiars followed, leaving a room of shell-shocked people staring at the arch, which remained in place. Erika was the first to recover, turning to Asya.
“So, you and Jason went to school together?” she asked pleasantly.
“Um, yes,” Asya said.
“It’s nice to reconnect with old friends,” Erika said, her voice then taking on the same flinty tone as Jason’s. “Now tell me about the exploding plane.”
Jason stepped into his soul garden. The sky reflected the sunny day outside his spirit vault, a warm breeze carrying the scent of flowers. He was glad that the garden didn’t smell of blood and death, which he would have expected.
What it did smell like was Farrah. He knew that outworlders had a distinctive scent to them, which had been described as like springtime, but it was hard to notice his own scent. It was only after catching her smell, once she was cleaned off, that he really experienced the fresh, clean scent for himself.
The garden had the same clean aroma, which combined with the unseasonal warmth to give the feel of a spring day. He took a deep, cleansing breath, something he hadn’t done in a long time, and let the stress wash out of him.
The rear of the bottom deck had been lowered into the water to allow Ian and Emi to ride their jet skis directly onto it. The jet skis both burst into dark clouds that coalesced into two of Shade’s bodies. One disappeared into Emi’s shadow, while the other vanished into the shadow of the upper deck. Ian and Emi were towelling themselves off when Erika came out, blatantly ogling her husband as he wiped down his wet body.
“Do it slower,” she said, a lecherous smile on her face.
Ian started pulling the towel back and forth across his back to create what he mistakenly thought to be a sensuous look.
“Gross,” Emi said, wrinkling her nose at her parents making eyes at one another. “Where’s Uncle Jason?”
“He got a bit frustrated with everyone,” Erika said. “I think we forgot while dealing with all the craziness he brought with him that he’s had more of it to deal with than all of us. He went through one of his arches and didn’t come out. It won’t let anyone else in.”
“That must be his special place,” Emi said.
“Special place?” Erika asked, turning her attention from her husband.
“He told me about it,” Emi said. “It’s a place that’s not really real that only he can go to. I’m going to go have a look.”
Emi left her parents behind to go into the bar lounge, still wearing her swimsuit and rash shirt, with a towel slung over her shoulders. Ken had arrived with Kaito and Amy’s girls, the older of which, Hana, was telling her parents about her day with Poppy. It was a story with all the clinical accuracy one would expect from a four-year-old.
“…and then we ran under the sprinkler and a hippo came out.”
“A hippo,” Kaito said. “That must have been exciting.”
“No!” Hana said, stomping her foot. “She was a stupid hippo!”
Everyone was actively avoiding the darkness-filled obsidian arch with their eyes as if ignoring the weird magical thing in their midst could make it disappear. The only exceptions were baby Jace, who was straining her arms in its direction from within her mother’s firm grip, and Asya. Her eyes were locked thoughtfully on the arch as Emi wandered in. Emi didn’t recognise her, so immediately wandered over and stared at her.
“Who are you?” Emi asked.
Asya turned a curious gaze on Emi. “I’m Asya. You must be Emi.”
“According to who?” Emi asked, voice filled with suspicion.
“I work for some people who’ve become very interested in your uncle. Also, you brought snacks out to our security people in their car. That was very nice of you.”
“They were healthy snacks, so it wasn’t that nice,” Emi said. “You’re one of the men in black? Aren’t you meant to try and blend into the background?”