We finally decided it wasn’t worth the hassle of a lost finger and let them f lop back into the river. His other catches included a yellow boot, a giant turtle that asked us for a pocket watch, and what looked like a large, normal catfish. That is, until it started sobbing enormous tears, begging us to return it to its family. I might’ve ignored the wailing fish and stuck it over the fire anyway, but the softhearted Goodfel ow let it go.
“You realize you’ve just been duped by a fish,” I said, watching the catfish grin at me before slipping into the dark waters, lost from view.
Puck shrugged.
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“Hey, it was going to name one of its grandfish after me,” he said, tossing the line into the water again. “That’s one of my rules, you know. I refuse to eat anything that names its kid after me.”
“Fish don’t have children,” I deadpanned. “Fish have fry.”
“Even so.”
“Fine.” I rolled my eyes and stepped back from the edge. “I’m done with this. Let me know if you manage to catch anything useful.” I wandered back to the fire, where Ariel a looked up and smiled faintly, as if she knew exactly how the fishing had gone.
“Here,” she said, and tossed me a round, pinkish globe. I caught it automatically, blinking as I realized what it was. A peach, fuzzy and soft and nearly the size of my fist. I glanced beside her and saw she had a whole basket of them.
“Where did you find these?” I asked in amazement. She chuckled.
“The river,” she replied, nodding to the dark, glittering water. “You can find almost anything a human would dream of, provided you know what to look for. While you and Puck have been wrestling with nightmares, I just keep an eye on the surface and let the dream debris come.”
“Sounds like you’ve done this before,” I said, taking a seat beside her.
“Not really,” she admitted. “I’ve never been to the river in person. But as a seer I can sometimes see into dreams, whether they be faery or mortal.
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Dreamwalking, I believe it’s called. And sometimes, I can even shape those dreams, make a person see what I want them to.”
“Like you did with mine.”
She was silent a moment, gazing back into the fire. “Yes,” she murmured finally. “I’m sorry, Ash. But I wanted you to see what would’ve happened if Meghan had lost. I wanted you to understand why I chose what I did, even though I knew it would hurt.”
“Did you…” I paused, gathering my thoughts. “Did you see my dreams…before?” Before I found Meghan, before I learned to freeze out my emotions—the nightmares that kept me awake at night, because I knew closing my eyes would force me to live that day over and over again.
Ariel a shivered, drawing her knees to her chest, and nodded. “I wished I could have helped you.” She sighed, resting her chin on a knee. “Between you and Puck, it was all I could do not to let you know I was still alive.”
I frowned. Puck had had nightmares, too? I pushed that thought away, unwilling to dwel on it. If he had been suffering like me, good. He deserved it.
“So,” I asked, changing the subject, “what comes next?” Ariel a sighed. “I don’t know,” she murmured, almost to herself.
“Everything is so hazy now. I’ve never been this far into the wyldwood.”
“I haven’t, either.”
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“But that doesn’t worry you, does it?” She hugged herself and gazed out over the river. “You’ll do whatever it takes, won’t you? You’ve always been that way. Completely fearless.” She shivered again and closed her eyes, seeming to sink into herself. “I wish I could be like that.”
“I’m not fearless,” I told her. “There are a lot of things that scare me.” Failure. My own savage, Unseelie nature. Being unable to save those I had sworn to protect. Having my heart ripped from me once more.
“I’m not fearless,” I said again. “Not by a long shot.” Ariel a gave me a sideways glance, as if she knew what I was thinking.
“Yes, but you aren’t afraid of the things the rest of us are afraid of,” she said wryly. “The things that should terrify you don’t.”
“Like what?” I challenged, mostly to get her talking, to argue with me as she had before. This new Ariel a, quiet and sad, bowed under the weight of terrible knowledge and countless secrets, was more then I could take. I wanted her to laugh again, to smile like she used to. Grinning, I bit into the peach, adopting a careless, defiant posture. “Name something you think I should be afraid of.”
“Dragons,” Ariel a said immediately, making me snort. “Giants, hydras, manticores. Take your pick. Not only do you lack a healthy respect for them, you go charging into their lairs to challenge them to a fight.”
“I have a healthy respect for manticores,” I argued. “And I avoid picking fights with dragons. You’re lumping me together with Goodfel ow.”
“Regardless—” Ariel a mock-glared at me “—it’s not the same. I have a healthy respect for kelpies, but that doesn’t mean I’d ever go swim-ming with one.” She wrinkled her nose at me. “Not like you and Puck, 105/387
seeing how long you could stay on that kelpie’s back without drowning or getting eaten.”