She took in a shaky breath. “No, you’re right.”
He patted her on the hand and then rose. He leaned out the door and bellowed down the hall for Tina. A moment later, Tina returned, rolling her eyes at the elderly doctor.
She showed Lily into the bathroom and gave her the instructions, which Lily didn’t really need, but she stared blankly and nodded as if she had no clue what was expected of her.
Maybe she should have just done one of those stick pregnancy things. At least then she would be home, alone, and not in front of someone else when she received the shock of her life.
A few moments later, she exited the bathroom and returned to her tiny exam room to wait. And wait. Each minute that ticked by seemed like an eternity. She kept eyeing her phone nervously, knowing that eventually someone would figure out she wasn’t at home and would want to know what she was up to. And she hated lying. But what was she supposed to say? If she said she was at the doctor’s, she’d have no fewer than three people in the waiting room for her when she got out. If she lied and then someone saw her and casually mentioned her whereabouts, it would be even messier.
She sighed, leaned her head down onto the table, and closed her eyes.
Breathe. Just breathe, Lily. They promised it would be different. They swore what happened with Rose wouldn’t happen again.
Tears gathered, stinging her eyes and drawing up her nose. She’d gained so much strength during the last two years. Strength she hadn’t imagined she possessed. A newfound happiness and independence she would have thought beyond her reach.
But this … This had the power to destroy her all over again.
The door opened.
She yanked her head up to meet Dr. Burton’s gaze. She stared hard, trying to see something. Some sign.
He came in and sat across from her, his expression still unreadable. Some of the tension started to unknot in her stomach until he reached over to slide his wrinkled hand over hers. He squeezed and her world tilted sideways.
“Lily, my dear, you are indeed pregnant.”
Even though she’d known, she’d suspected, the news still came like ice-cold water thrown over her head. Her mouth opened in automatic denial, but she clamped her lips shut and dug her teeth into the bottom one to prevent the sound of dismay from escaping.
Dr. Burton’s eyes softened in sympathy. “I know the news isn’t ideal and probably not what you wanted to hear. But is it so bad?”
Lily’s eyes watered. “I don’t understand. I was so careful. I took all my pills.” Her cheeks colored at the next admission, but he was her doctor and they’d certainly been down this road before. “We don’t use condoms anymore. Maybe I should have insisted we continue. I know they would have done anything for me. But I’d hoped after I started on birth control that we wouldn’t need to.”
The doctor squeezed her hand again. “Birth control isn’t one hundred percent effective. It’s close, but you’d be surprised at how many ‘oops’ babies I’ve delivered over the years. Sometimes these things just happen, and I’m always convinced that if God intends it, then he finds a way for it to happen. Maybe this baby was just meant to be.”
And Rose wasn’t?
She wanted to scream it. Why was this baby more deserving of a chance than her sweet, darling daughter had been?