“Hey, Gram, can you hand me that flashlight?”
Danny shifted as the ledge of the cabinet dug into his lower back. He was three seconds away from ripping the goddamn sink out of the wall and throwing it across the room.
“Here you go, love,” she said, holding it out for him.
“Thanks,” he said absently, placing the wrench on his chest to free his hand for the light.
“I don’t know why you won’t just let me call a plumber.”
“Gram, you’re bruising my ego,” he said, although he was seriously beginning to wonder the same thing.
She leaned down and swatted his knee. “Oh, stop it with your ego. I know you’re capable of doing it. I’d just rather you didn’t.”
“Why?” he grunted as he worked the wrench to loosen a nut.
“Because there are better ways for you to spend your afternoon.”
Danny lifted his head slightly, peeking out from under the sink. “You know nothing trumps you,” he said with a wink, and she chuckled.
“Stop schmoozing me. Who do you think you’re talking to?”
Danny laughed as he positioned the flashlight near his shoulder. As much as he made jokes, what he’d said was the truth; there was nothing that took precedence over her, no matter how much she tried to urge him to feel otherwise, and she knew it.
“Alright, I need a different wrench,” he said, sliding out from under the sink and rubbing his lower back. “I’m pretty sure I have the one I need in my car.”
“Why don’t you take a break?” she said, handing him the glass of iced tea he hadn’t even seen her pour. He took it gratefully, leaning his back up against the cabinet and taking a large sip.
“Thanks,” he said, wiping the back of his hand over his mouth.
She nodded with a smile, shuffling over to the chair near the table. “So, did you ever get in touch with Leah?”
“What?” he asked, startled.
“For the flowers,” she said, taking a seat across from him. “Did you thank her for me?”
“Oh,” he said. “Yeah, I did.”
“She seems sweet.”
Danny took another long sip of his drink. “Yeah,” he said, reaching above him to place the glass on the counter near the sink.
“Beautiful too,” she said innocently, looking at her pants as she brushed away invisible lint.
“Gram.”
“What?” she said.
Danny opened his mouth, only to close it without answering. He shook his head as he pulled himself to his feet. “It doesn’t matter.”
“Of course it does.”
He leaned down, saying nothing as he sifted through the toolbox.
“You deserve to be happy,” she said, and he laughed bitterly.
“That’s debatable,” he said as he straightened, turning to walk toward the door.
“Daniel,” she said firmly, and he stopped in his tracks. “Please don’t leave while I’m having a conversation with you. It’s rude.”
He looked down with a nod. “Sorry.”
A second later he heard her come up behind him, and then her hand was on his bicep, turning him back around to face her. “You do deserve to be happy. That’s all I’ve ever wanted for you.”
His teeth came together as he tried to smother the surge of frustration he felt at her words. “Yeah?” he asked tightly. “And what about Leah? Does she deserve to be happy?”
“Daniel,” she said softly.
“You think getting involved with someone like me would make her happy?” he continued. “You think she’d just overlook everything that comes along with it?”
Gram looked down, twisting the ring on her left hand. “Everyone has baggage, Daniel.”
“Gram, come on,” he said.
When she didn’t lift her eyes, his voice softened.
“It wouldn’t be fair,” he said. “You know it wouldn’t.”
Her shoulders rose slightly as she took a breath before looking up at him. “You’re not dying, love.”
He winced as if she’d hit him.
“You still have your whole life ahead of you,” she went on. Gram brought her hand to the side of his face as she said, “Don’t miss out on the chances you have to make it a wonderful one.”
Danny shook his head slightly. “Do you hear what you’re saying? So, I’m supposed to just string her along on the off chance that everything goes my way?”
She opened her mouth to respond, but he cut her off. “And what happens when it doesn’t go my way, Gram? What happens then?”
She stared up at him, her hand still pressed to his cheek as her eyes filled with tears. “My boy,” she said softly. “You can’t stop living. You’re the one who taught me that, remember?”
He looked down, swallowing hard. “You deserve to be happy,” she said, using her hand on his face to lift his gaze back to hers. “You deserve to be happy,” she repeated, looking him in the eyes. He stared at her as she gave him a watery smile before patting his cheek.
And then she walked past him and into her bedroom, closing the door behind her.
“F*ck,” Danny mumbled, rubbing his hands roughly over his face before he walked over to her chair and dropped into it.
The absolute last thing he needed was Gram urging him to call her—because the truth was, he’d been fighting his desire to do just that every day since that goddamn lunch date, and he didn’t know how much longer he’d be able to resist that impulse with Gram’s prodding battling his common sense.
He couldn’t do it. It would be wrong on so many levels to pursue her. Even Gram must have known that. But her hopeless optimism was getting in the way of her judgment; she was still clinging to the idea that everything might work out. Danny understood why; it was the only thing that kept her from falling to pieces. She needed that fantasy in order to get out of bed every morning, and the last thing he’d ever want to do was deprive her of that.
But just because he was allowing her to exist in a fantasy world didn’t mean he wasn’t strongly rooted in reality.
Gram had said that he still had a future.
But he knew what that future was going to look like, and dragging someone else into it would be repulsively self-serving.
Danny laughed humorlessly, running his hand through his hair.
Maybe he’d gotten caught up in Gram’s fantasy world more than he’d realized, because it was ridiculous for him to even be thinking about what the fallout would be for Leah if they got involved. Once she learned the truth about him, she’d go running for the hills anyway. So none of it mattered.
Case closed. End of story.
At least, that should have been the end of the story.
But her number was in his phone, taunting him every goddamn day. He knew he should just delete it, but some twisted, masochistic part of him wouldn’t allow it.
He had promised himself he wouldn’t contact her again after that call about the flowers, but then he’d gone ahead and called her again on New Year’s Day, justifying it because she had contacted him first; she had texted him, and he was simply responding. After all, just because he wasn’t going to pursue her didn’t mean he had to be rude.
Maybe that was it.
Maybe that was how he needed to handle her. If she reached out to him, he would respond—he just wouldn’t initiate anything himself.
Danny exhaled heavily, running both hands up through his hair as he stood and made his way through the house and out to his car.
He was just going to leave it up to fate.
Danny smirked sardonically at that as he opened the trunk and sifted through his toolbox. Because if there was one thing he could count on, it would be that fate would f*ck him over.
Again.