The Mermaid's Mirror

Chapter 29

Lena's dad seemed to shut down after that.

The shock of finding Lena with the mirror, the image of his lost wife floating up from its depths, the revelation of so many old secrets ... all seemed to drain his spirit. Lena felt like she was looking at a hollowed-out version of her father.

"Please don't stop, Dad," she begged. "I need to know everything."

"I know you do, honey," he said. But he stayed quiet.

The longer he stayed quiet, the edgier Lena became. Finally she burst out, "How could you lie to me all these years?"

He put his hand over his eyes. "I never lied to you, Lena."

"What?!"

"I always told you we lost your mother. There's a difference." As Lena opened her mouth to protest, he looked up and said, "The moment she found her cloak, we lost her. Even if I'd been home, I don't know if I could have stopped her from leaving."

"Dad," said Lena. "I get it. She was under a spell. But you let me think she was dead all these years! There is no excuse for that."

After a long time, voice cracking, he said, "You're right. I'm sorry. I am so sorry. But you don't know ... you don't know how hard it was. You were four years old, and your mother was gone. You were traumatized. You even stopped talking. For months!"

"I'm not four anymore," said Lena bitterly. "I haven't been four in a long time."

When her dad put his hand over his eyes again, Lena snapped, "Stop doing that!"

He dropped his hand, which trembled. "I'm—" He stood up and paced. "Cole will be home soon. We'll have to talk later." A troubled look came over his face. "Allie. She'll be home soon, too."

Lena suddenly remembered the photo of her father, her mother, and Allie, sitting together in a restaurant. Smiling. As if they were the best of friends. "Mom knows, doesn't she?"

"Yes, she does. She was closer to Lucy than any other human besides me. She's wanted me to tell you about her for a long time. And ... Grandma Kath knows, too. She was present at your birth. We ... we weren't sure what would happen when you were born."

Lena blinked. Oh, she thought. They didn't know if I would have legs or a tail. Then a surge of fury flooded her mind. That's really great, she thought. Everyone knew about my mother but me. "Fine," she said, standing up. "If you don't have time to talk, I guess I'll read my letter." She pulled the wrinkled envelope out of her back pocket, darkly pleased to see the expression of pain that crossed her dad's face.

But he didn't try to stop her.

Carrying the comb and mirror and letter, Lena went upstairs to her room. She set the comb down on her desk, then just stood for a long moment staring at the envelope with her name on it.

It was too much. First finding her mother's death certificate saying she'd killed herself ... then finding out she wasn't dead, she was inhuman ...it was too much. Lena's heart felt ragged and damaged. She set the letter down on her desk.

Picking up the mirror, she lay down on her bed, wrapping the sun-moon quilt around her. Stroking the satiny white moon, she gazed into the mirror again, hoping to see the mermaid. Her mother.

But it showed only her face ... her father's blond hair and her mother's pointed chin and her own stormy eyes.

***

Time, faraway and formless, spun out while Lena lay wrapped in her quilt. The light in her room changed from the soft gray of a cloudy afternoon to the deepening shadows of evening.

I must be in shock, she thought, because I can't move.

She heard Allie come home, and pictured her dad breaking the news to her about Lena's discovery. The absence of normal Mom sounds from below—keys landing on the counter, closet door opening and closing, chatty conversation—s old Lena the news was being absorbed in silence.

Then Cole came home, filling the house with his high-pitched voice and happy babble. The noise was a welcome relief to Lena.

But no one came to talk to her.

After a long time, Lena mustered the energy to roll over. She pulled the quilt tighter around her and closed her eyes. But the sound of Cole's Mindbender game kept her from escaping into sleep. The murmur of her parents' voices intruded on her thoughts, and finally she sat up. She pulled out the mirror from under her pillow, but there was no magic in its reflection. She slid it back under her pillow and got out of bed, padding to the top of the stairs.

Lena paused. Part of her wanted to go back to her room ... but the larger part of her was lonely. She wanted to see Allie, and Cole. And even her dad. He'd been such a wreck earlier, she was worried about him.

Lena went down the stairs. When she walked into the family room, Cole jumped up to greet her, as he did every time they were separated for more than a couple of hours.

"Hi!" he said, throwing his arms around her.

Lena bent over his white-blond head, planting a kiss there. "Hi, bud." She mussed his hair and released him.

"Want to play with me?"

"Sure." Lena settled down on the floor next to him and picked up a controller. She glanced at her parents. They were both watching her, as if expecting some dramatic scene.

For some reason this irritated her, and she turned her attention to creating a female warrior.

"Purple hair?" Cole laughed.

"Yes. My player has purple hair, and her superpower is—" Lena scrolled through the options and clicked one. "Swimming."

Allie approached and laid a hand on Lena's hair. "Are you okay?" she asked softly.

Lena fought back the urge to answer, I've just discovered that my mother, whom I thought was dead, is alive, and a mermaid. Sure I'm okay. But she saw the worry in Allie's face, and said simply, "Yeah."

For dinner, Lena's dad made pancakes and eggs. Cole was overjoyed.

"Breakfast for dinner!" he crowed. "Can I have hot chocolate?"

"Sure," said Allie. Her fingers strayed to her earring, twisting it as she gazed into space.

Lena knew that Allie really must not be herself, after giving in to such a request without a second thought.

They ate their breakfast for dinner, and Cole regaled them with tales of past battles on his game. After dinner, Allie and Cole went upstairs, leaving Lena and her father alone in the kitchen. Lena began to load dishes into the dishwasher.

"Leen?"

She looked over at him.

"I'm ready to talk now."

Lena kept loading the dishwasher. What if I don't feel like talking now? she thought. What if I want to pretend none of this is happening ... just for a little while? What if I just want to chat with my friends or watch TV or something?

But that life was over.

She still had friends and school and movies and chat, but she could not pretend she was a normal teen. A strange grief filled her over the loss of her old life.

"Okay," she said.

"Did you read the letter?" asked her dad.

She shook her head.

He studied her for a moment, then said, "I think it's time."

Lena didn't answer at first, then she said, "Can I ... read it in front of you?" She found that she didn't want to be alone with her mother's words.

"Of course. I'll wait here."

Lena retrieved the letter from her room and came back downstairs. She and her dad sat down at the kitchen table again, and Lena opened the envelope.