“Then don’t. Just say good night until tomorrow.”
Jackson closed his eyes and took a deep breath before he moved over to Tucker’s final resting place and kneeled. I stepped back a bit, wanting to give him as much space and time as he needed. I didn’t move too far back, though, because I needed him to feel my presence. I needed him to know he wasn’t alone even though he had his space.
“Hey, buddy,” he said, his voice smooth like whiskey. “I don’t know how to do this. I don’t know how to let you go.” He sniffled, wiping his nose with his hand. “You were a good boy, the definition of unconditional love. When everyone left me, you stayed near. You loved me on the days I didn’t deserve it. You stood by my side on the good days and the bad. You put up with my moods and loved me regardless of my shortcomings.” He sniffled and lowered himself to the ground, laying his hand upon the grass. “You were there when I had nothing. You’re the best friend I’ve ever had, and I’m not gonna lie; this hurts.
“This hurts more than I knew it would, but you wouldn’t want me to fall apart, so I won’t. I don’t believe in heaven, but today I will for you. I hope you’re running through the biggest park filled with bones and chew toys. You were the best dog I could’ve ever wished for, and I can never thank you enough. I love you, Tuck. I always will. Always and always. Good night until tomorrow.”
My ears perked up as the words ‘always and always’ fell from Jackson’s tongue. He didn’t even know what he’d said, but my family’s words had just fallen from his lips. I felt the chills as they caused goose bumps all along my arms.
As he stood, he wiped the tears from his cheeks and turned my way with the saddest gaze I’d ever seen. Without a word, I wrapped my arms around him.
He rested his forehead against mine and inhaled slowly. “Gracelyn Mae?”
“Yes?”
His lips brushed against mine as his eyes slowly shut. “I’m really glad you exist.”
29
Jackson Ten Years Old
“Really?” I gleamed, staring at my parents. “I can really get one?!” My face hurt because I was smiling so hard. We were standing in the pet store staring at the cages with all different types of puppies.
“Yes. You’ve been doing so great with your grades. Plus, we think you’re old enough to have a bit more responsibility now. So”—Dad gestured toward the dogs—“let’s find you a new friend.”
I wanted to cry because that was what I wanted.
I’d always wanted a friend, and now I was going to get one.
My parents walked through the shop with me, pointing out which dogs they liked. They didn’t agree on anything, and then they’d say something mean to one another. Even though they tried their best to hide it, they fought underneath their breaths. I didn’t get why they were so annoyed with one another lately.
All they had to do was say I love you to fix things.
I didn’t let their fighting get to me that afternoon, though.
I was on a mission to find the right dog to be my new partner in crime. That way, when my parents were fighting, I’d have someone to keep me company.
“What about him?” I asked, nodding toward a black puppy who was wagging his tail so fast as he looked at me. It looked like he was excited about finding a new friend, too.
The employee got the dog for us. He then took us into a room to interact with the puppy to see if it was a match. The second they placed the dog down, he leaped in my direction, jumping in my lap. He began licking my face and hugging me as I hugged him tight.
Ma smiled. “I think we found the perfect guy for you.”
I laughed as he kept kissing my face.
“Now all we need is a name,” Dad remarked.
Whenever I would pull him back a little, he’d dig himself deeper into my lap. “How about Tucker?” I laughed. “Because he keeps tucking himself against me.”
“Tucker.” Ma nodded, still smiling. “I love it.”
“Me too,” Dad replied.
They agreed.
It must’ve been right.
“Hi, Tucker,” I whispered, holding him close to me. It felt like he was hugging me back, and I liked that the most. I never, ever wanted to let him go. “I’m going to love you forever.”
30
Grace
“Gracelyn Mae! Get down here, will you?” Mama hollered the morning of the peach festival. I’d been helping at her house by baking cupcakes all morning. The whole town was in a rush to get it set up, and I’d just finished putting on the red sundress Mama had picked out for me.
We hadn’t truly spoken about anything, and the truth was, I was glad. I was certain if we did talk, it would just result in another disagreement, and I was tired of having those conversations with her.
Soon enough, I’d be back in Atlanta teaching. Therefore, I didn’t see a point in arguing with her.
As I walked downstairs, Mama tilted her head toward me. “Oh,” she muttered. “Is that how it looks on?”
“Mama, don’t start,” I warned, feeling all my insecurities bubbling up.
“No, no, it’s fine. You look fine.”
Then Judy walked into the room, and Mama gasped, her hands flying over her mouth. “Oh my gosh, darling, you look stunning!” she remarked about Judy’s white sundress.
The sundress was identical to mine, just a different color.
Judy beamed so brightly and twirled. “Isn’t it fun? Oh my gosh, I’m so excited for today and for the fireworks display tonight. I think we are going to raise so much money for charity.”
“With that beautiful smile of yours, you’ll get everyone to hand over their money for the cause. Did you choose which one you wanted to donate to?”
Every peach festival, the church held a big barbecue and carnival, and all the money raised went to a charity. Seeing how Judy was in charge of organizing the event, she got to choose where the money from the event would go.
“Yes,” she replied, looking in my direction. “I want to donate to the MISS Foundation,” she said.
My heart skipped a beat. “Judy,” I whispered, and she gave me the most gentle smile.
“I just think it’s important, you know? The work they do; their values and support—it save lives.”
I tried to blink away my tears, and I nodded. I knew from personal experience how much they could save a life.
The MISS Foundation helped families who’d suffered from the unbearable loss of a child. When I had my first miscarriage, they were who I turned to. When I had my seventh, they were who kept me from drowning.
I’d once mentioned the foundation to Judy years ago; I hadn’t had a clue she remembered.
But, of course, she did. She was, after all, the one who restored my faith in humanity each day.
I walked over to her and gave her the tightest squeeze. “Thank you,” I whispered.
“Always,” she replied, squeezing me even more. “The dress looks better on you, by the way.”
Oh, sister, you and your lies.
The carnival began, and everyone in town was there—except for the Emery men, of course. I had asked Jackson if he would attend, and he’d said he would rather eat five hundred cans of anchovies than be surrounded by all the folks of charming ole Chester.
I couldn’t blame him. If it wasn’t for me being Chester royalty, I would’ve avoided it, too.
It was probably a good thing he wasn’t there because the number of times his name was upon someone’s tongue was infuriating. Jackson never talked about anyone in town. Heck, I was almost certain he didn’t even know most of their names, but they were true fanatics about tossing his around.
Every time someone said something ugly about him, the hair on my arms stood up. Every time someone called him a monster, I wanted to stand up to them. He wasn’t a monster at all, not the real Jackson. He was so gentle and kind. He saved me when I felt so alone.