Someone bumped into us and I mentally said thank God at the same time I was thinking damn it. Adrian cleared his throat, and since the song was faster paced than before, we separated and looked away from each other and got swallowed up in the crowd that had finally gathered. Adrian excused himself to go get drinks and I didn’t realize he never came back. Some time later—I don’t know how long because the songs just kept coming one after the other and Trish was amazingly good at keeping us all herded on the dance floor and waving our arms dorkily in big, group dance moves—Tim went back on the mic and we all wandered back to our seats, sweaty and exhilarated. I found Adrian at our table, checking his phone. I scowled at him and he slipped it back into his pocket.
“All right,” said Tim when everyone had finally settled. “The court of Winter Neverland proudly presents its just-now-voted-upon leaders. Beginning with the least important, this year’s court jester is”—he paused and opened an envelope, then laughed abruptly, blushing—“uh, well, this year’s court jester is actually me.” Everyone laughed as he put a paper Burger King crown on his own head. “Okay, I have the results for the king and queen in my hand. Drumroll please.” A few boys beat the tables rapidly. “Thank you,” Tim said dryly. “Now I know why we don’t have a school band. All right, all right, your Winter Queen is … Jennifer Adams!”
We all looked over at Jenny, who was looking around as if unaware that her name had just been called. Trish nudged her. “Go on up there!”
Luke stood quickly and pulled her chair out, stunned that his date had turned out to be Winter Queen. Jenny walked in an adorably dazed fashion to the front, where Tim placed a laurel crown on her head. She glanced nervously back at us and everyone at our table gave her a thumbs-up and hollered at her obnoxiously.
“And the moment you’ve all been waiting for. Your Winter Court King is…” He dramatically double-checked the piece of paper in front of him. “Adrian de la Mara!”
I looked over at Adrian as everyone clapped and hollered. He looked uncomfortable, then resigned, and stood up, weaving through the tables. “Your Winter Court King and Queen, ladies and gentleman!”
Half a dozen flashes went off as Adrian and Jenny posed together for pictures, and I felt my gut twist. Seeing him stand next to her and smile—even if it was only for the cameras, even if it was only Jenny—highlighted the fact that we were never meant to be together. I clapped along with everyone else, cheering for Jenny because she deserved it, and then took a sip of cider to cover the sudden lump in my throat. My hand was shaking and I set it down.
“New York State of Mind” came on and everyone cheered and flooded the dance floor. I guess even out in the boondocks, there’s state pride. Before Adrian could make his way back to me, I stood and walked over to Stephanie, suddenly not wanting to be near him for a few minutes.
“Caitlin!” she said when I reached her table. She and Tim were the only couple there, so I took an empty seat and sat down.
“Nice announcing, Tim!” I gave him an exaggerated high-five.
He grinned back. “Thanks.” I noticed that he was looking very nice in a traditional suit, and his hair was a normal, natural brown instead of its usual stark black. Stephanie seemed to glow with happiness.
“That is a gorgeous color on you, Steph,” I said. “Really compliments your hair. Don’t you think so, Tim?”
Tim blushed and mumbled, “Yeah.”
“And Tim, seriously, nice job with the mic tonight; they couldn’t have picked a better announcer. Right, Steph?”
She blushed and nodded.
“Well,” I said, mission accomplished, “Adrian’s getting lonely without me. You two have a nice night.”
As I stood up to leave, they were both blushing and smiling and adorable. I went back to Adrian feeling happy—
—which all vanished the moment I saw him sitting with his arm strewn across the back of my chair, a frown darkening his face as he was very intentionally not talking with anyone else at our table. With the Armani suit, the low light, and his natural chiseled-ness, he looked like an asshole. I saw Ben ask him a question, and Adrian flat out ignored him. It was suddenly so obvious that he was only here because he had to be, because it was part of our grand lie. He was a great actor. He was an incredible pretender. And none of it was real. Whatever that thing had been at the cabin, at Christmas, that moment when he’d whispered my name—that was gone.
And just like that, I wanted to be home. Not ranch-home, not bedroom-home, but home. Mystic. Connecticut. The ocean, my mom, my house, my life.
I walked up to Adrian and stopped abruptly. “Can we go?” I asked the back of his head, not wanting to sit.
He looked up at me, then checked his watch. “I think we should wait another twenty or thirty minutes.”
I was going to cry, damn it. “I’d like to leave now,” I said again, struggling to keep my voice from catching.
Without waiting for a reply, I waved good-bye to Trish, grabbed my coat, and headed for the door. I hadn’t even had time to put it on before Adrian caught up to me in the parking lot.
“What is going on?” he demanded, pulling me to a stop.
“Nothing,” I said, wrenching away so he wouldn’t see that I was crying. “Let’s just go, please.”