The Holders

6



I’m not going to throw up, I’m not going to throw up, I’m not going to throw up…

My newfound mantra was endlessly circling in my mind as we bumped down the road towards St Brigid’s Academy. Two plane rides and a two and a half hour van ride were apparently all my motion sickness-prone stomach could handle, and all I could do was pray that we arrived at the school before I made an ass of myself by getting sick all over everyone’s luggage. If I’d thought that asking Taron to drive a little smoother would actually accomplish anything, I might have tried it. However, considering that Taron and I hadn’t gotten off to the friendliest start, nor had he spoken even a word to me since leaving my house that first day, I didn’t figure he’d be in the mood to help me. Actually, I was afraid that he’d get a kick out of my discomfort and would do anything he could to make it worse – which as the driver, he could easily have done. So, I simply sat as still as I could, forehead pressed against the cool glass of the window, praying to the stomach gods.

“We’re here,” Alex called back to us from the front passenger seat.

“Whoa, cool! Check it out, Becca!” Ryland gushed over something I dared not open my eyes to see. I rejoiced inwardly at our arrival, but refused to move a muscle until we had come to a full and complete stop.

“OK,” Alex said happily, as the van finally came to a halt, “everybody out!”

Ryland hopped out as soon as the door slid open, but I hung back a moment, taking a few deep breaths of the cool misty air pouring in the open door.

“Welcome home, lads!” a strange male voice greeted Taron and Alex. A decidedly Scottish voice. I looked out the open door to see a heavyset man with dark hair and a long black coat clapping Alex on the shoulder.

“And who have we here, now?” the man said, stooping down to eye level with Ryland. “Master Ingle, is it? Pleasure to meet you, sir.” He smiled warmly and extended his hand, which Ryland hesitantly shook.

Feeling a bit better – and not wanting to seem like the carsick wussy – I climbed out of the van and took a deep breath of the cool October air. The first thing I noticed however was that while the temperature was close to what it had been in Pittsburgh, the air here smelled different. Fall at home had always smelled like drying leaves and burnt wood, making me think of football and pumpkins and apple pie. But this air was different. It was damp, though not unpleasant, and smelled like sea foam, rain clouds, and musk. The whole atmosphere filled me up, from my hair to my toes, and sparked something deep in my chest that I couldn’t quite put a name to.

“Ah, we have a second?” the stranger asked, pulling me out of my trance. I looked over to greet him, but hesitated when I saw the way he was gawking at me. “Lord have mercy…” he said under his breath. “Alex, is this…?”

Alex stepped forward and placed a hand on the man’s shoulder. “Um, yes. Mr Anderson, this is Ryland and Rebecca Ingle.” He motioned to us each in turn. “Becca, Ryland, this is Mr Christopher Anderson, one of the teachers here at St Brigid’s.”

“Pleasure to meet you, lass, a pleasure indeed. I dare say I think I’d have known her anywhere,” Mr Anderson said with a wink, offering me his hand. “She’s the very image of her father.”

Knowing that he meant that as a compliment, I forced myself to smile – though I couldn’t quite manage a thank you – and shook his outstretched hand.

“Why didn’t you say she would be joining us as well?” Mr Anderson asked Alex.

“Sorry,” Alex said, glancing at me. “I didn’t have a chance. Actually, can I speak with you a moment?” Alex led Mr Anderson off to the side, and I smiled slightly, relief calming my nerves. Alex kept his word.

As the two of them talked out of earshot, Ryland pulled on my sleeve. “Can I look around?”

“Yes, but stay where I can see you.”

As he went running to the other side of the van, Mr Anderson and Alex finished their conversation and parted, Mr Anderson joining Taron to assist with the luggage, while Alex came over to stand beside me.

“I asked Anderson not to say anything,” he said quietly. He didn’t explain, but I knew what he meant.

“Thanks. He doesn’t mind?”

“No, not at all. I just told him you didn’t want him to know until you had a chance to talk to him yourself. Sorry, I know that isn’t the plan, but I was worried anything else would seem odd or raise questions. But he said he understands, and promised to keep quiet. He’s a good man, you don’t need to worry.”

“Thank you,” I said again, truly grateful that he was willing to do this for me.

“No problem,” he said. “Though I should warn you, there is one person that I had to tell so that you would have a room ready for you while you’re here. I gave her the same explanation that I gave Anderson, so there won’t be an issue, I promise.”

“It’s fine, don’t worry,” I assured him with a smile, hating that he actually looked guilty. “I understand.”

“And sorry,” he added, giving me a sympathetic smile, “about what he said.”

“You don’t have to apologize, its fine.” I shrugged. “He meant well.”

“He did, but just to warn you, you’ll probably get that quite a bit at first. You do… well, you do look a lot like him.”

“Really?” I asked, a bit taken aback. “That’s weird, I didn’t used to.” But then, I guess a lot can change in ten years.

“But anyway,” he said in less hushed tone, “this is it.”

As he gestured I took my first real look at our surroundings. We had pulled up in front of a large gray stone building that looked to be as ancient as the ground it was built on, while still being in remarkable condition. There were several other similar looking buildings scattered nearby, all with the same stately elegance. I turned to look down the road we had arrived on, and saw a large gate that appeared to be wrought iron, about a quarter mile back. It was connected to a high wall on either side of it that ran off in opposite directions, probably encompassing the entire campus. Everything, from the stone battlements of the buildings to the beautiful landscaping, had a strange look of nobility and grace to it. It was as if the campus itself was aware of some proud, ancient secret that we mere mortals were not privy to. Even the gray evening sky hung above us like a misty canopy, casting a shadow over the grounds that was haunting yet lovely at the same time.

“What do you think?” Alex asked, as I was taking it all in.

“It’s beautiful.”

As I turned back to examine the main building we had parked in front of, something yellow caught my eye. A young woman with bright blond hair was bounding down the large front steps with a huge smile on her face.

“You’re here, you’re here, you’re here!” she squealed, as she came barreling towards us.

“That’s Chloe,” Alex informed me, “the one I had to tell about you. She is one of our graduates. She’s been… ooff!” He was cut off as Chloe slammed into him, throwing her arms around his waist in the process. Why I suddenly had the urge to throw her off of him, I had no idea.

OK, maybe I had some idea…

She released Alex and began chattering a mile a minute, in a thick Irish accent, “I’m so glad you’re back! I’ve been waiting all day! Is this her? It has to be her! Hi.” She skipped over to me and grabbed both my hands. “I’m Chloe Quinn, it’s so nice to meet you!”

“Chloe,” Alex said rolling his eyes, embarrassed, “take a breath.”

“Sorry,” she mouthed, sliding away from me, and trying to look casual.

She was a good six inches shorter than me, and had a fuller figure while not being overly large, with more freckles spread over her nose and cheeks than I’d ever seen on any one person. In any event, she seemed sweet as could be and totally harmless. Though why she was so excited to see me, I couldn’t figure.

“No, it’s fine,” I assured them both with a laugh. “It’s nice to meet you too, Chloe. I’m Becca.” I offered her my hand and she took it with both of hers, glowing with delight like a kid at Christmas.

“All right, let’s go,” came Taron’s gruff bark from the other side of the van. The bags had been moved from the van to a car that Ryland was already sat in.

“Where are we going?”

“To take Ryland to his dorm so he can get some sleep. After that, we’ll go to the hall where you’ll be staying.”

“He won’t be with us?”

“No, students don’t live in Lorcan, not even the Holder kids. It’s only for the professors who are Holders, me and Chloe. Ryland will be housed with kids his own age.”

“Oh, sure”, I said, with what I hoped was a nonchalant smile. No need to let the world know I was having a minor case of separation anxiety.

With a smile, Alex turned toward the car, clearly expecting me to follow. However when I looked over at the waiting vehicle, my stomach turned.

“Um Alex,” I discreetly touched his arm as he walked by, “is there, umm… any chance I could walk?” I ask, somewhat sheepishly.

He noticed me eyeing the car and smiled. “Carsick?”

I tried to smile, but I’m pretty sure it looked more like a wince.

“I thought you looked a bit green,” he chuckled.

“I’m fine now, as long as I don’t have to get in another–”

“I’ll walk with her!” Chloe interjected, hopping to my side and hugging my arm.

“Is that OK?” Alex asked, making it clear that I could say no. I considered it for a minute, thinking that if I did say no, Alex would be the one to walk with me, but then I realized that, one, that was pathetic, and, two, that’d leave only Taron to take Ryland to his room, and I couldn’t do that to Ry.

“Sure, that would be great,” I agreed. “Just give me one sec,” I said to Chloe, patting her arm. Stepping over to the car I avoided Taron’s glare and called through the window, “Ry, come here.” He lumbered out of the car, his initial awe with the school having been replaced by jetlag. “Listen buddy, Alex is going to take you to your room so you can get some sleep.”

“I’ll give you the number to Becca’s room, so you can call her if you need anything, OK?” Alex said, having come up behind me.

“OK,” Ryland said around a yawn.

“I’ll come to see you in the morning,” I assured him, tousling his hair. “Good night buddy.”

Alex put a hand on his shoulder and led him back to the car. “I’ll meet you at Lorcan,” he said to Chloe, before climbing in the car and driving off.

I watched until the car was out of sight, trying to force myself not to worry about Ry. After all, if this went well I’d be leaving soon, and he would have to get used to doing things on his own.

I took a deep breath and turned to Chloe, who was waiting silently, with her hands clasped together, practically bouncing on the soles of her feet. “So, which way?” I asked, unable to keep from smiling at her barely contained excitement. She gestured to the sidewalk, and we started to make our way down the road into campus.

“I like your outfit,” I said, partially as a conversation starter and partially because it actually was pretty cool. It looked like a school uniform – the St Brigid’s uniform I assumed – that had been modified to add personal flare. Her white button down shirt was open down to the bust, showing a white camisole fringed with black lace. The sleeves of the shirt had been cut short and had cuffs made of lace about halfway between her elbow and shoulder. Her dark green knee length wool skirt had a large three dimensional origami flower sewn onto it, with a matching one pinned in her hair. “Were those neckties?” I asked, pointing to the flowers.

“Yes, aren’t they great? I hated wearing those stupid ties. That was the first thing to get a makeover when I graduated!”

“That’s really cool, you’ll have to show me how to do that.” She didn’t answer, but from the look on her face I was pretty sure I’d just made her day. “When did you graduate?”

“End of last semester. I was brought here when I was six, and have never left. That’s probably why I decided to stay instead of going right to college. I’m so used to it here, and Alex and Min and the rest of the Holders are like family, and-”

“Wait, other Holders? You’re a Holder?”

“Hmm?” she asked, her train of thought having been derailed. “Oh, yes.”

“But Alex said that women don’t usually have abilities?”

“Nope, just me and Min. That’s why I’m so excited! Didn’t Alex tell you? You are the first lady to be in on our little secret in years! I haven’t had another woman to talk with since I was a girl!”

“So there are no other women here? It seems like a big school.”

“Oh sure, there are lasses in with the regular students in the school proper, but no Holders. Lorcan has been a men’s club for as long as I can remember,” she giggled.

“What about… was it Min?”

“Oh Min’s great, but she’s well over three hundred years old. Not the sort you have over for girly chats.”

“Right,” I chuckled under my breath. I had the feeling that Chloe wouldn’t have cared if I was a two-headed murderer straight out of prison, as long as I was under thirty and had boobs.

“So, what do you do? Your ability, I mean.”

I noticed her shoulders sink just a bit. “Oh, nothing much. I’m a Walker is all, and not a good one.”

“What’s a Walker?”

“Time Walker. We can walk in different times.”

“Like time travel? That sounds awesome!”

“Not exactly, no. A full Walker can go to any time or place he wished at a single thought, although he wouldn’t be able to interact with anyone.”

“Because he would mess up history?”

“No,” she laughed. “You watch too much telly! No, I mean literally, he couldn’t, because he isn’t really there. He is only able to see the world at the time he chooses, and no one from that time has any idea he’s looking on. Like a spirit or ghost.”

“So, someone could be here with us right now listening if they wanted to?”

“Sure, I suppose so,” she smiled.

“But why did you say it was nothing? It sounds pretty cool to me.”

“Well,” she sighed, “I’m a female. Like Alex told you, my gifts aren’t half of what they could be. All I can do is move in time, not space. And only forward, no past.”

“Is that bad?”

“Well, it’s not bad, but it’s not exactly useful. Here,” she said, stopping and taking a few steps back, “I’ll show you. Give me a date.”

“Any date?”

“Anything, as long as it’s the future.”

“OK,” I said, getting excited, “how about November 26, 2015.”

Chloe took a slow breath through her nose and closed her eyes. “All right, I’m there. I am still standing in this spot, at the same time of day, only what I see is this spot and time on November 26, 2015.”

“What do you see?” I whispered, as though talking too loud might break her trance – or whatever it was.

“Not much. All the buildings are the same. That tree needs a trim,” she said raising her arm and pointing to the tall willow on the other side of the footpath. “A full Walker would be able to walk around to other parts of campus, or the world for that matter, with no problem. But as soon as I try to move…” She took a step forward, hesitating for a moment, her eyelids tensing up like she was trying to hold onto something. After a long moment she sighed and opened her eyes, deflated. “I lose it.”

Well, that was… anticlimactic, I thought to myself. Not at all like Alex’s Casting demonstration.

“See, like I said, no big deal.” She sounded so sad.

“Hey, it’s more than I’ve got,” I said, as we began walking again. “Alex said that the fact that I graduated two years early from school is my ‘ability’, how lame is that?”

She smiled, perking up a bit. “Yeah, I suppose it’s all right. I just wish I were more useful. What I really want is to be in the Order, but Jocelyn says I’m not strong enough and that it’d be too dangerous.”

“The Order? What’s that? Help with what?”

“Oh,” Chloe bit her lip, looking apologetic, “I should probably let Alex tell you about all that. He knows more about it than I do.”

A particularly cold breeze caught us and we both gave a shiver. “Come on then, let’s get on to Lorcan and get warmed up. And on the way, I can give you a tour!”

“OK,” I said, smiling at her sudden enthusiasm, glad that she was back to being bubbly.

We walked along for about ten minutes, Chloe naming all the buildings we passed, and giving me any pertinent history she knew about each one. Most of the halls were named after Irish saints – Cian, Niall, Aidan, Martin, Cillian – the majority of whom I’d never heard of. She talked about the history of the grounds, and the names of the trees and plants, and said hi to the occasional passerby, though they were few and far between as it was getting dark, and most people were in for the night.

Try as I might to pay attention, my mind began to wander off on its own tangent, namely Jocelyn. I was suddenly acutely aware of the fact that for the first time in ten years we were in vicinity of one another. Every time Chloe pointed out a new building or hall, I realized that he could actually be in there. My heart started to beat faster and I had the urge to duck into a doorway and hide, as if I were actually afraid that he was going to pop out from behind a bush or jump out of a tree at any moment.

Yeah, right.

It was long past time to get a grip. With a huff, I stuffed my hands in my pockets and forced myself to listen to Chloe’s never-ending river of dialogue. She pointed out the cafeteria, and the library. Showed me the dorm where Ryland was housed, and all the different academic buildings that Ryland would have his classes in. We turned onto a smaller footpath that seemed to be leading us away from the campus proper. As we passed through a line of trees, I wondered aloud, “Seems like everything is back over there.”

“Don’t worry, nearly there,” Chloe told me, pointing down the path, and sure enough, there was one building left. In fact, one of the largest buildings we had seen so far.

“Here we are,” Chloe said as we arrived, resting her hand on the banister of the large stone steps leading up to the entrance, “Lorcan Hall.”

It was one of the coolest buildings I had ever seen. It was as though someone from the eighteenth century couldn’t decide whether they wanted to build a church or a castle, so they combined the two. Huge columns framed the giant oak doors, each with two ornate iron hinges and a knocker that looked too heavy to lift. The windows were all stained glass, and had pictures of saints and angels on them, surrounded by intricate Celtic knots.

“It’s amazing,” I said, still in awe.

“I knew you’d like it! Come on, I’ll take you to your room.”

The inside of Lorcan Hall was just as grand as the outside – stone corridors, tapestries, leather furniture, and more stained glass than a Catholic church. After climbing way too many stairs, we finally stopped in front of one of the ornate doors on the third level.

“Here you are. I’m so happy you’re here!” she said, pulling me into a tight hug. “My rooms are right down the way if you need anything,” she added, pointing along the corridor. “There’s a pink flower on the door, you won’t miss it.”

“Great, thanks.”

“Well,” she stepped back reluctantly, “I guess I’ll see you in the morn!” She waved one more time before continuing down the hall. “Fine sleep!”

“Um, yeah, you too,” I said, watching her turn the corner before stepping into my room.

Fine sleep? Must be an Irish thing.

I felt around on the wall for the light switch and flipped it on, in no way prepared for what I was about to see. I had expected a small, dorm-style room – you know, cinder block, one window, prison bed – typical college fare. However, what lay before me could barely be considered a room, much less a dorm. It would better be defined as an apartment! Or at the very least, a studio. I stepped into a small living space complete with couch and TV. To the right of that, through a large open archway was a bedroom with double bed and linens. Connected to that was a bathroom with a toilet, sink, and bathtub with a shower. Best of all, one look inside the bedroom revealed my luggage already there waiting for me on the bed.

Mmm… bed…

Looking at the large mattress with soft white sheets immediately took its toll on my jetlag, and all I could think about was undressing and climbing in. But of course, as soon as I moved to take off my shirt, there was a knock at the door.

It was Alex.

“Hi, sorry, I heard you come up,” he said, seeming a bit on edge, or at least less casual and at ease than he had earlier.

“No, it’s fine,” I said, trying to keep the shake out of my voice. “I’m glad you stopped by. Is Ryland OK?”

“He’s fine. Passed out as soon as we got to his room.” He handed me a card. “This is his building and room. That’s the phone number.”

“Good, thanks.” Why was he nervous? Why was I nervous? Why was I all of a sudden acutely aware that we were mere steps away from my bedroom?

“Is…” He cleared his throat awkwardly. “Is your room OK?”

“Oh gosh, it’s awesome! I was expecting a one-room cell.” I laughed, hoping to ease the tension.

“The rooms in Lorcan are nicer because we live here, but there aren’t many. This room was the only one not in use. My room is,” he cleared his throat again, “right above yours, if you need anything. And Chloe is just down the hall,” he added quickly.

“Yes, she told me, thank you.”

“So… good night then,” he said, with a strange almost sad look in his eyes. He was probably tired.

“Good night.”

Once he was out of sight, I closed the door and shuffled back over to the bed, kicked off my shoes and climbed in, not even bothering to take my clothes off. As I snuggled down into the pillow, I heard footsteps on the floor of the room above me.

Alex’s footsteps.

He was pacing back and forth on what I could only assume was the floor of his bedroom. Normally something like that would keep me awake, but tonight oddly enough it was soothing, and I drifted off to sleep to the soft, rhythmic beat.