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Today is really like the end of my life as I knew it before. If I learn horrible things tomorrow that I must carry with me from now on, I will look back on today and remember it as the end of a better time. We worked on our questions tonight. Byron gave me a long hug to help me face tomorrow. I hope tomorrow does not destroy the memory of the boy I loved. I don’t know what this video is they want us to see.
—Journal entry, October 1999
On the morning of October 8, we went to the sheriff’s department. We had met the lead investigator, Kate Battan, and another investigator, Randy West, when they had questioned us in our lawyer’s office not long after the shootings. They’d been with us for our visit to the Columbine High School library. They were kind and profoundly professional in their interactions with us, and I was never more grateful for this than on that day.
After our initial greeting, Tom and I sat on two of the chairs arranged in rows in a room set up for a formal presentation. I thought about the Harrises, and about the other Columbine families. Sitting on the same chairs at different times seemed to be as close as we could be to each other.
Pointing to various locations on the diagram of the school they’d set up on an easel, Kate and Randy began to tell the story of what Dylan and Eric had done on the morning of April 20, 1999. It was the first time Tom and I learned from an official source what had happened that day, and in the days leading up to it.
The material that follows is graphic, and making the decision to include it here was not an easy one. The victims of this tragedy and their families have endured sorrows and hardships beyond measure, and I don’t want a description of the event itself to reinvigorate the trauma they have already experienced. There is also evidence to suggest that describing how these crimes are committed may provide a road map for other disturbed individuals to follow, although eliminating graphic images and dramatic language and minimizing details mitigates the likelihood of contagion.
That said, it is important to me to acknowledge the heinous acts Dylan and Eric committed prior to their deaths. Because so much of this book is focused on my love for Dylan, it is essential for me also to own the viciousness of his final moments on earth. As a practice, I do not minimize the magnitude of what Dylan did in order to comfort myself, and I never, ever forget how I would feel if Dylan was one of the innocent people slaughtered or maimed that day. My intention here is to honor the precious children and the beloved teacher who were.
Kate began to speak. The massacre had been carefully planned. The boys placed a small decoy bomb in a field about three miles away from the high school, hoping the explosion would distract emergency personnel from the events at the school. They drove to the school and entered the building around 11:15 with two duffel bags containing propane bombs. Outside, Eric ran into Brooks Brown, who reminded him about a test he’d missed. “It doesn’t matter anymore,” Eric said. “Brooks, I like you now. Get out of here. Go home.” Dylan and Eric placed the bombs inside the cafeteria and headed back to their cars to wait. When the bombs in the cafeteria did not explode as planned, the boys came back together, climbed to the top of the steps outside the school’s west entrance and began shooting.
Kate did not share with us the horrible details of what the boys said, how cruelly they treated some people, or where bullets or fragments of debris entered the bodies of the victims. She did her best to reduce the visual and auditory imagery, adhering instead to the chronological facts of who shot whom, which weapons had been used, and where at the school each individual had been injured. Intentional or not, I perceived this as an act of mercy, and I was grateful for it.
Eric shot Rachel Scott, killing her instantly, and Richard Castaldo, who was hit multiple times and paralyzed below the chest. Eric then shot at Daniel Rohrbough and Sean Graves and Lance Kirklin, who were climbing the hill toward them, killing Daniel and wounding the other two. Five students were sitting on the grass opposite the west entrance. Eric shot at them. Michael Johnson was hit, but he ran and escaped with his life. Mark Taylor was also shot multiple times but survived by pretending to be dead. The other three students ran.
Dylan walked down the steps toward the cafeteria. He shot Lance Kirklin and stepped over Sean Graves on his way into the building. Eric, still outside, shot at several students sitting near the door to the cafeteria, paralyzing Anne Marie Hochhalter. Without shooting at anyone or investigating the bombs in the cafeteria, Dylan rejoined him, and together they shot at a distant group of kids who had escaped over the chain-link fence to the soccer fields. They did not hit anyone.
Patti Nielson, a teacher, headed outside from the second floor to stop what she thought must be a video project or a prank. As she approached the doors of the west entrance, the boys shot out the glass in the doors, injuring a student, Brian Anderson, with flying glass and hitting Nielson in the shoulder. Nielson ran into the library and told the students there to get under the tables. She hid under the library counter and called 911.
Columbine’s armed school guard, Deputy Neil Gardner, arrived in the parking lot. Eric shot at him, and Gardner shot back, but Gardner did not hit him. Gardner and another deputy from the Jefferson County Sheriff’s Office also exchanged fire with Eric a little later, but no one was hit.
The boys entered the building. Eric had shot his rifle forty-seven times. Dylan had shot three times with his handgun and two with his shotgun. The boys had also thrown pipe bombs.
Eric and Dylan moved through a hallway, throwing pipe bombs and shooting at random. Stephanie Munson was injured by a bullet. Then Dave Sanders, who taught business at the school, and who had evacuated a huge number of students from the cafeteria and personally seen them to safety, came around the corner, looking for more people to warn. He and another student saw Dylan and Eric and turned to warn some others. Both boys shot down the hallway toward Dave Sanders; it’s still not known whose shots killed him. Rich Long, another teacher, dragged him into a classroom, where two students, Aaron Hancey and Kevin Starkey, administered first aid for three hours. Despite their efforts, he died later that afternoon, still waiting to be evacuated.
Dylan and Eric threw two pipe bombs over the railing into the cafeteria below; these exploded. They threw a pipe bomb into the library hallway that also exploded. Then they went into the library. Eric shot at a desk where Evan Todd was hiding; Evan was hit but not seriously injured. Dylan fatally shot Kyle Velasquez, who was hiding underneath a computer workstation. The boys reloaded and then began shooting out the window at the rescue workers helping the students outside. Dylan then shot at a table, injuring Daniel Steepleton and Makai Hall. Eric shot under a desk without looking, fatally wounding Steven Curnow, and then injured Kacey Ruegsegger. He walked over to another desk and killed Cassie Bernall. Dylan shot Patrick Ireland as he was helping Makai Hall.
Underneath another set of tables, Dylan found Isaiah Shoels, Matthew Kechter, and Craig Scott, Rachel Scott’s younger brother. Dylan hurled racial epithets at Isaiah before Eric shot and killed him. Dylan then shot and killed Matthew Kechter. Eric threw a CO2 cartridge at the table where Makai, Daniel, and Patrick were. Makai managed to throw it away before it exploded.