I busied myself sweeping some of the crumbs from my bedspread back into the Pringles can and looking anywhere but at him.
“There are rules in this house,” Mr. Pruitt said as he made his way over to me. Before I could climb off the bed, he sat down on it next to me. “Each designed to make sure you’re behaving like the lady you now need to be.”
The lady that I wasn’t? I think normally I’d be offended by the comment. But instead I wanted to laugh. I bit down on the inside of my lip to prevent myself from even smiling. I was definitely still high. And I had a feeling that was probably against one of Mr. Pruitt’s rules.
“We follow a very strict no-processed foods diet, for starters.” He lifted the Pringles can out of my hand.
“I don’t usually eat like that either.” Only when Cupcake drugs me.
“Good, good.” He tossed it into the trash, landing a perfect shot.
“Nice!” I said. Every ounce of me wanted to lift my hand for a high-five, but it was better not to risk it. Instead, I slid my hands underneath my legs to keep them still.
A small smile spread across his face.
God, he knows I’m high.
“I used to play basketball in my youth.”
I breathed a sigh of relief. He was smiling from the compliment on his shot. Not the fact that he was about to call me out on my drug usage. “It shows,” I said. “You played in high school?”
He laced his fingers together. “You’re just like your sister when you’re in trouble. Trying to change the topic to anything but your conduct.”
I swore I threw up a little in my mouth at the comparison.
“Another rule is that you are not under any circumstances allowed to have gentleman suitors in your room.”
Who talks like that?
“Unless they’ve asked me for your hand, of course. But clearly you’re too young for such talk. So…no boys upstairs.”
I nodded. “No boys in my room. Got it.”
“Are you two being sexually responsible?”
I made a choking sound and he stared over at me as I gasped for air. “No.”
He lowered his eyebrows. “Brooklyn, it’s very important that you’re responsible when it comes to protection and…”
“No! I mean…no, we aren’t doing that. But I’d be safe if we were.” Who was he to tell me about safe sex? I was literally a walking example of why he wasn’t a reliable source. It was hilarious that he thought he could tell me any of this. Don’t laugh. Brooklyn, don’t you dare laugh.
He nodded. “All your tests came back clean. A clean bill of health is better kept than tainted. A sexually transmitted disease could jeopardize your health.”
“I’m not having sex.” My voice came out squeaky and high-pitched.
He cleared his throat. “Do you have any questions about sexual relations? Or the aforementioned diseases?”
This isn’t happening. It was like the awkward conversation with my uncle about condoms. Only worse because I didn’t even know this man. And at least my uncle didn’t use weird big words when talking about STDs. “My mom already taught me about the birds and the bees. The public school system covered that topic pretty thoroughly too. And I’ve had this conversation with my uncle. I’m all up to date, I promise.”
“Very well.” He stood up and brushed off his pants like sitting on my bedspread had been a dirty thing. “But there probably are a few more options for you in regards to birth control now that you’re living with me. You can get on the pill, or there’s even a shot. Please come to me first before you put anything like that into your system though. We’ll want to take a thorough read-through of all the side effects, yes?”
“Sure.” Did anyone ever read those things? They were pages long.
“And I’d be happy to accompany you to any such appointments to discuss these things with Dr. Wilson.”
This conversation was so invasive even for a normal father, let alone one I just met. “Sure,” I said again, even though I wouldn’t be going to any such appointment. Especially with him or Dr. Wilson.
“Will Matthew be joining us for dinner?” The air of concern about my sexual activity had vanished. Mr. Pruitt seemed to be in a good mood.
“Oh. I don’t know. I didn’t ask him.”
“I’ll extend the invitation. How about you freshen up and meet us downstairs in the dining room?”
I nodded.
He disappeared as quickly as he’d come.
What the hell was that? I buried my face in my hands. I didn’t know whether to be mortified or pissed or just plain confused. The last option won by a landslide. Mr. Pruitt was so weird. He went from terse to overly caring in two seconds flat. Why did he even think I was having sex? Matt had clearly been dressed. Matt. I couldn’t leave him down there alone with Mr. Pruitt. That would just be asking for trouble. I didn’t want to walk in on them talking about sex either.
I ran toward my door but then remembered that Mr. Pruitt had basically told me I needed time to freshen up. When I reached the bathroom I was horrified to see my hair in a tangled mess. No wonder he thought we were banging.
I grabbed a brush that was lying there and pulled it through the mess. My hair detangled in one stroke. Huh. I looked down at the brush. It must have been some magic, rich person brush. I put it down gently, afraid that I might break it. And then I went to go save Matt from what was surely an awkward conversation.
But when I walked into the dining room, it was only Matt sitting there.
“Hey,” I said. “Where’s Mr. Pruitt?”
“He said he needed a few minutes in his office. But that we could start without him. You want me to stay, right?”
“Of course.” I sat down next to him at the table, avoiding the chairs Mrs. Pruitt and Isabella had sat at the other night. “If it was up to me, you’d never leave.” I opened my mouth to say something else, but one of the staff members I hadn’t met yet bustled in carrying a tray of salads.
She didn’t question the unannounced guest, the absence of Mr. Pruitt, or the fact that Mrs. Pruitt and Isabella were missing.
“Thank you,” I said when she placed a bowl down in front of me. “This looks great.”