That was a great question. We all laughed, even though I actually wanted to know the answer. How was I going to get through living with Isabella until she went off to college next fall?
I looked over my shoulder at Mr. Pruitt’s study door. I was only safe from Isabella when he was in the same room as us. And for the first time, I felt a chill run down my spine when I left the apartment instead of when I entered.
Chapter 29
Saturday
Back home, all the dances had been held in the high school cafeteria. But Empire High had rented out the same ballroom where I’d first talked to Matt. Miller’s sedan stuck out like a sore thumb amongst all the limos when we pulled up to the front. It was like a show of wealth that I didn’t understand. If they all showed up in limos, it didn’t exactly make it special. I looked down at my Keds sticking out from underneath my mother’s dress.
I smiled over to Kennedy when she snapped a picture of me. She was rocking a much more modern dress, but it was second-hand too. I was pretty sure we’d be the only two here not wearing new dresses, and for some reason that made me happy. Kennedy and I were showing up in style. Not the same designer’s dresses and cookie cutter limousines as everyone else.
Kennedy took a deep breath. “You ready for this?”
I wasn’t really sure if I was. Operation Felix was in the back of my head. The fact that my dad knew I’d been running down to the staff floor every night was making my stomach twist in knots. But most of all? I knew Matt would be through those doors. And I didn’t know what any of it meant. All I knew was that my broken heart felt like it was being tugged in three different directions.
I glanced out the windows at the other students laughing and taking pictures. The last time I’d been here, I’d had to go around to the staff entrance on the side. But tonight? I’d get to walk through the front doors. Or… “You know we could just ditch the dance and go see a movie or something.”
Kennedy laughed. “Oh, come on. This is going to be amazing. I’ve only ever waited tables here.” She unbuckled her seatbelt.
“Yeah.” It was kind of amazing. We weren’t servers tonight, we were part of the elite. I unbuckled my seatbelt but didn’t move to follow her out the door. “Do you mind giving me just a second to talk to Miller?” I asked.
“No problem. But don’t take too long, it’s getting cold.” Kennedy slipped out of the car and slammed the door behind her. She didn’t go up toward the ornate hotel doors. She waited for me right on the sidewalk, just like I would have done for her. I wasn’t sure either of us would have wanted to venture into the dance alone. Kennedy was braver than me. But neither of us were dumb. Walking into that hotel alone was just asking for trouble.
Miller turned in his seat so he could look at me. “You look really beautiful, Brooklyn.” There was something sad in his eyes that I didn’t understand. Apparently I looked sad too, because he added, “is everything alright?”
“No, not really.” I took a deep breath. I’d lost both my mom and my uncle in the span of several weeks. I was a mess. And I’d been pulling so many people into my mess with me. Just because I needed comfort, it didn’t mean I was allowed to just take love wherever it came from. I needed to make up my mind. But it was so hard when Miller was staring at me like that. It was him. He was the right choice. He was always there for me. He’d always stand up for me. He’d be my rock. Why was life so cruel?
“What’s wrong?” He reached out and took my hand.
I squeezed it tight, because I didn’t want to let go. I hated myself for being so indecisive. But this decision was out of my hands. “Mr. Pruitt knows I’m seeing a member of the staff.”
He shook his head. “That’s not possible.”
“Trust me, he does. He just told me. He’s been watching me, I think. He knows I sneak out of my room each night and come back around 6 in the morning.”
Miller shook his head. “I’m the only one who has access to those cameras.”
“I don’t know what to tell you. He must have access to them too. He said he didn’t know who I was visiting downstairs though. He doesn’t know it was you. And I don’t think he suspects you.”
Miller exhaled slowly.
“But he said I had to stop. Or he’d take the time to figure out who it was.”
“So we’ll need to be more careful.”
“Do you have any idea how scared I was that you’d lose your job today for sneaking Kennedy into the apartment? I can’t ask you to do me any more favors. I have nothing to give you in return.”
“I’m not asking for anything in return. I just like spending time with you.”
I pulled my hand out of his grip. “We have to stop.”
He lowered his eyebrows. “Is this about Matt? Or what’s his name…Mason?”
“No. And absolutely not.” I didn’t even know if I was going to forgive Matt. But regardless, I needed to do this. I owed Miller so much. I clasped my hands together so I wouldn’t reach out for him again. “I appreciate you being there for me. I don’t know how I would have survived the past week without you. But I won’t keep putting your job in jeopardy.” I could feel my tears threatening to spill. This hurt. I wanted to choose him. My heart was screaming at me to.
“I don’t care about my job.”
“Of course you care. You said you needed the money for college.”
“You think I would seriously leave you alone in that house with them and go off to college? I already mentally pushed it back two years.”
My heart skipped a beat. “Miller, you can’t do that.”
“And you can’t tell me what to do, kid.”
Kid. He used that nickname when he was annoyed with me. And every time I heard it was like a punch in the gut, reminding me of my uncle calling me kiddo. What was I doing? Why was I trying to push him away when he made me happy? Why did I have to choose right this second? Why couldn’t I just catch a break? “I really like you.” It was the opposite of what I was supposed to be saying. But it was the first thing I said to him tonight that felt right.
“I really like you too.”