Beautiful World, Where Are You

After dinner, they walked down to meet Felix for a drink. A cool light was fading over the sea, blue and faintly yellow. Felix was standing outside The Sailor’s Friend when

they arrived, talking on the phone. He waved to them with his free hand, saying into his phone: We’ll see, I’ll ask. Listen, I’ll let you go, alright? They went inside together then. If it isn’t the bold Felix Brady, said the barman. My best customer. To the others, Felix said: That’s his idea of a joke. The four of them sat down together in a booth near the empty fireplace, drinking, and talking about different cities they had lived in. Felix asked Alice about New York, and she said she had found it stressful and confusing. She said everybody there lived in very strange buildings, with hallways and staircases that led nowhere, and none of the doors ever closed properly, even bathroom doors, even in expensive places. Felix said he had moved to London after he finished school and spent some time there working as a barman, including a short stint at a strip club, which he told them was the most depressing job he’d ever had. Addressing Simon, he asked: Have you ever been to a strip club? Politely, Simon said no. Awful places, said Felix.

You should have a look sometime, if you ever feel like things are going okay in the world. Simon said he had never lived in London but had spent a bit of time there when he was at university, and after that he had lived in Paris for several years. Felix asked whether he spoke any French, and Simon said yes, adding that his partner at the time had been Parisian and they had spoken French at home. You lived together? said Felix.

Simon was taking a drink from his glass. He nodded. How long for? said Felix. Sorry, I’m like interviewing you now. I’m just curious. Simon said about four or five years.

Raising his eyebrows, Felix said: Oh right. And you’re single now, are you? Simon gave a wry smile at that, and Felix laughed. Eileen was plaiting a lock of her hair idly with her fingers, watching them. Yes, I’m single, Simon said. Dropping the half-finished braid, Eileen interjected: Well, you’re seeing someone. This remark seemed to interest Felix, and he glanced back at Simon quickly. No, not at the moment, Simon

replied. You mean Caroline, we’re not seeing each other anymore. Eileen affected a surprised face, opening her mouth up in the shape of an ‘o’, and then, perhaps to mask some real surprise, returned to plaiting her hair. So secretive, she said. You weren’t going to tell me? To Felix, she added: He never tells me anything. Simon sat watching her, amused. I was going to tell you, he said. I was just waiting for the opportune moment. She let out a little laugh, her face turning pink. Opportune in what sense? she asked. Cheerfully Felix put his glass down on the table. Now we’re having fun, he said.

After another drink, another, and one more, they left the bar and went to get ice cream.

Eileen and Alice were laughing, talking about someone they had hated in college, who had recently married someone else they had also hated in college. Have they always been so mean? Felix said to Simon. In a humorous tone, Simon answered that Eileen had actually been a nice girl before she met Alice, and Alice called back: I knew you were going to say that. The shop on the corner with its sliding automatic doors, buzzing white light fixtures, glossy floor tiles. By the fruit and vegetable crates, a display of fresh flowers. Gravy granules, rolls of baking paper, identical bottles of vegetable oil.

Alice slid open the freezer door and they each selected a pre-packaged ice cream. Then she remembered they would need milk and soda bread for breakfast, and kitchen roll, and Eileen wanted toothpaste. As they approached the till with these items, Alice took her purse from her bag, and Simon said: No, no, let me. Eileen watched him fish his wallet from his pocket, a slim leather wallet, which he unfolded with one hand to take out his card. Glancing up, he caught her looking, and sheepishly she smiled, touching her ear, and he smiled back at her. Quietly Felix looked on, while Alice packed the items into a cloth bag. Walking back up the coast road, they ate their ice creams and talked about whether they had gotten any sunburn at the beach earlier. Alice and Eileen

falling behind together, arm in arm, smelling of perfume and sun lotion, talking about Henry James. I never know what to think until I talk to you, Alice said. Simon and Felix striding up the hill ahead, Felix asking about Simon’s family, about where he grew up, about his previous relationships. Politely and pleasantly Simon answered his questions, or else smiled and said only: No comment. Felix nodding his head, amused, hands in his pockets. Just girls, is it, he said. Simon looked around at him then. Sorry? he asked.

With a serene expression Felix looked back at him. Is it just girls you like, he said. For a moment Simon said nothing, and then in a low easy tone of voice answered: So far.

Felix’s high laughter then echoing off the facades of houses. Past the street entrance to the caravan park, the golf links silent and blue, the hotel with its bright glass lobby, they walked.

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