“He’s your father but he also believes the vision—that you will kill him.”
“He said, ‘I’m not a great believer in visions. But I’m a cautious man,’ or some crap like that. Basically he doesn’t trust me. He didn’t believe that I’d lost the Fairborn. So it seems stuff does matter, Gabriel, because I couldn’t give it to him and so he left me again. The stupid thing is that I hate him for that. Not for killing people, not for eating their hearts, but because he left me when I was a child and then he left me again.”
“You don’t hate him. You’re angry at him.” Gabriel laughs a little. “Which at least means you’re not giving him special preference as you’re angry at most people most of the time.”
I swear at him and then say, “I’m glad you’re alive, Gabriel. Someone else for me to be angry at.” My head’s swimming still and I slump down. “I need to sleep. So do you.”
*
I don’t actually sleep but I stay with him for as long as I can, which isn’t long as it’s almost dark and I can’t stand being indoors at night. I have to go outside.
I check out the grounds. They’re large, wooded, sloping down to the lake, enclosed on all sides by that high wall and razor wire. But the lake cannot be walled and there’s a narrow beach of rocks, a small wooden jetty, no boats. The mountains opposite are silhouettes now. The moon appears as the clouds disperse in a warm breeze. It’s perfect for a swim.
The water is cool. Calm. The moon’s reflection seems to fill the water. I swim out a long way and float on my back, looking at the sky.
Then I feel something brush against my leg and instantly my animal adrenaline is released and races throughout my body. But not so much, not so much, because I tell myself to calm down and take slow breaths, and I tell myself it was just a fish or something floating in the water. And I keep taking slow breaths and the adrenaline has gone, disappeared as if it was never there.
The moon is still bright on the lake’s surface and I wonder if I can make the adrenaline come back. I think about possible dangers in the water, monsters lying in the depths, hiding in the dark, swimming up to me—a long, thick eel that could swallow me whole. I submerge myself, breathing out, feeling the cold, noticing how dark it is and imagining the eel coming to me . . .
Nothing happens. Of course no eel appears but my animal adrenaline doesn’t either. I swim back to the surface and look around, almost hoping for a monster to show up, but it doesn’t and after a minute I kick slowly to land.
Gabriel is sitting on the grass near the shore, watching me. I dress and go to sit by him.
He says, “I’ll sleep out here with you.”
I collect some wood, make a fire, and sit by it, feeding it twigs and branches until they run out, and then I collect more. I wonder if Gabriel’s going to ask why I’m not sleeping but he doesn’t speak. He falls asleep just before dawn. And I feel then that I can finally close my eyes. I’ve never turned into an animal during the day unless I’ve been threatened by Hunters, and I don’t think it’ll happen. But at night . . . who knows?
We both wake a few hours later and already Gabriel looks better. He has more color, and smiles when he sees me.
I need to talk to him about Annalise but want to put it off some more.
“Did you sleep?” he asks.
“The same as you. Enough.”
“Good.” He stands and stretches. “We need breakfast. Coffee and croissants and rolls and eggs . . . I’m in the mood for eggs.”
*
Gabriel and I spend the day eating. Both of us are underweight—or at least we are at the start of the day. In the afternoon we swim and lie in the sun to dry off. It’s another day of pure blue skies and throbbing, intense heat.
Gabriel says, “We’ve talked a lot but not about that subject we disagree on.”
“I don’t want to disagree with you, especially when we’ve only just met up again.” But I know we have to talk about Annalise. I need to rescue her, which sounds ridiculous and heroic and stupid, but I have to do it. I can’t leave her a prisoner of Mercury. I say, “I have to help her.”
“No. You don’t.”
“I do, Gabriel. Annalise is in trouble because of me. She’s in a coma or whatever it is because of me.”
“It’s not a coma and you owe her nothing.”
“I want to help her, Gabriel. I need to free her. Annalise is my friend. I like her . . . a lot. I understand that you don’t trust her but I know she won’t betray me, hasn’t betrayed me.”
Now he looks at me. “How did the Hunters know about Mercury’s apartment in Geneva?”
“What?”
“You heard me. How did they get there? You said the apartment was swarming with them. I didn’t lead them there. I didn’t go anywhere near there. So how did they know about it?”