“No.” He tucked a loose strand of hair behind my ear. “You’re a Sanders. Always and forever.”
Always and forever. “I also sleep in my bodyguard’s bed most nights because I’m terrified of the Pruitts’ apartment and he’s kind and lets me cry in his arms.”
“That Miller guy?” Felix laughed. “Isn’t he a little old for you?”
That Miller guy. Oh God, I didn’t even know Miller’s first name. And I didn’t know how old he was either. I pressed my lips together.
“So you ran into another man’s bed because I wasn’t talking to you all week,” Felix said. “That’s kind of on me.”
Or did I do it because I’d iced out Matt all week? My head was spinning. What was Operation Felix again? “Do you know who’s not a mess? Kennedy. She’s not a mess at all.”
“You sure about that? I mean…aren’t all three of us a mess? We’re all going to a school we don’t really belong at.”
“Kennedy belongs at Empire High. She’s so smart. And you belong here too. It doesn’t matter that you’re not old money. You belong here, Felix. With Kennedy.”
“With Kennedy? Are you dropping out or something?”
Why wasn’t he getting this? “No. I mean you should be with Kennedy.”
He looked at me like I was crazy. “Kennedy hates me.”
“No she doesn’t.”
“Are we talking about the same Kennedy? Kennedy Alcaraz? She’s literally told me she hates me on several occasions. Sometimes she yells at me in Spanish and I don’t know what she’s saying, but I can tell from her tone that it’s not very nice.”
“Well you should read between the lines.”
“There’s probably knives between the lines.”
“She doesn’t hate you.” But it was true, usually the things Kennedy said in Spanish were not the kindest. I was still wondering what a puta mierda was. But I figured it wasn’t good because of the tone she’d used.
“Well, we can agree to disagree on that one,” Felix said. “Besides, it doesn’t matter. Because I’m pretty sure I’m addicted to you. I tried to stay away, yet here I am. Do you think I’d ever be caught dead at a freaking homecoming dance if it wasn’t for you? This isn’t exactly my scene, newb.”
Like participating in gym class wasn’t his scene. I’d known that when I fell into his arms. He wouldn’t have ever come to this dance if it wasn’t for me. It was sweet and…damn it! I wasn’t supposed to be confused about this.
“And if you’re still up for kissing people to make Matt jealous, he’s watching right now.”
Oh no. I looked over my shoulder to follow Felix’s gaze. Matt was staring at us like he was about to internally combust. I was surprised I didn’t see steam coming out of his ears. He downed a cup of punch in one gulp. Did he not know that it was double spiked?
“I don’t think that’s a good idea,” I said and turned back to Felix.
“Yeah, you’re probably right. I only just got rid of my last black eye.”
“I’m so so sorry about…”
“You already apologized. And I already told you, I’m the one that needed to apologize. Which, I still need to do. And no, I’m not going to sing about it and get chased by Coach Carter.”
I laughed.
“But I am sorry. You told me you were confused. You told me you needed time. And I took it personally that you were spending some of that time with Matt. When I never made it clear that I still want us to be official.” He cleared his throat. “So, newb. That’s what I want. When you’re ready. I want you to be my girlfriend.”
“But I just told you about Miller. And James. And you know about freaking Matt.”
“Well, I’d want you to stop sleeping in Miller’s bed every night. And definitely stop kissing James Hunter. Nothing good could ever come from that. And as for Matt? Do you really want to be with someone who kept you a secret so that he wouldn’t have to confess to sleeping with his best friend’s girl?”
No. No, I didn’t.
“I’m asking you to choose me. Like I chose you over my company. Brooklyn, I gave up everything for you.”
My stomach twisted into knots. But not just because of the fact that his words were true. He had given up his drug business for me. He’d stopped selling, just like I’d begged him to do. But it had just made everything worse. “Well I didn’t know that giving up your business would leave room for Cupcake to start one of his own.”
“Well…I mean…we’re partners. Fifty-fifty. But I’m not selling anymore, so you don’t have to worry about anything. Cupcake handles the distribution now.”
“By putting it into cupcakes.”
“Right. Pretty clever, huh?”
I took a step back from him. “No, not clever. Felix, he gave those cupcakes to all of us without even telling us what was in them.”
“He was testing the recipe…”
“He’d already tested it on Kennedy!”
“What?”
“You know that rumor going around? Kennedy’s not a slut.”
“I didn’t say that she was…”
“Cupcake drugged her. And took advantage of her. And you let it happen.”
“Whoa.” Felix put up his hands. “Yes, I told him to put the pot in cupcakes. But we were supposed to work on the recipe together. I had no idea he’d already done it. I found out about it the same time you did. And I definitely didn’t tell him to hide the fact that there was pot in the cupcakes. The whole point is that people do know. That’s how we make money.”
I didn’t care about how he made money. I cared about my friend. “He raped her, Felix.”
His Adam’s apple rose and fell.
“I wanted you to stop selling altogether,” I said. “Not pass the business off to a monster.”
“And you asked me to give up my business when you won’t even commit to being my girlfriend. You don’t know how much you keep asking for. And I’m trying my best to give you everything you want. I’m sorry about Cupcake. I’ll talk to him. I’ll fix it.”
“You can’t fix it. You can’t undo what he did to her.”