It’s funny how attraction sneaks up on you. The subtle things you notice when you watch a person. The quirks. Like how he’s always pushing his ear-length hair away from his brow. How he’s always tapping out a beat on his thigh with his middle and index fingers. How his lip curls every time I crack a joke. How he saves his smiles and hides his truths behind them. Reid’s true beauty didn’t strike me when I first met him. I was too pissed off at the male race to notice. Sure, he was hot, in that slightly tattered, angry rebel sort of way. But beneath the surface of the animosity that played between us, my curiosity was growing. We’d been living in the back seat of Paige’s car for the last week, arguing, laughing, and talking. Every time he spoke, I felt myself leaning in a bit more, more engaged, more enamored . . . just more. And more often than not, the back seat felt like our space, a closed space between the two of us as Paige rattled onto Neil about anything and everything. Some nights, like that night, Reid would be amped up after a long day of sitting in his empty apartment. We were both a little stir crazy from all work and no play. But she and Neil had been our lifelines. Even if we were just visiting friends, going for takeout, or a drive, it was a break from the humdrum of survival. Restless and bored were a scary combination.
But every time I looked to my right, where he sat next to me, and saw the playful light in his eyes, I knew that he looked forward to that cabin space as much as I did.
“When do you get your truck back, man?” Neil asked from the driver’s seat.
“A week.”
Surprised by the tinge of disappointment, I stared at the back of Neil’s head.
“Cast off, too?” Neil spoke to him in the rearview.
“Thank Christ,” Reid muttered. “But I owe you both for letting me tail you.”
Paige twisted in her seat to look back at him. “Anytime, I mean it.” She gave him her motherly grin and he returned it. It was the oddest thing between them, this genuine friendship between two total opposites.
“Are you going to the show tomorrow?” Neil asked. “I’ll go with you.”
“Nah,” Reid said. “I’m sick of seeing them play without me. They get it.”
Neil nodded and Paige intervened. “You two go out anyway, okay? Me and Stella have to work.”
Reid nodded, Neil turned up the radio, and I felt sick and ridiculous. In a week he’d have his freedom, and I wondered what he would do with it. I’d been to another practice with Reid where he didn’t take part and had started four different drafts of articles on Dead Sergeants.
If I wasn’t sitting next to him in the back seat of Paige’s car, I was writing articles about his band, or feeding him lunch, which he was more receptive to. We’d talk while he ate. My relief at knowing he wouldn’t go without that day. The conversation was easy between us, but turned tense with the lingering goodbye stares at his front door. It wasn’t a big mystery why I suddenly felt the need to glance at him when he wasn’t watching me. I’d submerged myself into his life, his habits, his problems, him.
I needed to get out of it and fast.
“Stella!” Paige chimed from the front seat with a wink for me.
I smiled as she cranked the song up and explained to everyone in the car, “It’s her favorite song.”
“This?” Reid asked as he looked me over. “The Cars?”
Paige was quick with her explanation. “Daddy used to sing it to her every night before bed. And the Eagles. She would only go to sleep if he sang to her.”
Reid looked over at me with amused eyes.
“Don’t even start,” I warned.
His lip curled before he bit it. And I was suddenly dying to snatch it from his teeth and suck on it. I swallowed the desire and averted my eyes. “People dismiss old music far too easily,” I defended as the heat invaded my face.
“I don’t,” Reid said thoughtfully. I was ready to kill Paige for leaving no stone unturned when it came to fun facts about Stella. Then I felt his eyes on me, and the heat in my face spread.
“It’s depressing, right?” Paige remarked about the song.
“It’s the best kind of love song,” I defended. “He knows her so intimately, no one else can be to her what he can.”
“I like it,” Neil said with a wink in the rearview.
Quickly changing the subject, I grasped for straws. “If I get published in Austin Speak, I get to cover City Limits.”
Paige looked back to me with wide eyes. “That’s awesome. Oasis is one of the headliners! Dad would freak!”
“They are, and I know,” I said with a widening smile. A small pang hit me dead center when I thought about my dad. I missed him and our long talks. He had been my biggest supporter when it came to my passion for music. While my mother taught me all things Tejano, my father had spent hours dancing with me in the living room to American classics. He’d also played the biggest role in my education when it came to music. Like me, he had eclectic taste and played a pivotal role in fueling the fire. He was a connoisseur, and I his eager student.
“You miss him,” Paige gathered from the look on my face.
“Yeah,” I said, looking out the window.
“Maybe we can drive up to Dallas in a few weeks,” Paige offered. “I miss them, too.”
I nodded, trying to stifle the sudden burn in my throat. I still felt a new kind of alone in Austin, as if I really didn’t have anything keeping me there except my dreams. And the more I lived in the reality of Austin, the more far-fetched they seemed. Still, I had two years of school to get through and a semi-promising agreement with a gorgeous editor in chief, but nothing was guaranteed. Lexi must have sixth sensed my sudden desperation.
Lexi: I really can’t believe this kid. I have some questions for his father if I ever find the son of a bitch.
What did he do now?
Lexi: He peed off the porch like a caveman. Like we live in the woods and not the suburbs with neighbors on all sides. You would think he would only pull his pants down slightly, right? No, not this guy. His pants were around his ankles. His little pecker and bare ass on display for all the world to see.
I threw my head back with a laugh.
Hang in there. Only a few more weeks.
Lexi: You have a place yet? I’m about to lose it!
Almost. I promise.
Lexi: Thank God. X
Optimism gave way as I shook off the doubts about my future. It was all up to me.
After another few hours at Todd and Ana’s—the bartenders at The Plate Bar and couple who owned the house we frequented when we all had the same night off—I was itching to be alone with Reid again in the back seat. I was like a new addict, craving his attention, the intensity in his eyes, capturing his rare smile just for myself. But that night, despite his relief to be out of the house, he stood in the shadows, beer in hand, in his jeans, black boots, and faded black T-shirt that had seen better decades. The silver link chain from his wallet hung as the only jewelry on him. He was completely organic. What you saw is what you got. His day-old stubble and dark skin mixed with the black ink that covered his toned arms made him more alluring. Most of the time, Reid looked uninterested, as if he expected more wherever we went. He never drank too much, just enough to take the edge off. I assumed it was because of his parents’ addiction. He hit the joint every time it was passed. I, however, had decided that night to immerse myself front and center. I was on my fifth beer when Paige nudged my shoulder, ripping my gaze from Reid.
“What?” I asked, aggravated. She gave me a pointed look that told me I’d been staring too hard. Still, every few minutes, my eyes slowly drifted back to him. I felt safe, though, because that night he was far off, as if he was somewhere else but stuck where he stood.