The Circle (Hammer)

50



THE SUN IS filtering through the half-open blinds in Nicolaus’s living room. Anna-Karin is sitting on one of the chairs, hunched forward, staring at her feet. She’s wearing red socks. Her left big toe is peeping out.

Now she’s told him everything, without looking him in the eye. She’s told him about her mother. About the boiling water. About Jari. About the ‘accident’. That it was really an attack against her. That she’d tried to play the heroine and it ended in disaster. She’s just finished telling him about Grandpa and now there’s nothing more to say. She’s told him everything and Nicolaus still hasn’t said a word.

Anna-Karin runs her foot across the floor and something sticky attaches itself to her sock. She bends down and plucks at something white, like chewing-gum.

‘Ectoplasm,’ Nicolaus says. ‘They performed a ritual here the other day. You were indirectly involved, from what I understand.’

Anna-Karin looks up. His expression is warm. She’s been expecting a dressing-down. Now she has to fight to hold back the tears. She’s been having regular crying fits ever since she visited Grandpa yesterday. It’s as if all those years of pent-up sadness are coming out.

‘Do you hate me?’ she asks.

‘Of course not.’

‘But the others do, don’t they? They’ve got to.’

‘Nobody hates you, Anna-Karin,’ Nicolaus says calmly. ‘But you should have told us earlier.’

Anna-Karin nods. ‘I was ashamed.’

‘We all do things we’re ashamed of,’ Nicolaus says.

‘But I’ve done so many.’

Nicolaus cocks his head to one side in a way that reminds her a little of Grandpa. ‘Consider my fate for a moment, if you will. I have but one single task: to guide the seven of you. And already two of you are lost. If anyone should feel shame, it’s me.’

‘Do you?’

‘I did,’ he says. ‘But I realised that self-pity had become a place where I hid from the world. A kind of poisoned refuge.’

Anna-Karin says nothing. She picks at the white clump. It feels warm.

‘You’ve made many mistakes. But just as you must learn to forgive your fellow human beings, you must also learn to forgive yourself. Forgiveness is always at hand, Anna-Karin, if you have the courage to accept it.’

Anna-Karin lets Nicolaus’s words sink in. She thinks of Grandpa again.

And I would love you no matter what mistakes you made. Even if you did something wrong, I’d love you, and if someone wanted to hurt you I’d defend you till my last drop of blood.

‘I’m afraid of what the others will say,’ she almost whispers. ‘It’d feel easier if I could tell them one by one … Or, at least, not all at the same time.’

‘Start with the one you feel most comfortable with. Then we’ll call the others together.’

‘I was thinking about something from that night,’ Anna-Karin says. ‘The person who attacked me … Gustaf or his double or whoever it was. He must be like me.’

‘How do you mean?’

‘The voice in my head and how it controlled me. It’s almost like what I can do to others. The one who’s trying to kill us must be an earth witch.’



Gustaf’s family lives on the outskirts of town. The afternoon sun makes the blanket of snow sparkle. The naked birch branches are covered with a thin layer of ice – they look as though they’ve been crafted from delicate glass. Beyond the field, the black water of the canal swirls slowly past. Minoo wonders how many times Rebecka walked along here with Gustaf.

Footprints appear in the snow next to her as she walks. She and Vanessa have claimed to have caught flu to escape today’s practice session at the fairground. The principal swallowed their lie without comment. Minoo doesn’t doubt the woman’s intelligence, but it’s surprisingly easy to lie to her.

They turn down the last street before the edge of the forest. The terrace houses have two floors, with the same dark red wooden panelled façades and black window frames.

They stop in front of Gustaf’s door.

Minoo almost wishes she could have carried out this task on her own. What will Gustaf say when he thinks they’re alone? Will he expose her as someone who goes around locking lips with her dead friend’s murderer? What should she say if he does? How will Vanessa react?

Minoo rings the doorbell. She takes a deep breath and Vanessa gives her hand a squeeze. She doesn’t know if it was meant to say, ‘Let’s do this’, ‘You’ll be fine’ or ‘Pull yourself together, for Christ’s sake. You look like you’re about to shit your pants.’

Gustaf opens the door. His hair is still wet from his shower. It’s a few shades darker and frames his face, making his eyes light up even more clearly. ‘Hi!’ he says. ‘Come in!’

She takes off her shoes and places them on a newspaper that’s spread on the floor.

‘I’m just making us something to eat,’ Gustaf says, and disappears into the kitchen. ‘Do you like tuna?’

Minoo hates tuna. It’s cat food. Hopefully, she won’t have to eat all that much. ‘Yeah, of course!’ she shouts back.

She glances at the closed door. Somewhere over there Vanessa is removing her shoes and putting them in a plastic bag. Suddenly one falls onto the floor and becomes visible.

‘Everything all right?’

Minoo turns. Gustaf is standing in the doorway.

‘I dropped my shoe,’ Minoo answers, and probes his face for any sign of suspicion. She doesn’t detect any. ‘I’ll be right with you,’ she says, and he disappears back into the kitchen.

Minoo turns in time to see the shoe vanish into thin air. She raises an admonishing eyebrow in Vanessa’s direction, then heads into the kitchen.

Gustaf is setting the table. His father is folding away his newspaper and getting up from the table when Minoo enters.

Minoo curses inwardly. It would have been much easier if Gustaf had been alone at home. But she smiles at Gustaf’s father, holds out her hand and introduces herself.

‘I’m Lage,’ he says.

Lage is quite old, but she can see he was every bit as good-looking as Gustaf when he was young. He is tall and erect, and has a fine head of silvery hair. His handshake is firm and warm. ‘I’ve heard a lot about you,’ he says and it feels as if his right hand swallows up Minoo’s when they greet each other.

Minoo fumbles for an answer, but fear leaves her at a loss for words. She just smiles and hopes she’ll come across as shy rather than rude. Lage smoothes out a few crinkles in his folded newspaper – a copy of today’s Engelsfors Herald – and raises it to his forehead in feigned salute. ‘I’ll leave you two in peace,’ he says. ‘I’ll be in the basement working on the new track if you need me.’

‘“The new track”?’ Minoo asks, once he’s disappeared.

‘He’s got a model railway,’ Gustaf says, and puts out two glasses. ‘It’s pretty cool. He’s built a model of old Engelsfors and laid the tracks along the same route as the actual ones. There are lots of stretches of track around here that haven’t been used since the mine and steel works closed down.’

‘That sounds … cool,’ Minoo says.

Gustaf laughs and pours cola for them. ‘Okay, maybe that was the wrong word,’ he says. ‘Sit down.’

She sinks on to a chair and Gustaf is immediately wolfing down his food. Minoo picks cautiously at her tuna. She wonders where Vanessa has positioned herself in the kitchen. Has she already poured the serum over Gustaf’s food? Will he be able to taste it? How will it affect him? Is there a non-human part of him that will realise and react? Does he already know what they’re planning?

Minoo aims at a lettuce leaf. She folds it laboriously with her knife and fork, then stabs the fork through the little green package. She raises it to her mouth, opens and then, as she’d known it would, the lettuce leaf unravels and vinaigrette dribbles down her chin.

She’s sure she hears Vanessa stifle a giggle, and Gustaf grins at her. ‘I always do that,’ Minoo says.

‘I’m the same,’ Gustaf says. ‘You should see me eating tacos.’

She wonders if he’s lying to make her feel better. She’s never seen Gustaf do anything clumsy. ‘But tacos don’t count,’ she says. ‘That’s a dish with built-in humiliation.’

Gustaf laughs. ‘Rebecka said you were funny.’

And then she sees an ever so faint ripple appear on Gustaf’s cola. Vanessa has poured in the serum.

‘I was so happy when you said you wanted to meet,’ Gustaf says. ‘You and I knew Rebecka better than anyone. It somehow feels important that we keep in touch. You know what I mean?’

‘Yes,’ Minoo answers. She has to force herself not to stare at Gustaf’s glass.

‘She often talked about you,’ he says.

He raises his glass to his mouth and takes a few sips. Minoo forces herself to drink a little from her own. Don’t stare, she thinks. Don’t give yourself away by staring.

‘Do you think the cola tastes strange?’ Gustaf says.

Here it comes. Here it comes.

‘No.’ Minoo shakes her head firmly and takes a few extra sips for good measure.

‘I’ve only just opened it,’ he says thoughtfully. Then he shrugs his shoulders. ‘I hope I’m not coming down with flu. Everything tastes strange when I’m getting ill.’ And with that he knocks back the whole glass.

Holy shit! Minoo almost blurts. It’s as if she’s paralysed, expecting Gustaf to fall off his chair, clawing at his throat. ‘I feel a bit dizzy,’ he says.

Minoo swallows. ‘Maybe we should go to your room,’ she suggests.

Gustaf looks confused. ‘So you can lie down for a bit,’ she says.

‘Maybe you’re right.’

His voice is toneless, but he gets up.

My God, Minoo thinks. Ida didn’t react like that. What if we’ve given him too much?

She hears footsteps coming up the basement steps, heavy and quick. Minoo’s thoughts run wild. Where does Gustaf keep his doppelganger hidden all day –and what better place to put a doppelganger than in your basement? Maybe his dad is in on it, or maybe he’s even masterminded the whole thing –or else it’s just a big mistake and both Gustaf and his father are innocent but Minoo has given Gustaf a fatal dose of a magic potion.

Minoo flies out of her chair and puts her arm around Gustaf, who looks as if he’s about to faint.

The basement door opens and Gustaf’s father steps out.

‘I was going to ask if you’d made enough food for me …’ Lage starts, but then he catches sight of Gustaf. ‘Are you all right, Gurra? You look pale.’

‘I felt dizzy but now I’m fine.’

Lage walks over and lays a hand on Gustaf’s forehead. ‘You’re not warm anyway.’

‘Minoo thinks I should lie down for a bit,’ Gustaf says.

‘Maybe he overdid it at practice.’ Minoo turns to Gustaf. ‘Come on, let’s go up to your room.’

Lage looks at Gustaf with concern. ‘Come and fetch me if he gets any worse. I’ll be down here.’

‘Yes, you will,’ Gustaf says.

‘My mother’s a doctor,’ Minoo jabbers. ‘The flu going around is pretty nasty. It hits you out of nowhere and you’re as sick as dog.’ Minoo takes Gustaf’s arm and lets him show her the way to his room on the second floor.

‘Can you turn on the light?’ she asks, as they enter the darkened room.

‘Yes,’ he answers, and collapses on to his bed with a heavy thud.

It takes Minoo a second to pick up on it – it’s like when little kids are trying to be funny and answer exactly what you ask them, no more.

‘Where’s the switch?’ Minoo asks.

‘To the right of the door.’

She turns on the ceiling light. The bed that Gustaf is lying on is unmade. Otherwise the room is tidy.

On the wall beside the bed there’s a photo of Rebecka and Gustaf. Their faces fill the frame so it’s impossible to determine where it was taken. You can only tell from the light that it was shot outside. They look happy. At that particular hundredth of a second that the camera captured, they had no idea of what was in store for them.

Gustaf may have known, she reminds herself. Far from depicting a happy couple, it may be of a murderer and his victim.

She feels a gentle shove. It’s not hard to interpret. Vanessa thinks Minoo should get a move on – and she’s right. Who knows how long the serum will last. A drop lasted about a minute with Ida. Minoo has worked out that they ought to have at least ten minutes but they’ve already lost some time. And Gustaf is bigger than Ida.

Minoo sits on the edge of the bed. The list of questions she’s prepared is in her jeans pocket. She leaves it there. ‘Did you love Rebecka?’

‘Yes,’ Gustaf answers, without hesitation. ‘More than anything else in the world.’

‘When you were at her grave, you asked for her forgiveness.’

Gustaf nods and a tear trickles from the corner of his eye, continues along his temple and disappears into his blond hair. He’s lying completely still, looking at Minoo with a frightened expression.

‘Did you have anything to do with her death?’

‘Yes,’ he answers.

Minoo’s blood runs cold. ‘Tell me about it,’ she forces herself to say.

‘It was my fault. Everyone said Rebecka had an eating disorder, but I was too much of a coward to ask her straight out. I didn’t want to upset her, and I didn’t want her to think I was hassling her. I never realised how serious it was. I should have spoken to her about it.’

He continues looking at Minoo with big, frightened eyes.

‘You think Rebecka killed herself, don’t you?’ she says.

The question seems to confuse him. ‘Yes,’ he says. ‘She jumped from the roof of the school. It was my fault. If I had been a better boyfriend, it would never have happened.’

Minoo glances at the photo and wonders if Rebecka can see them. She hopes not because she feels so ashamed of what she’s doing.

‘Were you up on the roof with her?’ she asks.

‘I was waiting for her downstairs. She was having her meeting with the principal.’

He lays a hand on Minoo’s arm. His fingers are cold. ‘I hoped the principal would talk to her about her eating disorder. Maybe get her to open up about it, so I wouldn’t have to. I was such a coward.’

‘Have you done anything special this autumn? Have you contacted anyone?’

‘What do you mean?’

Minoo feels another impatient shove, a reminder that time is running out. ‘Have you been in contact with any demons?’

He looks confused. Like a child who’s been asked a far too grown-up question.

‘Have you engaged in any supernatural activities?’ Minoo continues.

‘No.’

It’s clear he has no idea what she’s talking about.

‘You may not even know about it. Think for a second. Has anything strange happened?’

He shakes his head.

‘Do you ever hear a voice inside your head telling you to do things?’

He shakes his head again.

‘What’s the first thing that comes into your mind when I say “blood-red moon”?’

‘Blood orange.’

‘Do you have a doppelganger?’

‘No,’ he says weakly. ‘I don’t think so.’

‘I can’t handle this,’ Vanessa says.

Minoo understands how she feels. To see Gustaf so afraid and vulnerable is almost more than she can bear. It’s like something out of the Spanish inquisition. But she has another question, and she can only hope Gustaf won’t say anything about the kiss because, unlike him, Vanessa won’t forget everything afterwards.

‘Did you follow me into town one day and then meet me by the viaduct?’

‘No.’

‘I met you there, and we … spoke. Do you remember that?’

‘No.’

‘And yet you were at the cemetery. That was when you visited Rebecka’s grave for the first time. You were in two places at once. How was that possible?’

Gustaf shakes his head. ‘I don’t understand,’ he says. ‘Your questions are so strange.’

Minoo can’t take it any more. She tries to coax his fingers from her arm, but he’s holding it in an iron grip. She strokes them gently, hoping that will calm him.

It works. His grip loosens and she gets up.

‘I’m sorry,’ she says.

‘What are you saying sorry about?’

‘All of this.’

‘I like you, Minoo,’ he says.

‘I like you, too,’ she says, and discovers she means it. ‘I wish I could tell you how Rebecka died, but it wasn’t your fault.’

‘Minoo, what are you doing?’ Vanessa whispers.

But Minoo ignores her. It’s very easy to ignore someone who’s invisible. ‘I want to ask you to try to remember one thing.’ Minoo says. ‘Try to remember it somewhere deep inside you. Can you promise you’ll try?’

‘I promise I’ll try,’ Gustaf says.

‘It wasn’t your fault. Rebecka loved you.’

Fresh tears well in Gustaf’s eyes and Minoo nods, trying to ingrain it into his subconscious. ‘She would never have left you of her own accord,’ she says.

Gustaf smiles cautiously. ‘I’m tired,’ he says.

‘You should sleep for a while.’

Gustaf shuts his eyes and Minoo and Vanessa stay in the room until he’s dropped off. Then they sneak out, careful not to wake him.