“Exactly. It’s shit. It’s all shit. Most of the Hunters we’re up against are like that lot yesterday. Trainees. Kids. Useless. But they could still kill us all. So we kill them first. But maybe tomorrow they’ll get lucky. I don’t know. Next time one of us may not come back. So don’t judge me or any of us. We get through it. That’s what we do.”
I get up and leave. As I walk away I hope she’ll run after me and we’ll make up. When I reach the trees I turn back and look and Sarah is with her again, her arm round her, walking into one of the many tents that crowd the clearing round the bar.
*
The next day I tell Arran what’s happened between me and Annalise. I tell him about my Gift and about Kieran.
He says, “You’re not evil, Nathan. You’re not wild either. And you’re not your father. Talk to Annalise; be honest with her. That’s all you can do.”
“Do you approve of me being with Annalise now?”
“I didn’t disapprove before because it was too dangerous. Now, though . . . well, at least that isn’t the problem.”
I go to find Annalise, determined to talk to her without getting angry, though I’m not sure what I’m going to say. I go in the store tent looking for her, but no one’s there. Sarah walks in. I half expect Annalise to be with her as they seem to be joined at the hip most of the time.
“She’s not here,” Sarah says.
I walk to the door and Sarah moves out of the way. As I pass her she says, “She doesn’t want to see you.”
I stop.
I know I shouldn’t get angry. I take a breath and say, “Well, I’d like to see her, so—”
“You shouldn’t see her. She doesn’t need you.”
“So who does she need? You?”
“She needs nice people.”
“You mean nice White Witch people, I suppose?”
“You said it, not me.”
“Well, I’m not interested in what you think. And anyway you’re wrong.” I move closer to Sarah and spit out, “Let me tell you something. All the nice White Witches were quite happy to lock Annalise in a room and would have been quite happy to let her die a prisoner of Mercury. Not one of the nice White Witches was willing to risk their life to help her. So the less-nice, non–White Witches had to do it.”
“She told me what you did. All very brave I’m sure. But let’s face it—you enjoy it.”
“What?”
“You can’t fool me with all that pretense that the killing is awful. No one’s taken in by that; everyone knows you love it.”
“And how would ‘everyone’ know what I love?”
“It’s well known that in the raids you don’t use a gun. You cut the Hunters up, slit their throats, and slice their stomachs open. Everyone says it’s only a matter of time before you start eating them.”
I shake my head in amazement.
“That’s what your father does—turns animal and eats people. That’s what you’ll do, if you’ve not done it already.”
I lean closer to her. “I would spit on you but you’re not even worth that.”
She steps back, looking scared, but says, “I’m right, aren’t I?”
I turn from her and walk away.
She calls after me, “You shouldn’t be with her. If you cared about her you’d leave her alone.”
The Meeting
Four days later we’re summoned to a meeting in Celia’s tent, which isn’t that unusual as that is where we meet to plan raids and debrief after them. On my way I see Annalise and Sarah. I haven’t had a chance to get Annalise alone since my run-in with Sarah, though I’ve wanted to. I’ve seen Annalise in the canteen twice but when I went to talk to her she got up and left.
I hang back now, expecting Annalise and Sarah to go to the stores, but they go into Celia’s tent. I hesitate and wonder if I’ve got the wrong instructions. A couple who work in the canteen turn up next and also go in. Gabriel arrives, sees me, and walks over. I ask him, “Do you know what’s going on?”
He says, “Rumor is Van’s back.”
Inside, rows of chairs have been set out and Celia and Van are sitting at the front facing them. I haven’t seen Van for a few days; Arran told me she’d been away, trying to get more Black Witches to join the rebels. Nesbitt is standing near the front, almost jumping around with excitement. He’s just got back from a reconnaissance trip. Gabriel and I stand at the back. The tent fills up with all the fighters and scouts but there are more from the other groups: Healers, Cooking and Camp, and several from Foraging and Stores, including Annalise.
Last to arrive is Marcus, who comes to stand next to me. Virtually everyone in the room takes the opportunity to turn round and look at him. I say quietly to Gabriel, “I know most of them don’t see Marcus around but they behave like he’s some sort of sideshow.”
Gabriel turns to me and even he seems to stare too. He says, “It’s more than that, Nathan. When you’re standing next to your father it’s more obvious how alike you are.” That’s when I notice that Annalise is watching us but when our eyes meet she turns back to face the front.
Marcus says to me, “Don’t you sometimes wish the whole lot of them could be swept away in a giant tidal wave?”